THE SOUND OF THE PIANO greets me when I enter my house after a long day at work. Itâs been over two weeks since someone touched that thing. And just like last time, the noise in my head fades into the background.
I donât have to walk into the living room to know Miaâs there, playing âPainting Greysâ by Emmit Fennâone of the songs from my playlist.
I didnât expect her to listen.
Leaving the keys on the side table, I cross the hallway far too eagerly. She looks obscenely cute in a pink pinafore dress and a long-sleeved top. No heels today, just snow-white sneakers. I make a mental note to ask Cody if his girl always looks like a little marshmallow.
Wrong visual. Marshmallows are food. Food is meant to be eaten, and fuck if eating Mia hasnât crossed my mind a million times already.
âHi,â she says without glancing backward. âDo you mind?â
Iâm not sure how she knows itâs me. Whether she distinguishes my step from the triplets or if she smells my cologne.
âNot at all. Have at it.â
I pull my AirPod out and take a seat on the armrest of the couch, watching her play. She tilts her head, grazing her cheek over her shoulder. I donât think itâs a nervous gesture. More like sheâs seeking comfort. âYour brothers are getting ready, and I couldnât help myself. I love this piano.â
It takes me by surprise, but thereâs no denying itâI love when she plays this piano. Sheâs ridiculously talented. Even my mother canât elicit such emotion from a simple melody. Each note Mia plays burrows its way under my skin.
âYou can play here whenever you want.â
She slowly turns on the stool when the song ends, her fingers partly hidden under the long sleeves. Eyes green like freshly mowed grass stare into mine, forcing my heartâs rhythm into a higher gear.
I wonder if thatâs what cartoonists imply when drawing charactersâ hearts stretching a foot away from the body, stretching the skin to breaking point with each beat.
Every man has a type.
Blondes, brunettes, tall, short. After all, beauty is subjective. Just because I find a woman attractive doesnât mean other men do. Take my brothers and me. Theoâs wife, Thalia, is my type by defaultâa tall, sharp-tongued, confident brunette, yet she doesnât strike the right chord for me. Theo, on the other hand, looks at her like sheâs a goddess incarnated.
Iâm drawn to women with protruding cheekbones, long, dark hair, and wasp waists. The sophisticated divas who seductively sway their hips, holding their heads up high. Those who ooze sexuality and confidence. Those who seduce a man with one look. They can bait, hook and haul my ass to their table with a lick of a tongue across blood-red lips.
Miaâs not that type, but she is gorgeous. Cuter than fucking cute. A total opposite of what I usually go for with that pretty, round face of hers and tiny curvy body.
Iâve always been a sucker for pretty, shiny thingsâ¦
Miaâs exactly that. Pretty and shiny like the colorful, butterfly-shaped brooch pinned to her blouse.
âDonât say that. I might abuse the privilege.â
âNo one save for my mother touches this thing. It could use the attention. Play whenever youâre around.â
However often that may be.
I want her here; but I really donât fucking want her here because I donât understand my fascination with this girl. Iâm way out of my depth. I should divert my needs to someone else pronto. Newport is full of willing women.
Too bad not one piqued my interest lately enough to buy her a drink, let alone fuck her. Theyâre all lacking in one way or another. Too much cleavage, too much makeup, skirts too short, boobs too fake, voice too high.
âThank you,â Mia says. âIâve got a Yamaha at home, but itâs not as good as this. My dad bought the first piano he saw when Grandad started giving me lessons. Iâve been meaning to change it, butâ¦â She flashes me another one of those shy, barely-there smiles. âSentimental value.â
I cross the room to make a drink. Miaâs sweet perfume hangs in the air here, targeting my nose as I move. âYou want wine?â I ask, reaching for a crystal glass. She shakes her head, toying with her bracelets. âMy mother has a 1904 Steinway in her living room. Thatâs what I wanted to show you after you had your tattoo done. I knew youâd appreciate it.â
âIâm sure I will. Monica asked if I could play at the Ball. She said she always brings that piano to the venue.â
Monica? âHow do you know my mother?â
âIâve been helping a little with the Charity events she organizes.â She tugs her sleeves until her hands are almost completely covered, then picks at a loose thread.
Sheâs nervous around me.
I donât like that. I want her at ease. Comfortable.
Codyâs words pop into my mind.
âMia needed to calm down. Piano does the trick.â
âPlay something for me.â
Scarlet paints her cheeks as if someone pressed a button on her neck that sends blood to her face.
Fuckâ¦
Why is that so satisfying?
She turns around, her fingers back on the keys. My body erupts into a fit of hot and cold sweats when âDream Onâ by Aerosmith fills the room. I could listen to this song for hours on end, never growing bored.
How the hell does she know itâs my favorite?
The melody seems softer, a little slower, and⦠she opens her mouth to sing. Sheâs a gentler version of Dolly Parton; her voice soft, laced with a raspy undertone you canât hear when she speaks but overpowers you once she hits the higher registers.
The urge to join her hits me like a freight train.
I grip the armrest, gouging my fingers into the leather, anchoring myself in place. Iâve not touched the piano in ten years, but I want to sit beside Mia and play.
No.
I want to sit behind her⦠my legs boxing her thighs, my arm across her middle, one hand on the keys, her back flush against my chest. The sweet smell of her perfume. The warmth of her bodyâ¦
What the fuck is it about her?
Her blonde locks swinging from left to right in a ponytail as she plays are all I see; the lyrics pouring from her pouty mouth are all I hear. Iâm in a daze until the melody ceases too soon.
âI believe thatâs your favorite song,â she says, turning back around.
âHow did you know?â
âI know a lot about you. Youâre a stockbroker. A very good one. Your birthdayâs next week. You donât like birthday cake and eat apple pie with raisins instead. You like spaghetti, warm chocolate brownies, sky diving, and the color green.â
I cock a questioning eyebrow but donât stop her. This isnât the kind of information my mother would share if she played cupidâwhich she does often latelyâso I know Miaâs not getting it from her.
âWhen you were four, Theo broke your foot with an iron. Youâve got a birthmark on your right shoulder in the shape of a bunny. Your favorite movie growing up was Oscar with Stallone, but your mom didnât let you watch it. Not that it stopped you⦠you watched it elsewhere.â She bites down a smile. âShould I keep going?â
The corner of my lips turns up against better judgment. Itâs hard not to smile when sheâs around, a little ray of sunshine. âThose Bridge sessions⦠you play with my grandmother, donât you? Am I the only one she talks about, or just the only one you pay attention to?â
Someone pushes that cheek-reddening button again.
âI can tell you something about all your brothers. When he was five, Shawn thought forcing Logan into the tumble dryer would be funny. He only went in halfway but braced his elbows inside. It took your mom an hour to get him out.â
âI donât remember that, but I heard about it. Why do you play with my grandparents? Theyâre eighty.â
âWhich part surprises you? That I know how to play Bridge or that I play with people four times my age?â
Both. Bridge is not an easy game. I tried wrapping my head around the rules more than once. I gave up quickly, even though numbers are my forte.
âI like spending time with them,â she continues. âI like when Rita talks about the seven of you with so much love in her voice, and I like their stories about life in the fifties.â
Sheâs a college girl. Far from those my brothers got me used to, though. Other than a handful of smart, normal girls, they mostly bring home poster kids for stereotype. Those who care more about their appearance and getting attention from boys than anything else.
Itâs fine, I guess. Theyâre young. Thatâs what youth is aboutâfun, but those types of girls only appeal to boys. They may be admired while at school, but once those years are over, boys become men. They want more than short skirts, immaculate makeup, and mind-blowing blowjobs.
âHow did you join their group?â
âWell, Kenneth, who plays with them, is my neighbor. I help him with small chores, so weâre pretty close. When their fourth, Patti, fell ill last year, he asked if I could play with him and your grandparents just that once.â A sad grimace twists her lips. âPatti passed away a few days later. Iâve played every week since.â
âItâs unfair you know all about me, and I know nothing about you.â
She crosses her ankles, pulling her shoulders back. âIâm not interesting.â
âI very much doubt that.â Footsteps thump on the stairs, halting our conversation. I canât help the hot ball of irritability swelling behind my ribs that our alone time was cut short. âWhere are you heading tonight?â
âWeâre still arguing about that.â
âWeâre not arguing, Bug.â Cody arrives in a black tee and fitted jeans, his hair tied back in a low bun. âYouâre just too stubborn.â He rests his fists on the stool, framing her thighs, and pecks the crown of her head. âIndulge me, okay?â
Mia starts the nervous ritual again, toying with her rings when Cody straightens up, lifting his chin at me in greeting.
âYou promised weâll go to the arcades,â she says. âYou promised to show me how you cheat the claw machine.â
âI will, but first, you should practice. When Iâm happy you can keep yourself safe, Iâll buy you ten damn teddies, alright?â
She rises to her feet, stepping away from the piano. âIf I can break free, weâre going to the arcades. Go on. Grab me.â
Sheâs adorable.
Five-foot-nothing acting tough. Itâs like watching a Yorkie pick a fight with a German Shepherd.
âDrop your hands,â Cody says, taking a firm stance behind Mia, the tension in his posture clearly visible.
Once she complies, he wraps himself around her ribs, clamping her arms against her body. It takes Mia two seconds to assess her position before she glances at me, taking Codyâs hand and bending his index finger all the way back. A pained grimace taints his features, and his hold loosens, allowing her to spin around and step on his foot.
âNow imagine Iâm in heels, which I always wear on dates,â she tuts, beaming a smile full of mischief. âI think Iâm free.â
Cody drapes his arm around her back, his fingers splayed across the middle, forcing Mia closer. âBecause we already practiced this. Thereâs a ton more I want to teach you. Weâll go to the arcades tonight, but donât think this is over.â
âYou should box her in better,â I say. I donât want them to leave. Although, thatâs not the main reason I opened my mouth. Codyâs about ready to kiss her, and no way in hell can I calmly watch. âShe knows how to break free when she can use her arms and legs. What happens if she canât?â
âI broke Brandonâs nose!â she whines, stepping away from Cody. âI can take care of myself well enough.â
You shouldnât. You should be cared for.
âYou broke his nose because he didnât expect you to break free. Brandon thinks a lot of himself, Mia. Anyone attacking you will know how to limit your moves effectively. Brandon forced you into his lap, right?â
âHis mistake. Thereâs always a soft spot available no matter how a man grabs me.â
No, thereâs not. Not an obvious one, at least.
âStop her moving her arms and legs, then show her how to break free,â I tell Cody.
âWeâre not practicing sick, getting-tied-up scenarios. Thatâs way too extreme. Basic self-defense will be enough to deal with Brandon if he tries his luck again.â
You should fucking deal with him.
Colt and Conor join us, both dressed to head out. They greet me before plopping down on the couch, silent observers.
âI didnât say you should tie her up. Just limit her moves.â
Cody studies me, then glances at Colt and Conor like heâs searching for backup. Or maybe a second opinion. I canât tell.
âI donât know how to immobilize her like that,â he admits. âHow do I do this?â
I try explaining how he has to grab Mia, but he fails miserably. Either heâs worried heâll scare her, afraid heâll hurt her, or he canât follow instructions because Mia frees her elbow every time. Heâs not putting enough strength into the hold.
âCan I try?â I ask. He grinds his teeth but bobs his head once, eyes shooting daggers my way. I donât give him time to think this through, looking at Mia. âYou wonât be able to move once I grab you, so you need to trust I wonât hurt you.â
That might be a challenge⦠I donât think she trusts me. Sheâs as skittish as a baby deer, flinching whenever I get close.
Intimidatingâthatâs everyoneâs one-word description of me. Thalia and Cass admitted I put them on edge like a snarling dog with rabies. Nothing new there. Most people straighten their backs in my presence, but it drives me up the wall to see it from Mia.
All my life, I pursued women who made me feel like I was licking honey off a freshly sharpened knife edge. Miaâs not even blunt-side sharp. Sheâs soft. Fragile, as if assembled from delicate soap bubbles.
Iâve no idea how to handle that. Iâm a bull in a fucking China shop around her.
The triplets silently watch the unfolding scene. With each passing second, I drown them out until I donât see them anymore. Itâs just the boorish me and the gentle her. She swallows hard, taking a few small, hasty steps down the couch.
Once sheâs within reach, I cuff her wrist, cursing internally when she flinches at the urgency of my touch.
Possessive. Thatâs how I feel when sheâs in my personal space. A dog with a bone.
I tug her hand, forcing her to nestle that perfect ass in the space between my legs. Iâve never been this self-conscious, never wondered if I gripped, yanked, or squeezed a woman too hard⦠now Iâm hyperaware of what Iâm doing, and I think my hold on Miaâs wrist might be too tight.
Iâm also hyperaware this was a bad idea.
The hairs on my neck rise. Blood in my veins flows like cherry slurpy. My pulse accelerates the second she curves into my arms, fitting perfectly. The honeysuckle smell of her perfume or body lotion is nothing short of intoxicating. Iâm glad I chose a long-sleeve tee today, or how she makes me feel would be clearly visible to my brothers.
Fuck⦠even I didnât realize how powerful this pull between us is. Now that sheâs close, my whole body hums with a feverish, impatient, get-it-done-now kind of energy.
I take her hands, wrapping our arms around her docile frame like a straitjacket. My legs box hers in, squeezing them together with my ankles crossed over her feet. Her breathing hiccups. Mine catches in my throat before I shakily push it past my lips, resting my chin on top of her head where she canât headbutt my nose.
And she fucking melts against me.
Jesusâ¦
What am I going to do with you, baby?
My lungs decompress, squeezed by an invisible iron clamp when her heart picks up rhythm under my fingertips, matching the frantic beat of mine.
âYouâre panicking,â I say, my voice steady even though my stomach twists like a wrung-out towel.
âCalm down, Bug, youâre fine,â Cody adds, reminding me of his existence. âHe wonât hurt you.â
Protectiveness goes bang inside me, swelling, growing, and spreading through my structure. No way in hell Iâll ever hurt her. She knows I wonât.
At least, I hope she does.
âYou need to stay calm, Mia,â I continue. âFear will choke you. You wonât break free if youâre not thinking clearly. Take a deep breath for me.â
She does, slowly filling her lungs. I breathe with her until we both calm the fuck down.
âGood. Youâre fine. Iâll let you go if you ask.â
âLet me go.â
I do. Immediately. Scaring her is the last thing on my list. My legs open, and arms rise, but she doesnât budge.
âOkay. I just had to check,â she says. âYou can continue.â
And I do. Immediately. Hungry for that peaceful trance-like state when sheâs safely tucked against me.
Seconds later Iâve got her immobilized, my chin on her shoulder this time, so she doesnât crush my windpipe with the back of her head. âNow, think.â I tighten my hold around her fingers. âYou canât move your arms or legs. You canât shove me away. What can you do?â
âUmâ¦â She considers her position, trying to wriggle free like she did with Cody, but itâs useless.
Now that sheâs flush against me, I feel her with every fiber in me. Iâm not letting her go until I absolutely have to.
âI can hit you with the side of my head.â
âNo. Donât ever try that. It could work, but youâll black out if you hit your temple against the wrong spot.â
Instinctively my thumb grazes hers in an odd, mechanical reflex.
I shouldnât do that.
Where is this urge to soothe her coming from?
Iâve always been grossly overprotective, but it manifested in unhealthy jealousy, rage fits, and fist-throwing at anyone who said one wrong word to my ex. I never soothed Kaya unless she was bawling her eyes out. Even then, I didnât do a good job because I was more annoyed than concerned.
Not now. The need to keep Mia calm fastens itself around my throat so tightly Iâll choke if sheâs not at ease.
âAccept that you canât hit me,â I continue. âYou have to be more creative.â
It takes a moment, but she tilts her head, accidentally brushing those full, soft lips against my jaw. âI can bite you.â
âGood girl.â I inhale a subtle deep breath, shepherding the desire rekindling in my gut. âBite hard enough, and the guy will let go. Itâs a reflex. Hands go where it hurts. Once you can use your hands, you know what to do, right?â
She nods, and very reluctantly, I let. Her. Go.
âFine,â she tells Cody, back on her feet. âWe can practice tonight but promise youâll take me to the arcades this week.â
âYou know any more moves like that?â Colt asks me, creases lining his forehead. âAnything we can teach her?â
Unfortunately, I do. I learned how to restrain a woman when I dated Kaya. She was an alcoholic. Out of control. Whenever she got hammered, she either threw anything within reach at me or tried to hurt herself. âYeah. I know a few things.â
We go over two more scenarios. After a couple of attempts to explain how Cody should do it, he waves me off and leaves me in charge.
Fine by me.
I have Mia pinned against the wall half a minute later, her wrists locked in my hand, legs boxed by one of mine. I tell herâcalmlyâwhat her next move should be while I scream inside my head, schooling myself not to do something stupid.
There are more things she should learn, more things I could show her, but sheâd have to lie down, and if I cover her body with mine, thereâll be no rationalizing.
Instead of turning my brother against me, I call it a night.
Mia
âCooties!â Jake yells, pointing his finger at me. âSheâs got cooties! Stay away!â
All the other children squeal and stumble back, leaving me alone in the middle of the room.
âI donât have cooties!â I say, my voice squeaky.
âYou do! Youâve got cooties! Donât touch me!â
âI donât have cooties!â I cry again and take a step forward. Tears pool in my eyes when all the other children start running away every time I step toward them.
I donât want to be here. I miss Daddy and my sister.
The children are mean, and Mrs. Jeffrey smells like onions.
âDonât let her touch any toys!â Jake commands again. âSheâs got cooties! If you touch her, youâll have it too!â
He runs around, scooting toys off the floor and throwing them in one corner. All the other children follow his lead until all the toys are out of my reach.
âNow, now, Jake, thatâs not nice, is it?â Mrs. Jeffrey asks, lifting her head from a stack of papers on her desk. âPlay nice. All of you.â She looks back down, and Jake whispers to the other kids, pointing his finger at me and laughing while I stand there, alone, sad, and crying.