Wide awake and in the presence of the beautiful sun outside, I found myself appreciating the German city more and more. I had always dreamt of visiting Europe, the place was the essence of history and lessons to learn, but with Mr Killjoy present, it was hard to appreciate anything in its entirety. He was dressed in a sharp blue suit, and on more than one occasion I had to tear my eyes away from him before he would start noticing something. I had opted for a soft yellow dress; some might even argue it was cream. The shapewear I had purchased had been a godsend under this, and I was admiring the flatness of my tummy every second I could see myself in the mirror. Sure, it made breathing tough for the first few minutes, but who needed air anyway?
Jade and Monica were perfectly paired like two peas in a pod, down to even their shoes being the same shade of black. Jade's braids were held behind in a ponytail while Monica had made a smooth looking bun. We were all at our professional best and then there was Jason, dressed in possibly the messiest red shirt and black pants, the top buttons of his shirt undone. He looked very much like a fuckboy with daddy's wallet in the look, and I had no doubt this is what he would have looked like all those years ago at HBS. He was a year younger than Aiden, but Aiden had identified his talent before anyone else had and grabbed the opportunity to lock down the man with both hands.
Now, the world is chasing after Jason Emerson. But Jason would never forget the face that had faith in him when no one else did. He had practically shared many of Aiden's firsts in the business, and leaving Steele Enterprises was like leaving home.
Don't quote me on it, I only read it in his Forbes interview last week.
While Monica and Jade worked in tandem to run the meeting smoothly, Aiden and Jason carried on negotiations with the dealers we were losing our relationship with. Someone else was offering higher returns, but would they come with the trust of the Steeles? The Germans discussed among themselves in hushed tones, and I found the complete exercise unnecessary. They could be screaming and I wouldn't understand shit.
Jason cracked jokes and made light of the situation with the men when we took a break, and I realized that his outfit and demeanour both served a purpose. He wasn't here as CMO of Steele Enterprises. He wanted to appear like he was a friend of theirs, who was hoping to build a broken bridge. Fucking geniuses.
Aiden turned to me, "What do you think?"
I hadn't spoken a word since I had entered the room, but being put on the spot like that was nothing new. Luckily, I knew how to pay attention better now. "I think he's considering the offer but he wants to see how much more we can bring. It's almost like he's assessing which partner is worth keeping over the other."
Aiden nodded, continuing, "How much more can we give?"
"Breakeven is at letting them have 27%, so I'd say nothing above 15%."
"Brutal." He grinned, "I trained you well. But I'd go lower. 5%."
I raised a brow.
"Any company in business with the Steeles gets undue credit and advantages their competitors don't."
He might have sounded cocky, but I could see the logic in his words. "Fear is a good motivator, don't you think?" I took a sip from the terrible black coffee their assistant had brought for me. The one I'd had in the hotel hadn't done the job and now I was practically begging for more caffeine. Just not in lukewarm water.
"Not necessary with them, but I'm really proud of myself at this moment." He said, giving me a rare full-blown grin that I wanted to capture and keep engraved in my brain. Just as quickly, he turned away to whisper something in Jason's ear. With translators back in place, the meeting was set to motion one more time. He didn't directly say he's proud of me, but it was as good as a compliment from Mr Steele was getting, so I took it, flipping my hair over my shoulder and sitting straighter in my seat.
Monica was scribbling away in her journal, pages after pages flipping, and I wondered if she knew she didn't have to get things noted verbatim. Jade's handwriting was a neat squiggle, and I looked over the offers that were on the table, trying to do the math in my head simultaneously and figuring out the best possible option.
Jason had opened the negotiations brutally low, at 0.5%, and they'd lost their counteroffers in their mouth it seemed. No one had expected him to lowball it that terribly that it would haunt the men at night. There were hushed whispers again in their end, something about being cruel before they offered to accept our business for a 3% share in the profits.
Fools. You could have had 2% more.
Aiden dropped into the conversation then, talking some rubbish about being longstanding partners in business and noting how Jason was so friendly with them. "It seems to me that Mr Emerson enjoys your hospitality more than he enjoys his job back home."
Bull shit. But where was Aiden going with this? The men laughed with Jason, clasping hands with him like long lost friends.
"Just as the proof of this relationship is strong, and as a thank you for your trust in us, we'll let you have a 5% share in our profits in all businesses in the contract. The men looked at each other in surprise, before shaking hands with Aiden and showering him in compliments.
Smart fucker. He could have taken them at 3% but he would have to come back again the next time a competitor tried to take advantage of our absence. The 2% wasn't a share in profit, but a purchase of loyalty. They offered to buy us lunch, which Aiden accepted gracefully for us. I almost screamed. The shapewear might have been wonderfully pleasing for aesthetic purposes, but I needed to get out of it if I didn't want to throw up all my food.
The restaurant wasn't all that far, and when we reached there, I held on to Jade's hand as I rose from my seat and climbed up the stairs. I really needed to get back to the fucking hotel and get out of this dress.
The women excused ourselves to the washroom, where I complained and cursed the stupid shapewear, trying to hold my composure while Monica and Jade did their business in the stalls.
"Why did you buy something a size smaller?" Jade laughed at my misery.
"It wasn't small, I've just gained weight like crazy this month." And it was true. Turns out eating three square meals a day did change your weight drastically.
"Good for you." Jade elbowed me, "You were all skin and bones when I met you."
"Not true." I shook my head. "I always had a tummy."
"All of us do." Monica rinsed her hands off, drying them off with a paper towel, "it'll get worse after you have children, just you wait."
"How many do you have?" Jade asked, touching up her lipstick again.
"Three. My eldest, Kaylin is nine, Dylan is seven and Harper just turned three." As customary, she showed us a picture of her kids and her husband, and Jade and I couldn't help but coo over it. They were adorable, and I couldn't wait to meet them. Deciding we'd taken long enough, we headed back to the table where the five men were waiting.
Breadsticks were already served at the table and I noticed a wine glass at my seat next to Aiden. Thoughtful, just not always visible.
"I took the liberty of ordering for you. Grilled chicken with mash and veg."
Exactly what I would have ordered. I didn't like experimenting with new foods in unknown places. Damn it, I'm not supposed to fall for this man, but boy does he make it harder every single day.
"Thank you," I took a sip of the wine, delighted by the flavours dancing on my tongue. God that was beautiful. And it would taste better with the mashed potatoes in my belly. Luckily the men carried their conversation well enough that I had no need of participating, nor did I have any will too. I was sleepy, uncomfortable and drugged on carbs. I wanted to get into my hotel room and not show up till tomorrow morning.
We exit the hotel a little past two pm, feeling sated and heavily tired. On the last step down the stairs, my foot miscalculated a step and I nearly tripped, holding on to Aiden's arm for support. He was quick to swoop in and stabilize me, hand going over my waist to prevent the fall. Was it the wine or was it really fucking hot in this city? I muttered a 'thanks' before stepping away from his grip. He still held on to my arm, "Don't fall again."
The men exchanged goodbyes, and the German man with the black skinny tie said to Aiden as a parting note, "Your wife is very beautiful. You should take care of her."
I took my hand away from his as if being electrocuted. WIFE!
"Danke! Sehr aufmerksam." Aiden's German was not nearly fluent, but they seemed to appreciate the effort anyway. We piled into the car and the driver took off. I purposely chose a seat far away from Aiden, resting my head on Jason's shoulder.
"So, Aiden," Jason said as we walked into the hotel lobby, "How does married life suit you?"
Oh my god. Jason would never let us live this down.
"Poorly," Aiden responded. "My wife prefers someone else's company over mine."
"I'd prefer sunshine over dark clouds any day." I shrugged, taking Jason's extended arm and walking ahead with him, laughing about the next wisecrack he had. I got off on the second last floor with the women, relieved that I had two hours of uninterrupted sleep in front of me, and I wasn't going to waste a second of it.
***
I forgot to factor Aiden in.
He'd shown up at my door just to tell me to behave professionally with his CMO, and that I needed to stop being so friendly to him. If Aiden and Jason were cracking jokes, that was their relationship because they were equals. I wasn't.
"Got it." I swallowed, feeling like a child with my hand in the cookie jar. I'd feel so terribly sorry for Aiden's children, whenever he'd have them. He really had no bone of joy in his body.
"Where's your necklace?" He asked, just as he was leaving the room.
"I was about to sleep, needed to take it off." I pointed out the jewellery resting on the bedside table.
"You still haven't told me why it was so important to you."
"It was a gift from someone important," I said, getting into bed, which should have been a clear indication that he needed to leave.
"It seems more than just from someone." Aiden took the liberty to walk further into my room, leaning against the cabinet in front of the bed. "Boyfriend?"
"Girlfriend." I corrected him, hoping that would be the end of the conversation. Of course, it wasn't with Aiden. Nothing ever ended with me having the last word.
"Are you still in touch-"
"She's married now." I cut him off, not wanting to get deeper into the conversation. I had refused myself the privilege of thinking of her for the longest time. The sadness and the nostalgia came over on me again, and I really wished I didn't have to talk about it with anyone, much less anyone with the emotional capacity of a lime. Firsts were always special, and she was special for more than one reason.
"You had a date the other day... with a guy." Aiden's eyes were on the floor, head tilted to the side, but I picked up his cues... he was genuinely interested in knowing.
"And?" I shrugged.
"Nothing," he responded. "Just curious."
He walked over to the windows, staring at the city outside. "Why hold on to something that passed?"
I sat up straighter, figuring if I was on my way to hell, might as well hit rock bottom. "Zara and I were childhood best friends. We were neighbours, same school, same activities, we basically did everything together. I think I spent more time in her house than I did in my own." I snorted, the memories I had buried deep in surfacing again. The smell of saffron and lamb and spices in the kitchen, the piping tea in the evenings and the days when we were lucky enough to be blessed with kheer. "We were 16 when I figured what I wanted. Zara actually kissed me first, randomly during a movie night. We hid our relationship from her parents for a whole year or something." One year, seven months and twenty-four days.
"The day we graduated high school; we were hanging out in my backyard. It started raining and we were soaked." A small smile came on my lips, remembering the last day I saw her, "I don't even remember how it happened," Lie, I remembered every second of it, "but her father saw us kissing from their kitchen window."
A tear slipped down my face. Some memories were just hard to remember again no matter how much time would pass.
"They got her married to some guy in Dubai a week later. I was due to start NYU in the fall, but I moved months earlier. It was a lot to take in for an eighteen-year-old clueless child. My parents informed me that the family moved back to India a few months later. I've never visited home since."
"Have you contacted her since then?"
"I found her on Instagram once. She has two children, and her husband looks good with her." I shrugged, trying to play off how much all of this affected me.
"And you contacted her?"
"Is there any point?" I lay back in bed, staring at the ceiling, "She's moved on, I've moved on. I'm pretty sure she hates me anyway."
"You can't say that with so much certainty." Aiden clicked his tongue.
"She wanted to become a dancer. She basically lived and breathed Broadway and I've sentenced her to a home life with kids she never wanted. I'm pretty sure she hates me for it."
"Thea." Aiden's tone was stern as he moved from his spot, settling on the bed near my feet. "No one forced her in that relationship. No one forced her to kiss you that day. Both of you are faultless in this."
"It's easy to say that, Aiden." I shrugged, which was a difficult thing to do while lying down, "I still feel guilty."
"Have you dated anyone since?"
I nodded, "Ryan was sweet and whatever, but he wanted us to move to Oregon someday of all places, and I just wasn't about that life. The first day I spent in New York, I was in love. I just didn't want to live a small-town life again."
Enough questions about me.
"What about you?"
"What about me?" He raised a brow.
"This isn't fair. I literally told you my deepest, darkest secret and you won't tell me anything?"
Aiden shrugged uncomfortably, "Is it necessary for everyone to have a moment in their life that defines who they are? I've had a very regular life. Parents are always good to each other; my sister and I bicker just as any regular sibling pair does. I went to Harvard, where I had a good group of friends. I'm still in touch with most of them. Then I took over the company. What else is there to tell?"
"Any relationships?" I probed.
"One, right when I was beginning to take up responsibilities from Dad. She didn't like the fact that I didn't have a work-life balance. She cut her losses and left." Aiden looked completely unbothered as if her presence and absence in life were all the same to him. Sheesh.
"How are you so practical even when it comes to love?" I checked the time and sat up straighter, groaning. We had a dinner to attend with some people and I had to start getting ready in thirty minutes. Goodbye sleep.
"Why can't love be practical too? Is it not love if it gives you comfort and familiarity instead of wrecking your sanity?"
How did he answer me and ask me a question at the same time? What the actual fuck was this man? But he made sense too.
"I guess you expect the maddening love they have in fiction?"
"I don't know," I muttered, "It'll be nice to know someone would let the world burn to keep me happy."
"I â Someone could do that without burning the world down," Aiden noted.
"Einstein," I rolled my eyes, "Of course I didn't mean it literally. I just like the whole hearts and flowers and serenading at 3 am business, so sue me if I expect some romance in my relationship."
Aiden whispered something under his breath that I missed because of the sharp ringing on my phone. Jade was calling.
"Can I borrow your flat iron for Monica? I don't know what the hell wrong with hers but it isn't heating up at all."
"Sure. I'll get it to your room, give me five minutes." I disconnected the line and walked over to my suitcase, locating my flatiron.
"I'm going to get ready for dinner," I said to Aiden, and he was finally able to take the hint, leaving my room with a strict reminder to be ready in time.
I can't remember who was the first to comment they wanted a chapter from Aiden's point of view, but I can tell you that I am your fairy godmother and your wish has been granted :) Friday can't come soon enough xD
p.s. if there's a single comment that's talking shit about Thea's sexuality, I will literally murder you. (For legal reasons, this is a joke). But seriously, it's 2021. We don't talk shit about anyone's sexuality. Shut up, bye.