As I spent time with Nagi and my wife, I began to realize something.
I began to feel affection for Nagi.
When she won an award in Japanese dance, I was as happy as if it were my own. I was also happy when she reported that she was beginning to enjoy the tea ceremony and flower arrangement, which she had said she did not enjoy much at first.
And I thought to myself,
I wanted her to live freely.
I want her to do what she loves and enjoy her life. I donât want to impose my dreams and my work on her.
I donât want to tie her down. Fortunately, I have plenty of money. I can let her do what she wants to do.
By the time I thought that, it was too late.
Little by little, the smile faded from Nagiâs face. Because of what I said.
I talked to my wifeâ¦.and she got angry at me. I looked for a way to get back to normal.
âBut it was no use.
I remember strongly what my parents said to me when I was a child. And I had told Nagi the same thing over and over again.
âNagi. Is there anything else you want to do?â
âNot in particular, because Iâm enjoying my practice right now.â
She didnât act like a child even though she is. â¦â¦And the distance between us naturally became empty.
Iâm not good enough. I asked Chie to tell her that it was okay to spend time like before.
âHowever, it was useless.
âBut then, I wonât be like you, Father.â
Inside her. My presence had become too big.
Still, I managed to persuade her. But Nagi had gotten into the habit of hiding her emotions.
Before I knew it, she was back to normal.
Ah, we are not good enough. I thought so.
By the time she entered elementary school, her appearance hadnât changed.
âI donât know who said it, but Nagi was called [Ice Princess]. It was around this time when she was called that.
I had sent her to a private school where kids from good places went, but I felt it was not a good sign.
She isolate herself from her surroundings. She would be alone.
Then it would be better to send her to a normal school.
If someone else comes along who can entertain Nagi, not us, it might change things.
I talked about it with my wife. When I proposed to change schools, Nagi accepted it easily.
âBut. Even there, I became a hindrance.
Her father was a great man, and if she did anything bad, her parents would lose their job.
It wasnât long before rumors began to circulate. Of course I would not do such a thing.
But, it was no good. â¦.It all backfired.
Soon, I didnât know how to deal with my daughter, whoâs life was ruined by me. Family conversation was also decreased.
â¦â¦Because of that.
âââ
âChildren learn common sense from their parents. I was unaware of that obvious fact. â¦â¦ Eventually, Nagi grew up. I heard that when you reach puberty you start to dislike your father and you shouldnât have conversations with him, thatâs what I thoughtâno. In the end I was just running away.â
Soichiro sanâs face was distorted as he said that.
âIt will get better someday, it doesnât have to be solved right now. I ran away to work. Leave Nagi to the people at home.â
â¦â¦Then, for years, Nagi remained like that.
Soichiro san stared at me.
âRecently, Nagi has been going outside more and more. I felt that it was a good sign. But this time, too, without much conversation. I thought that Nagiâs life would be more enjoyable if there was someone who could be her fiancé and friend. I had pushed my selfish thought that she would be happy. â¦.I didnât even notice the changes in my daughter.â
Soichiro san stared at me.
âIâm sorry, Minori kun. Iâm sorry for giving my daughter and you a hard time.â
I have my own thoughts after hearing what you just said. But this is not something I should say.
âPlease apologize to Nagi san, not to me. And please make up with her. That is my wish.â
My mouth naturally relaxed.
âYou can still start over. She loves her parents more than anyone else.â
If she could spend time with her parents again as she did in the past. Iâm sure Nagi would be happy too.
âPlease make up with her and treat her as you used to. â¦â¦Please.â
âI understand. Right awayââ
Just when Soichiro san was about to stand up.
âI heard everything. Father.â
The sliding door leading to another room opened.
At that moment, I gulped.
ââ¦â¦.â
There was Nagi, wearing a kimono.
Her skin was a little whiter than usual. It made Nagiâs skin and face more beautiful and attractive.
The hair was pulled back in the same way as when she was dancing. â¦Itâs tied with a hairpin and blue jade ball on the top.
And the kimono. Nagiâs innocence was emphasized by the luxurious-looking kimono with the white lilies drawn on it.
ââDid you heard that? Nagi. Chie.â
âIâm sorry. I was waiting for the right moment to enter.â
I was taken aback by such an exchange. I regained consciousness.
âNo. â¦â¦Either way, I was going to tell Nagi the same thing. It saves me a lot of trouble, so itâs fine.â
Soichiro san said so. He looked at them.
âLetâs talk. Nagi, Chie. Please sit down.â
They nodded to Soichiro sanâs words. They sat down next to him.
âAh, thatâs right. I have to introduce Minori kun to you, Chie.â
ââYes. But actually, I already heard from Nagi.â
The one whoâs called âChieâ from a while ago is probably Nagiâs mother.
With beautiful black hair in a ponytail, she has a neat appearance.
Sheâs very beautiful. Sheâs so beautiful that I can believe her even if she is said to be in her late twenties like Soichiro san.
âOkay, once again. Nice to meet you. My name is Shinonome Chie, Nagiâs mother. â¦â¦Thank you so much for taking care of Nagi.â
âN-no. Iâm also quite indebted to Nagi san. Ah, Iâ¦..am Minori Souta.â
As I said so, Chie san chuckled.
âYou donât have to use honorifics. Letâs get back to the topic.â
Chie san said so. She looked at Soichiro san.
ââNagi.â
âYes.â
Soichiro san stared at Nagi.
Then, he put his hand on the floor. He bowed his head.
âIâm really sorry until now. I donât even know where to start. I have ruined Nagiâs life.â
ââ¦â¦Father.â
Nagi looked at Soichiro san. And smiled softly.
âFather, please lift up your head. I love Father and Mother. Therefore, even if you say that you saw me as a tool. â¦â¦I was surprised, but not upset.â
âNagi.â
Chie san hugged Nagi from behind.
ââ¦â¦Iâm sorry I made you into such a child that you canât even say a single selfish thing.â
Chie sanâs expression was so painful.
âIâm sorry that I didnât notice it. But Soichiro san and Iâ¦â¦no. Me and your father are also thinking about you first now, Nagi. â¦â¦Because we only think about Nagiâs happiness.â
Chie sanâs hands hugged Nagi even tighter. Soichiro san raised his head. He looked at Nagi.
âYeah. What we want from Nagi. â¦.We think that itâs important for Nagi to find happiness. Nagiâs happiness is our happiness. âSo, I want to ask you again.â
Soichiro sanâs pitch black, straight eyes pierced through Nagi.
âTodayâs marriage proposal. Does it really make you happy, Nagi?â
Nagi stared at him.
She turned her gaze to me.
Finally, she looked at me.
Just like that, Nagi returned her gaze.
ââ¦â¦ Father, this marriage proposal is what I wanted from the bottom of my heart. There is no doubt about that.
She said so. I involuntarily turned my head and clenched my fists.
ââBut.â
To the words that follow. I looked at Nagi.
âIf itâs possible. I would like to talk with Souta kun again.â
The expression on her face. She was smiling softly but looked somewhat pained.
âââ
Soichiro san and the others went to another room. Now itâs just me and Nagi in this room.
âI have a lot of things to say. But I want to ask you one thing first.â
Nagi looked at me quietly.
ââWhy did you come here?â
âWhy?â
I repeated her words. I stared at Nagi.
âTo make Nagi happy.â
If I had to put it in one word, it would be this.
Nagiâs eyes widened at my wordsâ¦..and she turned her head.
âI hurt Souta kun.â
âYou did it to make your family happy. You didnât do it with malice intention.â.
âI betrayed you, Souta kun.â
âItâs true that I was hurt. But Iâm back on my feet now. âNagi.â
I called out for Nagi, and she turned to me.
ââ¦â¦Rather than me. Iâm sure a suitable girl for Souta kun will come someday.â
âIâm happier with Nagi rather than with someone whose face I donât know yet.â
Nagiâs expression was distorted little by little.
âI-I mean. I mightâ¦.betray Souta kun again. Itâs possible, you know?â
âNo, you wonât. Thereâs no reason for you to betray me again. Nagiâs parents are both good people. They know about me. So, itâll be fine. Moreoverâ¦â¦â
To Nagi. I smiled at her.
âThis incident has left a deep scar on Nagiâs heart as well as mine. The guilt and self-loathing of betraying others. Now that you understand that, You wonât betray me anymore, Nagi.â
Nagi is a very kind girl. I think she was attacked by self-hatred terribly.
But thatâs why. Itâs okay.
Nagi turned her head down and muttered
ââ¦.Iâm such a stupid girl.â
After that, she looked up.
ââItâs not just Souta kun. â¦In the end, itâs no exaggeration to say that I betrayed my parents.â
âWe just crossed paths. We can start all over the place.â
âBesides, I rejected Souta kun.
âIt wasnât from the bottom of your heart. You just had to do so. â¦â¦Your face at that time told me so.â
âIâm half-hearted in everything. I might hurt Souta kun again.â
âThen letâs both heal together. No matter how many times Nagi hurts me, I will never leave you. I promise.â
ââ¦..I donât want to hurt Souta kun.â
âI know. Thatâs why I can change. Nagi is a girl who can grow up. Even though your English was not good at first, you got a perfect score.â
Nagiâs expression is getting more and more distorted.
âIâIââ
Her cheeks were distorted.
âIs it okay for me to be happy?â
âOf course.â
Straight. I looked into Nagiâs eyes to make sure she understood.
âI will definitely make you happy, even if you donât ask for it.â
I stood up and went next to Nagi.
Nagi looked at me with big tears.
âNagi.â
ââ¦â¦Yes.â
I put my hand in front of Nagiâs.
âWill you go out with me with marriage in mind?â
Nagi looked at me, crying.
ââYes.â
She took my hand.
I pulled her hand, stood her up and hugged her.
ââ¦Sorry, Iâm sorry, Souat kun. I hurt you a lot.â
ââ¦Yeah. Itâs fine. Right now, Iâm very happy.â
The warmth of Nagiâs body heat is felt directly.
ââ¦â¦.And, thank you. For still liking me.â
Nagi smiled at me, though she was still in tears.
âYouâre welcome.â
Nagiâs small hand squeezed my back and hugged me tightly.
ââI love you, Souta kun. I love you more than anyone else.
âMe too. â¦.I love you.â
Nagi removed her face from my chest. She looked at me.
I moved my face close to hersâ
I put my lips on hers.
ââ¦â¦â
ââ¦â¦â
We looked at each other silently. Her beautiful face was right in front of meâ¦â¦
Just like this. I put her lips on top of Nagiâs.
ââ¦â¦Souta kun.â
âWhat is it?â
Nagiâs eyes, as blue as the ocean floor, looked at me softly.
âAbsolutely, absolutely. I will make Souta kun happy too. âI will never betray you again.
ââ¦â¦Yeah.â
I nodded to Nagiâs words. I put my lips on hers again.
âWe will be happy together.â
â⦠Iâm already very happy, though.â
âMore. Iâm going to be happier from now on.â
Saying that, I hugged her as she smiled and left a bit.
Suddenly, there was a pause. I was struck by sleepiness and fell unconscious.