Chapter 42: Vicious Bonds: Chapter 42

“What is that pill you keep taking?” Willow asks.

We’ve stopped to rest, and it’s a good stopping point because Ripple Hills is only a few miles away. I chug down some water after taking two red tablets.

Why do you care?” I ask after a gasp.

“You’ve been taking them every day since I met you.”

“They help me.”

“With what?”

“For the love of Vakeeli, could you stop asking so many bloody questions?” Fuck, she talks too much. It’s astounding she’s not tired of her own voice. I swear she’s no better than Juniper. It’s no wonder they’ve gotten along so well.

“If I don’t ask questions, how the hell am I supposed to know anything? You forget I’m in a new world, with new rules and terrifying shit around every corner.” She rolls her eyes.

She has a point. But still.

With a sigh, she presses her back to the trunk of a tree and slides her eyes down to the white wolf beside her. I still can’t wrap my mind around that damn thing. I mean, if my mother had planned this so far in advance, why didn’t she warn me? Why didn’t she tell me some woman would fall out of the sky and I’d be chained to her forever? I wish she were here…

I look up, and Willow is staring at me. Shit. I hope she didn’t hear me. I draw in a breath and exhale, making sure the wall around my mind is sealed tight.

When she says, “I don’t understand why you’re so bitter,” I assume she didn’t hear me because she’s still stuck on my last question, which I admit was rather rude.

“I’m not bitter.”

“You really are,” she laughs, but with hardly any humor. She pauses then, her head moving into a slight tilt. “Is there a reason for all the scars on your body?”

I dig into my bag, pulling out a pouch of green nuts. Snatching out a handful, I stuff them into my mouth.

“I’ll answer your question about the red tablets instead,” I say around a mouthful.

“Okay.” She sits up taller, giving me her undivided attention. I let the quiet steep a bit before speaking again.

“I have a thing about people touching me.” I clear my throat before popping more nuts into my mouth. “I don’t like people’s hands on my skin. Never have. The red tablets were made by Mythics, for people like me. People who are extremely sensitive to touch.”

She nods, as if she understands, but I have a feeling she doesn’t. Her brows are puckered, her eyes pleading for a clearer answer. I look past her at a thin tree with thorns on its branches.

“I’m not sure why I was born that way, but I was. When someone touches me, it’s not a normal sensation for me like it is for everyone else. It doesn’t bring me comfort, and it doesn’t soothe me. Instead, I’m hyperaware of the touch, and at first it just made my skin crawl. But as I got older…well, anyone’s touch would hurt, and it made me angry.”

“Wow.” She blinks. “I wonder why that is.”

“Just does.” I’m not about to tell her anything more than that. There’s a deeper reason for my anger, and it has nothing to do with being touched. Besides, there’s no need for her to know so much. I put up my wall, making sure none of the thoughts slip out for her to hear.

She nods again, lowering her gaze. I chomp a few more nuts, side-eying her.

“That’s why you cover yourself up.”

“I suppose. It’s still annoying having people touch my clothes, but at least it’s not my skin.”

“That must suck.”

I say nothing to that.

“But you’ve touched me several times,” she says. “Once at that insane party in Vanora, and when we were escaping Beatrix’s. You carried me the whole way.”

“I had no choice.”

“Did it not hurt for you to hold me?”

I remain quiet, mulling it over. Truthfully, it didn’t hurt. It was almost instinct to carry her and get her to safety. I didn’t think twice about whether it would hurt me or not.

“I suppose it didn’t.”

“So…maybe there are exceptions.”

Yeah, with her, it seems.

“Maybe that’s why you’re so bitter,” she goes on. “You don’t let anyone embrace or hold you. Comfort you.”

“I prefer it when people stay away from me.”

“Why do you want everyone away?” Her question catches me off guard, and the curiosity of it burns in her eyes. She truly wants an answer, but I have none to give. Well, none I want to voice out loud.

I stand up, collecting my bag. “Gotta take a piss. Once I’m back, we’ll move out.”

Ripple Hills