Max
At midnight, the creak of the shed door next to home broke my concentration. I lifted my focus from the guts of my damaged bike to find my brother entering.
âFor fuckâs sake, Max. Iâve been searching everywhere for ye. Ye werenât here an hour ago.â
I shrugged, returning my gaze to the repair. âCongratulations on finding me.â
Maddock and I had only recently reset our relationship. It had taken a long time for me not to be angry at him over Lia. But right now, he was the last person I wanted to see.
His boots clumped on the grease-stained concrete floor. âWhat the fuck happened to your arm?â
After the accident, Iâd wheeled my broken bike home, stowing it here in the shed. I still lived with our parents, and both had been inside our cottage, warm light spilling from the windows into the fresh late afternoon. They were readying to leave for a few days away. But talking to anyone had been out of the question.
Instead, Iâd peeled off my shredded jacket and examined my arm, teasing gravel from where it had embedded in my skin.
A longer gash bled a stream, needing stitches.
Without a jacket, and with icy rain pelting me, Iâd walked the twenty minutes to Castle McRae, my Uncle Callum and Aunt Mathildaâs home. The place was undergoing renovation, and Callum stalked about outside, barking orders. Heâd taken one look at me, jutted a finger in the direction of his car, then driven me to get my wound stitched. The huge man was my fatherâs eldest brother and chief of our clan. We lived on his land, and I was used to his no-nonsense ways.
I also suspected I was his favourite nephew, though heâd never said.
Once a nurse had cleaned and repaired the damage, bandaging me from wrist to elbow, Callum had driven me back to the estate. In his gruff way, he made a demand of me.
âIf someone hurt ye, we willnae let them get away with it. If ye hurt yourself, learn from the lesson.â
He hadnât offered me a solution for if it had been both those things.
I glowered at Maddock and set down the smashed brake Iâd just stripped. âDoes it matter?â
âAye. Iâve been worried, and here ye are injured and with a broken bike. Was there an accident? Rory and I have been trying to call ye.â
âIâm naw in the mood for talking.â
The single spotlight cut shadows over his face. âFine, but thereâs shite I need to say.â
I let out a laugh that was more of a jeer. âIs there?â
I was being an arsehole, but I couldnât help it. And yet this was none of Maddockâs fault. Breathing through my nose, I regarded him. âTalk now. Howâs Rory handling this?â
âSheâs shocked for ye, and sorry for how it went down. Neither of us suspected this.â
The real question was a jagged piece of glass to my gut. âNo, I mean how will she handle it if the bairnâs yours?â
Maddock swallowed. âThatâs part of why Iâve been trying to find ye. When ye were with Lia, did ye use protection?â
My heart gave one big thump. In the short few hours Iâd known of the babyâs existence, I hadnât been able to look at her picture. There was no doubt she was a McRae, but there was every doubt over which of us was her da.
I hated with violence the notion that it could be my brother.
âNo,â I answered.
My twin paled but kept his gaze on mine. âI did. Sheâs yours.â
My legs shook, and I locked my knees to hide it. âFor real?â I managed.
âAye. I always used condoms before Rory. After ye went off on your bike, chasing Lia, Rory and I talked it through, and thatâs what we worked out. If ye hadnât, then case closed. I need to text my lass.â He snatched up his phone and wrote a fast message.
Tension held me tight, my mind a million miles away in a place where Iâd somehow had a child with Lia.
âCondoms sometimes fail. She could still be yours,â I found myself saying.
Maddock flattened his lips. âNaw in my mind. Congratulations, Daddy. See ye tomorrow.â
On that, he walked away, leaving me even more of a mess.
At two AM, and in a now-empty house, I washed up then threw myself into bed. In the dark, I rotated my phone in my hands. I had Liaâs number from where sheâd drop-called me, and I stared at it.
In our short and turbulent history, we hadnât actually exchanged numbers. It had been Liaâs idea not to share personal details. Sheâd only been in the city for a few weeks. There had been no point in getting to know each other in any detail. At first, Iâd been happy to go along with it. A game, a tease.
But that had all changed as the end of our time approached.
I drove out every morning to see her, this yellow-haired girl. I showed her the city. I even borrowed a car to take her to Edinburgh for the day. Anything for her smile. At nineteen, Iâd been young and extremely dumb.
Her timid and tender kiss had overturned my previous experience, leaving only her in my mind. Iâd suspected her to be a virgin so I hadnât pushed for more. But on the drive back from the Edinburgh trip, a few days before she was due to leave, sheâd taken matters into her own hands. Weâd made love in the back seat of the car.
I told her I wanted to keep her.
Christ, I didnât want to remember this shite.
The next day, nothing had changed. She held the line sheâd drawn on day one. She was leaving, and there was nothing I could do to change that. Though sheâd wanted to stay friends.
My phone light extinguished, leaving me in the dark.
This was the point where Iâd made an epic mistake. So cut up was I from her refusal to try to continue our relationship, I broke things off. My pride had been hurt. It had always been bigger than other peopleâs. I had none of Maddockâs even temper. No chill when it came to things I cared about. People I cared about.
And in leaving Lia for the last couple of days of her stay, Iâd enabled the encounter with my brother.
I balled up my fist and thumped the mattress.
Of all the things that could have happened. That heâd walk in to the same bar she was in. Her hotel, I presumed. Not that Iâd ever asked for details.
What a fuck-up.
I badly needed to know how that had gone down. The moment Maddock confessed, Iâd decided that Lia had targeted him. That out of spite, sheâd fucked my brother to fuck me over, the boy whoâd argued with her then cut her off.
That truth was easier to believe than the alternative. Yet my two short conversations with Lia had forced me to rethink.
Tension chased over my muscles.
Then there was the question of the bairn. I reached for my jeans, tossed to the floor, and extracted the picture. Snapping on my lamp, I let myself take a first full look. With her face tilted as she beamed at the person behind the camera, the bairn had her motherâs smile and curls but my colouring.
A bonny wee thing.
âEvie,â I said to the dark of my room.
Without letting myself question it further, I snagged my phone and saved Lia as a contact then wrote a message.
Max: Can we talk tomorrow?
A reply came before the screen had even dimmed.
Evieâs ma: Tell me where to meet, and Iâll come to you.
My deep pull of air did nothing to steady my skipping pulse. This time, Iâd be prepared for whatever Lia had to say. She wouldnât blindside me again. But I had new information for her.
If I could step around the shards of my broken heart, Iâd try to get better answers in the next meeting.
I sent a location with no degree of guilt over what I had to do.
It was the only way to get to the truth.