NOTE: A lot of stuff has been happening but I will try my best to continue on writing the chapters. I had some specials planned but sadly my mental health did not allow me to proceed with them. I love you guys, take care!
NOTE 2: I am writing this one after a month. I am sorry for not uploading anything. However trust me that I have some AO3 type of reasons for it. I promise I will try being more consistent after my finals are done!
---
Gray.
My first thought as I woke up and looked at the ceiling.
That's not the color of my room.
This one was bright, the sun peaking through the window. It made me question just how long was I asleep. And what exactly happened the day before?
I looked around the room, there wasn't much in here. Just a few pieces of furniture, one for clothes and the other I could guess for personal belongings, as well as some knifes hanging off a rack for jackets. It reminded me of König's room, it was similarly empty and... sad... except a bit of danger spiked the air.
I was all alone, the warmth that engulfed me through the night was long gone and only then did I start to remember the events from yesterday.
The once warm embrace that had carried me to bed, the hands that massaged my body and cleaned it from any unwanted liquids. The sweet whispers still playing in the back of my head, reminding me of the precious way that someone handled me.
And what has happened that made me unable to take care of myself in the first place.
I quickly got up, throwing the sheets off of me, the sweet cologne I seemed to now be able to recognize filled my sense of smell. I walked into the bathroom and wiped the fog that covered the mirror, I looked at my once clear skin, now I could barely find it among the marks. The hickeys and bites adorned it. Placed all over my neck, collar bone, going all the way to my thighs, my fingers running along all the teeth marks and scratches, I could tell them apart just by memory alone.
I was so focused on the bites and bruises that my brain didn't even process why the mirror was fogged in the first place. Hot hands slid under the shirt I was wearing, making me shiver but also lean into their touch.
"Couldn't wait until I was finished?"
I was pulled away from the mirror as golden locks filled the crook of my neck, the soft nibbling on my skin making me let out a gasp. The warm arms wrapped around me, holding me close, preventing me from moving.
"Or did you wanted to take a peak? You know I will let you see my body any time..."
I couldn't even form a proper sentence at this point, I was slightly too overwhelmed by what was happening. The events of the previous night still replaying in my mind.
"Unless... it was my face you wanted to see?"
His voice got lower, but not in the affectionate kind of way. He still wasn't comfortable with me seeing his face.
"Ghost?"
I finally managed to get a word out, making him freeze all his actions. Maybe a realization of sorts has hit him.
"Did you not know I was here?"
"No..."
He had a towel wrapped around his waist, but every other inch of his body was exposed to my eyes. All except his face. He buried his head in my neck, not letting me see anything else other then his hair and I couldn't stop myself from reaching my hand over to it.
I ran my fingers through the slight curls, relishing in how soft they had felt on my skin. I felt like I was petting a freshly washed golden retriever. Except Ghost was nothing like a golden retriever, König was closer to acting like a dog then him, yet I knew both of them would bring me a bone if I asked.
"Sorry... should I go?"
"Don't want to join me?"
Well that was certainly a surprise.
"What about the mask?"
He just let out a low chuckle and it sent shivers down my spine.
"Too bad you reminded me about it, sweetheart."
"I want to-"
"Too late."
That motherfucker was teasing me! He was doing all this on purpose. God damn him and his attractiveness! They had their fun yesterday, now it was my time to push him against the wall.
"And how do you plan on keeping your face hidden?"
He wants to play with me, then I will play with him.
Ghost kept quiet and suddenly a hand was placed over my eyes.
"Simon-!"
I was pressed into him further.
"Quiet."
He breathed heavily against my ear, and I honestly folded. The thoughts of putting him in his place now gone from my mind. This was the first time he has ever acted this rough towards me and it made me wish that something would happen. His hand slowly moved down from my stomach to the spot between my legs.
"Wait for me outside, okay?"
He stopped suddenly as if knowing exactly that it would drive me crazy.
"Okay..."
"Good girl."
I could hear the smile in his voice, the raspy whisper of his send my heart beating more then any of my fantasies ever could. I walked out of the bathroom more red then when I had been before walking in. I wasn't embarrassed, at least that's what I tried to tell myself. I sat down on his bed and waited for him patiently.
My mind drifted off to König, wondering where he was. My heart hurt a little as a thought that he would leave without a proper goodbye crept into my mind.
He wouldn't do that, would he?
I shook my head. He was too much of a pet to do that.
---
I looked at my breakfast not even wanting to play with the food, my eyes shifted to the fork that laid on my tray. I picked it up but instead of eating I spun it between my fingers.
"You have to eat something."
I huffed. Of course I knew that. But that didn't change the fact that my anger washed away any type of appetite I had.
"How could he just leave! And not even say a single bye at that!? I understand work and all but he could have woken me up!"
I crossed my arms and leaned them on the table. I heard a small snicker and I snapped my head in the direction of the sound.
Soap.
"Something funny, Sergeant?"
He looked at me surprised and raised his hands in defense.
"Not at all, Colonel!"
His shocked face disappeared and was replaced by a cheesy smile.
"Just never thought I would see you so distressed."
"Distressed? You think I am distressed? You have yet to see me be anything more then upset."
"Whatever you say, Miss."
Soap got up, took his now empty tray and walked off. He had already finished his food a while ago, he had simply stuck around to poke fun at me.
"I promise, once I see him I will attach a leash onto his neck."
Ghost looked at me with a curious expression, he has been quiet all this time, his hand rubbing circles on my thigh. To my surprise it actually made me feel better.
"Are you going to put a leash on me as well?"
The rough whisper send a shiver down my spine. His voice was like a forgotten melody, especially when he spoke so calmly.
"Only if I need to."
I whispered back. Never in my life did I think I would be saying this to Ghost. The first time I saw him I was set on keeping out of his way which... of course, ended badly and not as I planned in the slightest.
He chuckled taking me out of my thoughts, I looked his way wondering what he was laughing at.
"Won't you need a collar first?"
This question alone made me smile, he got comfortable enough to joke around with me.
"Are you proposing I get you a custom one?"
He raised his eyebrow at me, clearly surprised by my sudden playfulness. My mood seemed so easy to shift for the past couple of days, now that I think about it I have been more emotional as well.
"A custom collar? You are funny. No way I am letting you put that on me."
"I'm not asking for your permission."
My sharp voice made his pupils turn small, I couldn't place my finger whether they shook from fear or excitement. Maybe from both.
"If I want to put you an a leash, a collar is what you will wear."
The sight of his now stiff body, not knowing what to answer with, was quite funny to me. He always had a remark or comeback to send my way and yet... a single word about a collar on his neck and he shuts down.
"Don't worry. I'm just joking."
"With you I can never be too sure..."
He tried to laugh it off and resume on caressing my thigh, but I could see that something was off.
"Does it make you uncomfortable? Me wanting to keep an eye on both of you?"
"Hmm..."
His hand snaked around my waist and carefully brought me closer.
"If you put it that way..."
His breath hit my neck, making something in me stir up. He whispered into my ear, his voice low, obviously trying to intimidate me.
"Then I want you to wear one too."
---
The snow outside made me shiver just from looking at it, I was so happy that we have been put on winter break. I couldn't imagine going to train in this horrid weather, not even our winter clothes could put up with that.
I took out the tray out of the oven, the smell of freshly baked cookies filled the kitchen. I was allowed to use the kitchen cafeteria to make my own food, which I couldn't lie, delighted me. I haven't cooked in a really long time so I may have forgotten a few things, however that didn't stop Ghost from watching me run around the kitchen.
"You look like a headless chicken."
He chuckled, he wasn't even helping me. He stole one of the freshly baked cookies, only being able to hold it because of his gloves.
"And you look like a freeloader."
"Hey. You were the one who said they didn't need help."
A small dinner. That's what we all have agreed on. Each of us was supposed to take care of one thing. Decorations, cleaning, cooking and drinks. Of course Price was going to be the one getting some alcohol, Soap got to decorate the main room of 141, Gaz and Ghost got stuck on cleaning duty.
I got food. Soap was supposed to help me, however he was no where to be seen. Instead I had Ghost keeping me company, even if he wasn't of much help at least I wasn't alone. I did manage to snatch a radio for some of my own entertainment, of course there was currently nothing else then Christmas songs playing but that didn't seem to bother me too much.
I took the second tray that I had already prepared with the cookies, all ready to jump into the oven and I placed it in. I closed the door and set the timer while checking if the temperature was still correct.
"So you can bake and cook? I didn't think you would be that efficient as well..."
"Did you just compliment me? What happened to the always grumpy and never allowing someone close type of Simon?"
"I told I would treat you better..."
I could hear him mumbling something so I came up around the counter and hugged him from behind.
"I am just teasing you. Thank you. It's sweet coming from you, baby."
He froze when he heard the nickname, but still slowly leaned into my touch. I guessed that even if he does like me then he isn't exactly ready to trust me fully.
Even after all this talking and begging of his, he still has problems with my affection.
"Do you not like when I hug you?"
"I like it..."
Fuck. Was he just shy? I wish I could see his face but the mask, it blocked all of his reactions that I so strongly seek. I could only imagine how his cheeks would turn red, or how his awkward smile could look like.
"Or was it the nick name?"
I whisper into his ear, hoping to make him more flustered. Now that we agreed on dating, I could fuck around with him without having to worry about consequences.
"I'm not really use-"
The alarm on the oven ringed and I heard Ghost sigh as I made my way to it. I carefully started to open the door, moving away while I did so as to not burn my eyebrows off.
"What were you saying?"
I urged him to continue, but as he opened his mouth Soap had burst into the kitchen. Talk about wrong timing.
"Does the scary snake need some help?"
"Call me that one more time and I-"
"She is doing just fine Johnny."
Soap looked quite delighted to hear that, he was just looking for an excuse to get some free time. I carried the hot tray to the plate of cookies and started taking them off the baking paper.
"Then if I will be in my room if I am needed."
"Actually..."
They both looked at me, Soaps smile gone, however he still looked polite. He was dead wrong if he thought I would let him go off with the easiest work, he had to help a bit more, even if it was a little.
"You two could decorate the cookies."
Now that surprised Ghost.
"Me too?"
"Yes. You too Ghost."
He grumbled under his breath, not very happy with my proposition. Either way he complied and moved the cookies even closer to him and Soap.
"And no more snacking on them."
I said sternly.
"Wait, so Ghost was allowed to try them but I am not?"
"I want there to be enough for everyone and you are a sugar vacuum."
I smiled, not wanting to sound too mean. I focused on rolling another portion of the dough while Ghost grabbed a box with the sugar markers. I snickered at how small they looked in his hands.
I never thought that the man knew how to be gentle with his strength. I was proved right as a loud popping sound was heard through the room.
I immediately looked their way startled by the sudden noise.
Only to see Soap crying from laughing and Ghost who has squeezed one of the pens bit too much, causing the plastic tube to break and let most of the sugar to burst out and cover his hands and clothes.
After that incident Simon became quiet, not speaking a single word until we have all headed in for the night. I was standing right before my door while Ghost went to his own room, I was too tired to question his mood until I started getting into bed.
"Did he... just leave me?"
I got a little upset so I spun around and made my way into his room. Simon has already changed his clothes, laying in bed with a book in his hands.
He was reading?
"Is that more interesting then me?"
He looked surprised that I would even ask such a thing. I felt as if something took over me as I walked over to him, I could already see his soft side pushing to the surface, the way he needed reassurance turned me on. It made me want to pet him and keep him close.
I looked at the book but it had a blank cover?. I never took him as a reading type, I also have never seen any books in his room before so wondered what it might be.
"What are you reading?"
"Just some old military records..."
What a good liar he was, except it was too easy to guess that it was not just some records. Maybe his diary or journal? Either way, a perfect opportunity to tease him over it. I sat down on the edge of the bed, making him shift in his spot, he closed the book and placed it on his night stand.
"Tired?"
My hand found it's way to his thigh, slowly moving up and down, caressing him. He cleared his throat and sat up more straight, causing my hand to end up on his knee.
"You have been so quiet... and then you just left me."
"I left you?"
"I thought you wanted to spend more time alone with me."
"I thought you were tired"
"So? Does that give you the right to just keep quiet and leave?"
I started to move my hand up once again, brushing my fingers against his thigh and stopping at his abdomen, slowly climbing onto his bed, bringing my face closer to his.
"Good boys... They answer when they are asked."
"No... Sorry..."
"I'm your Colonel, don't forget that."
I whispered into his ear and it seemed to send a shiver down his body.
"I am the only one who can give you that permission. Understood?"
"Yes..."
"Yes what?"
"Yes, Ma'am."
I smiled at how easily I could make him submit in times like these.
"Come on then. Your bed is bigger."
I could see him getting stiff but soon enough he relaxed as I placed my hips on top of his, straddling him underneath me. His hands moved to my waist, holding me against him.
"Did I allow you to touch?"
My chuckle made him look at me with a softer look.
"Come on, let's sleep."
I was thrown onto the bed and he found himself next to me as quickly. Arms wrapping all around me and bringing me close, not even letting me protest. I didn't even bother, knowing that he wasn't going to let me go any time soon.
"There, there... Is it the nightmares again?"
It seems that just like me, nothing could help stop them. Although I have noticed mine didn't show up as much ever since I started sleeping with him.
"I want you close... Ma'am."
"I want you close as well, baby."
---
"What are you doing here?"
A sense of deja vu washed over me, as the behemoth of the man stood in front of me.
"Ghost called me. Our team was passing by, I thought it would be nice to see you."
I could feel the smile slowly tugging on my lips, as I looked from Ghost to König.
"I brought you something as well... I hope you aren't mad at me."
He was visibly nervous, the way his entire posture changed into one of a sad puppy made me want to hug him and tell him that he has done nothing wrong. I didn't actually think I would see him again until the work place exchange. I looked at Ghost, he was standing a few feet away from us, I could see how relaxed his posture was.
However I wasn't about to let go of it that easily. I won't let him just leave and not even say as much as a goodbye.
"Oh my bear..."
I came up to him and slowly reached my arms up, as if to wrap them around his neck. He looked at me with those sweet puppy eyes again, I wanted to grab him by the collar and act upset but-
"I'm really sorry..."
He whispered as he lowered himself down for me to reach him easier and I realized I can't be mad at him. I brought him closer and hugged him.
"Don't do that again."
"Thank you-"
"Or next time I will tie you up and place a tracker on you."
I whispered into his ear so that only he could hear it, I could see the panic in his eyes as I pulled away and smiled warmly. I didn't give him any time to question me or show any kind of discomfort. I looked at Ghost still smiling warmly, not giving even the slightest of hints about what I had just said to König.
"Let's go to the main hall. Everyone must already be there."
I didn't wait for them to follow me, I just went ahead, there wasn't many people as some of them got early leave but it was still nice to celebrate a time that I usually spent alone. I walked over to Gaz who was sitting on one of the couches with a few other recruits.
The whole party was small but it was quite fun, although I could tell that both König and Ghost weren't to fond of it. König was stressed out almost through the whole thing, he kept quiet most of the time trying to keep up his intimidating persona to keep people away. Ghost on the other end just simply didn't seem to enjoy it, I guessed that holidays might not have been his thing but that didn't mean I would go sulking about it.
They were both adults, they could take care of one another.
"I didn't know you can cook this well, Schatz..." - (Treasure)
I could hear his voice shaking slightly, he was visibly nervous, unsure of how I will react.
"I don't really cook anymore so... I am happy it turned out good."
"Yeah! The cakes are especially great!"
I snickered at Soaps comment, he seemed to enjoy drinking with the desserts on the side.
"Schatz... Could I take you aside for a moment?"
His puppy eyes trying to soften my anger, however it was no longer there. I gave him the sign and followed him out of the room.
"So what was it, Misiu?" - (Teddy bear/small bear)
He cleared his throat and stood up straight, clearly planning on saying something to appease me as much as possible.
"I won't be able to see you at Christmas, Ja? So... I wished to give you something."
A gift?
"König- I didn't get you guys anything. I would feel bad-"
"Take it!"
He pushed a small box into my hands.
"I am not taking a no."
I sighed but took the box with a smile. It looked even funnier in his hands... His big...
Yhyhm. I coughed a couple of times to clear out my thoughts.
"Thank you... What is it?"
"Open and see Schatz."
He sounded excited now, like a kid giving her mom a new drawing.
Mommy...
I could see him calling me that.
God! Y/N! Take your head out of the gutter!
I unraveled the ribbon, inside of the little package I saw a bracelet, a not so thin silver chain with an intricate design. A single red corral bead on the bracelet chain. Identical to the one he was wearing on his wrist.
"How do you like it?"
"It's... really cute. I love it. Thank you König."
This was probably the cutest thing I have ever gotten from... anyone really. He reached out his hands towards mine.
"Could I help you put it on, Liebe?" - (Love)
I nodded and watched as he carefully pulled it out and then around my wrist, the metal feeling a little cold at first. I was surprised on how perfectly it fit my hand.
"Thank you, Misiu." - (Teddy bear/small bear)
"Can you promise me... that you will always wear it?"
He was a bit more stern with his request. Why was he acting so serious about this? Was this that important to him?
"Why? Is it gonna track me or something? Don't worry, I will always have it on me."
I look back on the red bead.
"To remind me about you."
Word count: 4026