I woke up in Simon's embrace, the memories of the previous night reappeared in my mind. I wasn't exactly sure how to react, however when I looked at his sleeping face, I didn't have the heart to leave. Actually, I didn't want to leave.
I didn't remember falling asleep with my clothes on but somehow I was wearing a really big shirt. I guessed it must be Simon's.
My heart beat got faster the longer I laid there, not being able to believe that this was indeed reality. However a part of me wished to be able to see his full face, but I wouldn't take off his mask without his permission. I was not going to break his trust simply because of my wants.
I caressed his face, it was smooth, I could feel it through the mask even if just a bit. Clearly shaved recently, I tried to imagine how his blond hair looked, were they light blond or dirty blond color?
"Did you sleep well?"
I was so engrossed in his beauty in my head that I didn't realize he had woken up. Now that I looked from up close, his eyes looked like button eyes on a plush toy. His brown irises perfectly round, dark enough to make his pupils hard to tell apart.
"Like never before."
"That's good."
He closed his eyes again, pulling me closer and for the first time in a long time, I wished he wouldn't let me go.
---
I was running towards the Evac spot where all the deploys were issued. They must have not left yet, I couldn't be late. I had to see him, in case it was the last time.
I watched as the KorTac soldiers filled the two cars, ready to take off and leave to our station. I saw König get ready to hop into one of them, until he saw me, he was a little torn apart, unsure if he should leave without a goodbye.
The other soldiers must have noticed his hesitance they looked at me waving to their Colonel, they proceeded to block his way to the car. Making his choice easier, he sheepishly made his way towards me almost running at full speed.
By now I knew König is a little anxious around others, so I opened my arms for him. The moment he was by my side he wrapped his arms around me picking me off the ground, and I felt my heart flutter.
"I will see you soon, Mein Shatz."
He whispered into my ear, my face buried in the crook of his neck. After a long moment we both parted our embrace, his hands held my shoulders as his eyes smiled at me behind the mask.
"Be well until then."
"You too, kochanie." - (my love)
I waved to König as he got into his car, but before I could leave I was stopped by another soldier. He was wearing glasses and a mask, his arms crossed on his chest as he stood next to me.
I could remember him from the sparing training! I think his name was Horangi?
"Our Colonel seemed to take a liking towards you."
His voice sounded distant but friendly at the same time, quite an achievement.
"It looks like it."
I smiled at him awkwardly.
"Umm... Thanks for getting me out... You know."
He looked at his team as the first car left.
"It's our job."
I nodded along, still feeling grateful. He turned his head back towards me, he seemed to be trying to read me.
"Are you a friend? Or a foe?"
I looked at him confused, but quickly understood what he meant by those words. He was asking whether I would hurt König.
I felt guilt wash over me, my feelings were a problem.
I am sure that I feel something towards him.
And I am sure he felt something for me.
But how could I ever tell him there is something between me and Ghost? After I reassured him that there was nothing? I would break his heart.
In the end who would I chose?
"That I am unable to answer."
I looked towards where his car once stood. It was gone now.
"But I do not wish to bring him harm. No. I won't ever hurt König."
I was reminded of his scratched up hands.
"Not again. Not ever."
It sounded like I was convincing myself more then him.
"We will see about that."
I watched as he started to walk away.
Did he believe me?
---
I walked back after my farewell with König. I wasn't sure what to feel anymore.
"Gloom!"
That call name.
Alejandro was walking my way.
"Haven't seen you much after you left the hospital. I would say even less then when I went to visit you."
"Ah, you know. Stuff happened."
"I heard you girls got in trouble, he? A mean Captain was it?"
I was a bit embarrassed at what happened, especially that I wasn't even there. I got my shit handed by Michael while they were listening to a nagging hag.
"Yeah, sadly there are still some stuck ups in the army."
"I heard you will be joining the task force. We might see each other more often then."
Alejandro had a big smile, he has always been a man of optimism, I guess he and the 141 were pretty close.
"That isn't decided yet."
I tried to put this rumor to rest, I was pretty convinced to join KorTac if given the chance. But now I am not that sure, perhaps there was more then a chance I would join 141.
The Mexican man nudged me with his elbow.
"If nothings decided, maybe I could snatch you up? What do you say?"
I simply shook my head with a smile. The time I spent helping Alejandro was a fruitful and eventful one, but I could feel my heart longing for a different place. Or rather a person. I tried to push those feelings aside, it was too early for such things as those.
Too early for love.
"A month ago I would have agreed right away."
I laugh bitterly with him.
"We could use someone of your caliber."
"I have heard that too many times, Colonel."
"I can imagine."
He pat me on my shoulder before starting to walk away.
"Soap has been looking for you, my guess is that Ghost put him up to something. Go see him or the poor guy might not survive till tomorrow!"
"Thanks for the quest!"
Can those men last at least 5 minutes without me?
---
I walked into the main tent with Ghost and Soap. Persha was... smoking a cigar? And so was Price... I never knew she smokes.
She started coughing lightly.
She doesn't smoke.
"Shade! It's nice to finally see you!"
She set up the 141 because she knew this conversation wasn't going to be easy. The three of them inside to talk to me, while Gaz was stationed outside. Keeping people from coming too close. He was probably still scared of me. Sadly, I don't care.
"You compromised me."
Everyone in the room froze at my words. Compromised soldiers were killed on missions. This is how they got rid of the unwanted but too good ones.
"I didn't know about it."
"You are the one who sends me out, cut that bullshit!"
I tried to get closer to her but Ghost grabbed my arm before I could throw myself on her.
"I trusted you."
"I called KorTac to find you!"
"I DON'T CARE! You left me there for days! You knew what was going on the moment I got on that helicopter!"
She stayed silent and so did everybody else. My body was rigid, the anger and fear dancing in my mind while I tried to keep my cool.
I looked at Ghost and brushed off his hand off me. Soap stood on my other side while Price was leaning against the table next to the Major. A loud sigh left her lips while she placed a hand to her temple.
"You need to understand our position doesn't always let us move immediately."
Price broke the silence. He was defending her, of course he was, they are friends. He was probably the first person to know I was abducted if not informed that I was KIA.
Either way the task force knew and didn't do shit.
Wait. My anger subsided for a moment as I realized.
Everything fit. It was as if I just put together a puzzle made for kids. I stepped back looking at everyone, Ghost blocked the exit of the tent.
They all knew.
They all fucking knew. They knew what would happen. They only pretended not too.
"It wasn't at the heli. You knew before..."
"Y/n..."
I was right. I just wanted to be sure. But I was fucking right.
"That's why you wanted me to join a task force so badly..."
"It's for your own good."
"Why didn't you tell me then. Why not tell me so I cooperate?"
I breathed in and out, deep calming breaths. I wanted to scream.
"It was safer if you didn't know."
"Well now I do. And I made my decision."
I could see a small smile of relief forming on Persha's lips. She had no idea what was about to hit her.
"I am joining KorTac."
Word count: 1467