I was nervous.
Scratch that, that was an understatement. I was more than nervous.
A few hours after my talk with Saehi, I got out of bed, dressed up, texted Yeonjun, and asked him to meet me at the beach in front of my cottage.
It was far enough that the actual crowd of students would not see us and make us the center of attention but not far enough that we would be completely alienated in the dark.
I wasn't sure I would be okay with Yeonjun and I being alone right now.
The cool evening air kissed my skin as I stepped onto the sand. The beach stretched out ahead of me, illuminated only by the soft glow of the moon and distant stars. T
he waves lapped at the shore, their rhythmic sounds calming the nervous energy swirling inside me. I pulled my jacket tighter around myself, glancing at the flickering lights of the bonfire in the distance.
Everyone was gathering fireworks for midnight. Everyone wanted to celebrate the last night with light and joy and fireworks.
Laughter and music drifted faintly from where the other students were gathered, but it felt worlds away from where I stood.
I calmed my breathing and waited.
Saehi's conversation sparked a debate inside my head but there were no winners. Only the realization that somehow, somewhere, I started catching some kind of feelings for him.
I wasn't sure what it exactly was, or how I could name it but it was there, a small part of me, that had feelings for him.
Maybe it was one of the many time he helped me or one of the many times we had open conversations about him and me and our so very different lives. Maybe it was the first day I met him or maybe it was yesterday.
I don't know exactly where this ball started forming but I know that last night when I felt like he was going to say something, I hoped it would be that he felt similar to what I was feeling.
I was so busy with all the different drama every week, and the repetitive back and forth with Yeonjun that I stuffed that little part of me back into a corner of my brain and didn't dare confront it.
At least I owed it to that part to have this conversation with Yeonjun.
The discussion I had in mind was not a very cheery one and thinking about the expression he had when I told him it was a mistake didn't help my conscience when I texted him.
This could go wrong in so many different ways. I wasn't even sure what Yeonjun was going to say to me last night. It very well could not be what Saehi and I interpreted it to be. Our conversation was all based on assumptions.
My assumptions.
And if he didn't actually have any real feelings, I would make a fool out of myself.
I shifted my weight from foot to foot, staring out at the horizon, waiting for Yeonjun.
Every minute felt like an hour, and my thoughts kept circling back to the conversation I was about to have. The tension building in my chest was like a knot I couldn't untangle.
Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a figure approaching.
My heart skipped a beat as Yeonjun walked toward me, hands shoved in his pockets.
He moved with a quiet confidence, his tall frame silhouetted against the moonlit beach. His dark hair was tousled by the wind, and as he got closer, I could make out his sharp featuresâthe serious set of his jaw, the way his eyes, even in the dim light, held a certain intensity.
He stopped a few feet away from me, and for a moment, we just stood there in silence.
The space between us felt charged, like there was a fragile balance we both were too afraid to disturb.
"Hey," he said, his voice low, almost cautious.
He didn't smile, but there was something soft in his gaze, something I hadn't seen before.
"Hi" I replied, trying to keep my voice steady.
The silence stretched again, the only sound the gentle crash of the waves behind us.
I shifted awkwardly, unsure of how to start. This conversation had been swirling in my head for hours, but now, with Yeonjun standing right in front of me, I couldn't find the right words.
"I wasn't sure if you'd come," I admitted, my voice a little quieter than I intended.
It did cross my mind that maybe he was too angry at me because I left so abruptly last night. That was the reason why I didn't even check my phone to see whether he replied tot he texty I sent him.
Yeonjun's eyes flickered, and he shrugged.
"Of course I'd come," he said simply.
"What's going on, Yuri? Why did you want to meet here?"Â He took a step closer, his gaze fixed on mine.
I took a deep breath, trying to steady the storm of emotions inside me. His face was unreadable, as usual, but there was something different in the way he looked at me nowâsomething more vulnerable, more open.
"I... I needed to talk to you, about last night." I began, trying to keep my voice from shaking.
His expression shifted, his eyes narrowing slightly, as if he already knew where this was going.
"Last night? I wasn't sure you wanted to talk to me anymore, given how you left" he echoed. He looked away for a brief moment, then back at me.
"Yeah. I figured we might need to talk about that" I say and keep myself from biting my lip raw.
The wind picked up, making the sea foam dance across the shore. I crossed my arms, both from the cold and the weight of what I was about to say.
"I'm not sure what happened last night, but I can't stop thinking about it. And I think... I think we were about to say something important. Or at least, it felt like we were" I continued slowly.
Yeonjun's jaw tightened, and he let out a small sigh. His eyes, dark and reflective in the moonlight, never left mine.
"You mean, before Hyejin showed up." his eyes were dark but his gaze felt warm.
"Yeah, before that"Â I nodded.
He paused, running a hand through his hair, his frustration barely concealed.
"I didn't plan on dragging you away like that," he said, his voice a little rough around the edges.
"But when I saw you with Soobin... I don't know. Something just... I reacted." he stares at me, as if that is the only explanation he has.
"Why? Why did you react like that?"Â I asked, my voice more pointed than I expected.
Yeonjun's eyes searched mine, as if he was struggling to find the right words. For a moment, he looked vulnerable in a way I wasn't used to seeing.
Then he let out a soft, almost bitter laugh, shaking his head.
"I don't know, Yuri. Maybe it's because every time I see you with him, I feel... I don't know. Like I'm losing you, even though I never really had you" he admits.
I blinked, taken aback by his admission. My heart pounded in my chest, the knot in my stomach tightening.
"Yeonjun, what are you trying to say?"
He hesitated for a long moment, his gaze dropping to the sand between us.
"What I'm trying to say, is that I don't like seeing you with Soobin because... because I care about you, Yuri. More than I probably should." his voice is just above whisper but I hear them loud and clear, mimicking the loud drums beating in my heart.
My breath caught in my throat. His words hung in the air, heavy and real. This was itâthe thing I had been both dreading and hoping for.
"I don't know when it started," he continued, his voice low and steady now.
"But it's there. Every time I see you, every time we talk... I can't shake it. And last night, I just... I wanted to say something. But Hyejin showed up, andâ" He stopped, looking frustrated again.
"And I lost my chance." he pins me with his stare.
The weight of his confession pressed down on me, making it hard to breathe. I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but the words seemed to stick in my throat.
Yeonjun took a step closer, his gaze intense.
"I'm not good at this, Yuri. I don't do feelings, not like this. But I can't keep pretending like it doesn't bother me when you're with Soobin. I... I like you."
My heart was racing, my mind spinning.
"Yeonjun," I started, my voice barely above a whisper.
"I... I don't know what to say." it wasn't so much that I didn't have anything to say but rather the fact that I had trouble forming sentences given the blood rush to my brain right now.
"You don't have to say anything right now. I just needed you to know"Â He gave a small, sad smile.
For a long moment, neither of us spoke. The tension between us was thick, but it wasn't the uncomfortable kind. It was charged, electric, full of things we had both been holding back for too long.
This was my chance to say it. Actually say how I feel.
"Yeonjun, I... I think I feel the same way"Â Finally, I found my voice.
His eyes widened slightly, like he hadn't expected me to say that.
"You do?"
I nodded, swallowing hard.
"Yeah. I think I do. But I'm scared. I'm scared because everything with you is so... intense. And I don't know if I'm ready for that."
"I get it," Yeonjun's expression softened.
"But if you're willing to try... I'll be here. I'm not going anywhere"Â he said quietly.
I stared at him, my heart torn between the fear of what could go wrong and the thrill of what could be right. The waves crashed softly behind us, and for the first time in what felt like forever, I wasn't sure what to do next.
The silence between us lingered, thick with the weight of everything that had been said. I could feel my heartbeat in my throat, my pulse racing.
Yeonjun was standing so close now that I could see every detail of his faceâthe sharp line of his jaw, the curve of his lips, the way his eyes softened as they held mine.
Suddenly, the sound of fireworks cracking in the distance interrupted the stillness. Bright colors exploded in the sky, illuminating the beach with bursts of red, green, and gold. The bonfire celebration must have kicked off, and the vibrant display painted the horizon in vivid strokes of light.
For a moment, neither of us looked away.
But then, Yeonjun took another step closer, and my attention snapped back to him. The fireworks were a distant hum now, my entire focus drawn to the boy in front of me.
"Yuri," he whispered, his voice barely audible over the distant crackle of the fireworks. His hand reached out slowly, his fingers gently brushing a strand of hair away from my face.
The touch sent a shiver down my spine, and I felt the world around us start to fade, as if we were the only two people on the beach, in the world.
I could see the uncertainty in his eyes, the flicker of hesitation as he searched my face for some kind of sign. But I didn't move away. I didn't want to.
My breath hitched, and for a moment, time seemed to slow. Yeonjun's gaze flicked down to my lips, then back to my eyes, and it was like a magnetic pull.
I felt myself leaning in, the air between us charged with anticipation. His hand, now cupping the side of my face, was warm, grounding me in the moment.
"Can I?" he whispered, his voice low and rough, as if he was barely holding back.
"Yes "I nodded, barely able to form words.
That was all it took.
Yeonjun closed the gap between us in one smooth motion, his lips capturing mine in a kiss that was gentle at first, as if he was afraid to rush it.
But the second our lips met, a spark ignited. His lips were soft, warm, and they moved against mine with a careful tenderness, like he was savoring every second of it.
The world around us seemed to vanish completely.
The sound of the waves, the fireworks, everything faded into the background. All I could feel was Yeonjunâhis hand on my cheek, his other hand resting lightly on my waist, pulling me just a little closer, his lips molding perfectly with mine.
My heart was racing, but in the best way possible.
I reached up, my hands tentatively finding their way to his shoulders, feeling the steady rise and fall of his chest. His scentâsomething fresh and a little earthyâwashed over me, and I couldn't help but melt into him, losing myself in the moment.
As the kiss deepened, Yeonjun's grip on me tightened slightly, his fingers brushing the small of my back, sending a jolt of electricity through me.
His lips moved with a newfound urgency, like he had been waiting for this for far too long. I responded in kind, letting my hands slide up to his neck, feeling the soft strands of his hair slip between my fingers.
For a moment, it felt like we were suspended in time, the kiss both sweet and intense, filled with all the unspoken feelings we had been holding back for so long.
When we finally pulled away, both of us were breathless, our foreheads resting against each other's. The fireworks still crackled in the distance, the sky above us filled with shimmering colors, but all I could see was Yeonjun, his face lit up by the soft glow of the night.
His eyes were half-lidded, his lips slightly swollen from the kiss, and there was a look of wonder in his gaze, like he couldn't quite believe what had just happened.
I couldn't either.
"Wow," he whispered, his voice soft, barely audible over the remnants of the fireworks.
I let out a shaky breath, feeling my cheeks flush.
"Yeah, wow" I whispered back, my voice just as soft.
I couldn't believe what just happened.
For a moment, we just stood there, holding each other, the fireworks lighting up the sky above us. There was no need for more words. Everything we needed to say had already been spoken through that kiss.
Yeonjun smiled, that rare, genuine smile that made his whole face light up. He brushed his thumb across my cheek, his eyes filled with something I couldn't quite name but that made my heart swell in my chest.
"That was worth the wait," he murmured, and I couldn't help but smile back, my heart feeling lighter than it had in a long time.
Maybe this was just the beginning.
Maybe there were still so many things to figure out between us.
But in that moment, with Yeonjun standing in front of me, his arms still wrapped around me and the night sky filled with fireworks, I knew one thing for certain.
This was a moment I would never forget.
A/N: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS HAPPENED.
Oh my god! This was such a long chapter and I was planning on this scene from the day I started writing Royals. Trust me, this chapter was 2 years in making and oh my god, why do I feel so emotional?
What do you guys think? Is it what you guys imagined?
Also, the kiss was not pg-13. I had to make a lot of edits, because this is a highschool love story but still , I am so so so so so happy!!!!