Farrah made it two blocks before she fell apart.
Sheâd sat stone-faced through lunch, hauled ass to a department store near Z Hotel, and bulldozed her way into a restroom stall before she collapsed into a heaping mess.
Blake freakinâ Ryan.
Of all the times he couldâve walked back into her life, he had to do it now, when she was 1) unemployed and therefore unable to brush off his generous offer, and 2) so sexually frustrated sheâd gotten turned on by a handshake.
Farrah shivered when she remembered the strong, warm grip of Blakeâs hand around hers and the resulting shock of electricity that had traveled up her arm and into her chest, making her heart beat in a way she didnât think it capable of doing anymore.
Sheâd dated other guys since Shanghai. Some of them sheâd liked, some of them she hadnât. None could turn her into a live wire of emotions like Blake could.
Smoky memories of long nights, passionate kisses, and whispered secrets crawled into Farrahâs brain, drowning her in the past.
I think youâre a smartass whoâs too stubborn for your own good. I think you drive me crazier than any person ought to. And I think I might die if I canât be with you.
Whatever happens, we can get through it together.
You said once every second counts, and I donât want another second to go by without you knowing that I am totally, completely, one hundred percent in love with you.
A sob escaped her throat. Farrah pressed a fist to her mouth, struggling to remain calm before she turned into a girl-crying-over-a-boy-in-a-public-restroom cliché. Even though her eyes were already glazed with tears. Even though her chest ached so much she wanted to curl up in a fetal position on the floor, germs and potential cholera be damned.
She wasnât in love with Blake anymore. You needed trust for love, and heâd lost hers long ago. But dammit if he couldnât make her heart pound with one smile, and her body clench with one touch. Their physical chemistry had always been off the charts, and apparently, the flames still burned hot after all these years.
A call from Olivia lit up her phone and yanked her thoughts off the dangerous path theyâd taken.
Farrah swallowed and composed herself before answering.
âHello?â A slight waver. Pretty good, considering snot and dried tears streaked her face. Farrah yanked a few so-thin-they-were-transparent squares of toilet paper from the roll and wiped her face. It was like exfoliating her skin with sandpaper.
âHey! Howâd the lunch meeting go?â Olivia asked.
âFine. What are you doing calling me from work?â Farrah stalled, debating whether to clue Olivia in on todayâs developments now or wait until they were face-to-face.
Now, she decided. Olivia was going to shit bricks. Sheâd hated Blake since he broke up with Farrah, and Farrah was already bracing herself for the hurricane once she told Olivia sheâd accepted Blakeâs job offer.
âIâm on a coffee break,â Olivia said, which surprised Farrah almost as much as seeing Blake at The Aviary. Olivia worked long, hard hours as an analyst at Wall Streetâs most prestigious private equity firm, and she rarely took a break on the clock. âI have six minutes and twenty-seven seconds before my break is over, so give me the deets quick.â
âOkay.â Farrah took a deep breath. âLong story short: I got the job, and theyâre paying me $900 an hour.â
Always lead with the good news first.
âOh my God!â Olivia whisper-yelled. âThatâs amazing! $900 an hour? We have to celebrate! I wonât make it out in time for happy hour todayâthis deal weâre working on is the bane of my existence, I swearâbut Iâll pick up ice cream and wine on my way home. We can have a proper celebratory dinner this weekend.â
âSounds great.â
There was a pause. âWhy do you sound so not excited about this? Is it the client? Heâs a jerk, isnât he? Or is he a creepy old perv? Remember, if he tries anything, you can take one of your stiletto heels and jam it up hisââ
âItâs Blake.â
âBlake who?â
âBlake Ryan.â
Another pause, and then, âYour new client is Blake Ryan?â
Her yell pierced Farrahâs eardrums. Farrah winced and held the phone away from her ear as Olivia uttered a stream of curses so colorful and fantasy murder scenarios so graphic, she couldâve moonlighted as a horror author.
Once she stopped for breath, Farrah interjected. âLook, I get it. The situation is not ideal.â That was putting it mildly, but Farrah didnât want to fan the flames of Oliviaâs anger. âBut I donât know when Iâll get a new job, and I need the money. Heâs paying me a lot, Liv. Likeâ¦enough to cover half a year of expenses if Iâm smart about saving.â
She could hear her friend ruminating in the silence that followed. âHave you asked yourself why, exactly, heâs paying you so much?â
Farrah frowned. Sheâd been so surprised by Blakeâs sudden reappearance in her life she hadnât stopped to think about the reasons behind his offer. âNoâ¦â
Suspicion seeped into her veins. Why had Blake been so insistent on hiring her? Heâd kicked her to the curb for his ex-girlfriend, and they hadnât spoken in half a decade. Plus, he could hire any designer in the city for the price he was paying.
They werenât friends on social media, but sheâd stumbled on articles about him over the years. His sports bars were doing well. Really well. Despite herself, a flicker of pride flared in Farrahâs stomach at his success.
Farrah had walked into the meeting intending to quote $150 an hour, given this was her first freelance gig. Once sheâd realized the client was Blake, sheâd jacked the price up to $300, desperate for an excuse not to have to see him again. When he not only agreed but tripled her rate, Farrah nearly had a heart attack. Not even Kelly Burke commanded $900 an hour.
âHeâs up to something. Be careful,â Olivia warned. âThe boy is your kryptonite. Donât do anything stupid.â
Not so much a boy anymore.
Farrahâs mouth watered when she remembered how good Blake looked. College Blake had been hot, but heâd possessed a boyishness common amongst twenty-two-year-olds. Grown-up Blake, with his stubble and lean muscles and confident, panther-like stride? He was fiercer, grittier, and he exuded a raw, hard masculinity that turned her knees to Jell-O.
âLike what? Iâm designing his apartment. Itâll take a few months. Thatâs it.â The words rang false to Farrahâs own ears.
âUh-huh.â Skepticism coated Oliviaâs voice. âI mean it, Farrah. Stay as far away from Blake as possible. Iâve seen his picture in magazines from time to time. Heâs still fine as hell, which makes him dangerous. Donât sleep with him, and for Godâs sake, donât fall in love with him again.â
Now, that made Farrah laugh. âI wonât fall in love with him again.â She was horny, not an idiot. Her body may crave Blake, but sheâd built enough defenses around her heart to keep an invading army at bay.
âGood.â Olivia sounded satisfied. âSo, heâs Landonâs friend, huh? What are the freakinâ odds?â
âWell, Landon is from Austin.â Now that Farrah thought about it, she remembered Blake mentioning back in Shanghai that his best friend was a hotel heir. Landon was the one whoâd floated him the capital to start his bar. Blake might even have mentioned him by name. Farrah couldnât believe she didnât put two and two together until now.
âSo are millions of other people. God, this world is too small.â Olivia sighed. âShit. My break is up. Weâll discuss later, okay? In the meantime, buy yourself something nice, like a big bottle of vodka. You need it.â
Farrah snorted. âThanks.â
She hung up, took a deep breath, and unlocked the stall. Thankfully, the bathroom had emptied, and no one was there to witness what a mess she was.
Farrah splashed water on her face, letting the cool liquid fortify her.
Blakeâs project would take a few months, max. She could go that long without giving in to her base desires. Right?
Another image of Blakeâs dimpled smile and broad shoulders flashed through her mind, and heat sluiced through her.
Dammit.
Maybe it was a good thing sheâd agreed to go on that blind date with Oliviaâs co-worker. Hopefully, itâd take the edge off.
Farrah stared at herself in the mirror. Her reflection blinked back, uncertain and uneasy.
âFarrah Lin, what have you gotten yourself into?â