âIâm sorry I didnât do this sooner,â I tell the three graves in front of me as emotion chokes my voice.
I close my eyes as the Arizona sun beats down on me.
âA part of me will always be buried here with you.â A tear tracks down my cheek. For them. For me. For everything Iâve done. âIâm not the same man you knew.â
Iâm not the same.
But I became who I had to be.
âItâs still hard for me to believe itâs over. That this battle is done. But it is.â I bow my head. âIt is.â
A gentle gust of wind passes over me. And it feels like the world is taking a breath with me.
Lifting my head, I look over at Cassandra standing near our car, stomach round with twins, a boy and a girl. And I picture the smile my mother would give her. I picture the way sheâd hug my children and shower them with love. I think of Freya as an aunt. How she would spoil the kids. How she would love to tell embarrassing stories about me to Cassandra.
A little more lightness fills my chest.
âI think youâd like my wife,â I tell my family. âSheâs⦠Sheâs my second chance. My new beginning.â
I step forward to Freyaâs headstone and press the Post-it to the top.
This one is in my handwriting.
This isnât goodbye.