Darius and I sat cuddled together in the living room all morning until footsteps forced us to break apart. The business of the day pulled him away from me and had him out of the house before I had even gotten out of the bathroom. To say I was disappointed would have been an understatement. Growing up, I had always wished for the kind of relationship where we woke up together, went to work and came back to dinner in bed with orgasms to round up the day. I wanted the boring relationship and the boring life but it was clear that life got me mixed up with someone else because my life was anything but boring.
Once I was dressed for the day, I was ready to be out of the house. I was at the door when Amy cleared her throat. The weather was getting a bit cold so she was in mittens and an oversized sweatshirt that I knew belonged to Ian. My brows rose as I took in her appearance and she flushed pink.
"This isn't about me," she mumbled. "You're the one leaving the house. Where are you going?"
"I need to see my grandmother. I have some questions that only she can answer. Are you going to tell me why you're in Ian's sweatshirt? Does Darius know what's happening?"
"Darius is staying out of it because he trusts me, you should too. Ian and I are just experimenting. I'm not ready to commit right now and so we are just seeing where things go."
"That almost never ends well," I warned and she sighed.
"Believe me, I know but I'm not ready to put in my all anymore especially not after what happened last time. I know we're mates but not all mates are like you and Darius. Sometimes, mates aren't fit for each other and they have to choose other people. What if I'm not the right fit for him and I'm standing in the way of his true happiness." "If that were true, you wouldn't be in his sweatshirt right now. I don't know all the answers but I will say that you should talk to him and let him know how you really feel. It's Ian, he's going to do everything he can to make you feel safe."
"Thank you, Leindra,â she whispered and I smiled at her. "You should be careful out there. I hear it might rain today and the floors will be a little slippery."
I thanked her for the heads up and rushed out. It was already drizzling when I was leaving and I hoped that the rain would stay at bay until I was done. I really was going to see my grandmother first. I needed to talk to her about everything and I needed to know why she didn't tell me about her suspicions earlier. I didn't call to let her know I was coming because I didn't want to give her the opportunity to avoid me and prepare answers to my questions.
When I got to the house, she was sitting on the porch and her eyes widened as she saw me. It had been a while since I was at the house and it looked exactly the same but also so different. She welcomed me with a hug and I allowed myself to relax in her hold like I normally would.
"I didn't know you were coming," she said as she pulled back. "You're in luck because I happened to do a lot of baking today. I was preparing to go out anyway, you could have missed me."
"Sorry, it was a last-minute decision to come here today. Can I come in?"
Something in my tone must have told her that I was serious because she nodded and led me inside. The inside was the same and I remembered a few weeks ago when I referred to it as home but it didn't feel like that anymore. Home for me was now wherever Darius was and it was a gothic castle at the edge of the woods. Even the interior of this house felt off to me. I couldn't believe that I had lived there for a while.
Grandma gestured for me to sit down while she went into the kitchen to make some tea for us. I sat with my hands folded in my lap as I watched her through the kitchen door. I could have gone to help her but something told me that she needed that space to gather herself for the questions I was going to ask. When she returned, it was with a cup of tea and some tea cakes as sides.
"Thank you," I took a sip of the tea so it wouldn't look rude and a bite of the cake.
"Why are you really here, Leindra? I know it wasn't just to see me as much as I wish that were true. Is something wrong with Darius? Do you need some advice?"
"Why didn't you tell me that you thought my parent's accident wasn't an accident?" she looked shocked that I knew. She probably expected that Darius would hide it from me for a while. "I was in that car with them in case you forgot. Didn't you think I reserved the right to know?"
"When would I have told you?" she asked. "Was it when you would wake up every night with nightmares of the accident? Was it when you were so riddled with guilt that you would lock yourself in the room and refuse to speak to anyone? You were too young to shoulder that kind of burden."
Her voice was soft as she reached out to squeeze my shoulder affectionately but that wasn't what had me pausing. All this time I thought that her suspicions were a new thing, I didn't realize she had been suspecting since they died- that was five years ago. She kept that to herself for five years. I stared at her incredulously.
"Five years," I told her and she pulled back from me slowly. "How could you live with yourself for five years knowing that your daughter could have been murdered and you did nothing to find her killer?"
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"I did nothing," she laughed humorlessly and stood to her feet. She disappeared in the direction of her room and when she came back, there was a huge box in her hands. She handed it over to me. "I have spent every waking moment of the past five years trying to piece together what I could about their death."
I opened the box and there were newspaper clippings about the accident, pictures of random people I didn't know. I saw my mother's phone which I thought was lost in the accident. There were phone records and blurry pictures of my parents going in and out of places. She had truly been doing her own investigations undercover.
"Why didn't you tell the police?" I asked. "They have better resources, they could have searched better. They could have found things that you missed."
"This town was in an uproar after your parents died. People were shifting without control. The last thing anyone needed was any more stress. I know you're upset and rightfully so because this is a lot but if I thought that there was a perfect time before this then I would have said something."
I sighed deeply and handed the box to her. "Sometimes it isn't your call to make." She looked taken aback by my words. A few months ago, I would have let it slide but I wasn't the same person I was back then. I was tired of Grandma making decisions that affected all of us. I deserved to know and she had no right to keep it away from me. "You're growing up," she said more to herself than to me. "I am so proud of you, Leindra. You might not realize it yet but you are going to be an amazing ruler and you will do amazing things."
"I'm not ruling anyone. Darius is the ruler. I'm just his mate."
"As his mate, you have the same power and authority that he has. You will do great."
"Thank you,"
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I could have left at that moment. I had gotten all the answers I came for but I decided to spend some more time with her. It had been a while since we sat down just both of us and I still had about an hour until I had to leave. I told her everything that had been happening with me and she told me all about her bingo classes and the woman she thought was cheating. I enjoyed listening to her and it felt just like old times.
I was able to sit there for a few minutes and pretend that I was just Leindra and she was just my grandmother. It couldn't last forever because my phone buzzed snapping
me out of my bubble. I glanced at it and cursed when I realized I was late.
"I should go," I rushed to my feet and she nodded in understanding. "I don't know when next I will be able to come visit."
"I understand, you're a busy woman now and you have your own things to take care of. It was only a matter of time before you left home," she gestured for me to wait and disappeared into the kitchen. When she returned, it was with a dish filled with pastries. "At least take this back with you, I need to make sure that you're being fed properly."
I laughed at her words and took it. "Thank you, Grandma. I love you."
"I love you too."
It sounded more like a goodbye but I chose not to dwell on it as I made my way out of the house. She watched me get into the car and she stood on the porch until I had driven out. I watched her through the rearview mirror and she didn't return back into the house until I was on the main road.
Once she had disappeared, I took out my phone and glanced at the message I had gotten. I dialed the number and it connected after the third ring.
"I'm a busy man, Leindra," Brandon drawled. "Besides, don't you have to work soon?"
"I didn't realize you were stalking me."
"I'll be at my house for the next hour. If you want your answers then you better come quick. It is a one-time only offer and it expires very soon."
He hung up right after and I muttered a row of expletives under my breath. I knew I shouldn't be doing it but as Brandon had correctly guessed, I needed answers and I was going to get them at any cost so I turned the car in the direction of his house and I hit the gas.