As I was driving home, I kept thinking of Phuwin the entire time. He was really such a nice and sweet guy, and I just admired his sense of dedication towards his craft. But I also realized he was a very funny guy too and we shared a common sense of humour.
My thoughts particularly flitted back to when I had cornered Phuwin against the dining table, and I was this close to him. His features, eyes, and lips kept playing in my head. He didn't know it then, but for a minute, I had almost slipped up and wavered. If he hadn't turned red, I may have just about kissed him.
Ugh. I had to stop playing fairy tales in my head. There was no way in chance that he would fall for someone like me. I sighed as I got into my carpark, clearly aware that I had been playing away my slowly blossoming crush for Phuwin as teasing.
I got home and took out my phone only for Phuwin to text and check if I had gotten home safe. I replied positively, and he told me to rest well.
I asked if he had any plans the following day, and he mentioned the workshop but nothing else thereafter. I looked at his reply, wondering if I should ask him out for a meal. Just as I was about to text him, another text from Phuwin flitted in asking if I had anything on.
I replied that I had nothing on and was free for the day. His reply came back almost instantly, "Dinner together then P? What do you say?"
I inevitably smiled to myself as I agreed to dinner. I told him to pick somewhere nice as a form of treat for his hard work he was going to put in tomorrow's workshop. He agreed, and we logged off for the night.
The next day, I waited for him outside the studio around 6 pm. Phuwin finally came out, looking tired, and as he looked up at me, I noticed the cuts on his face. I was alarmed and as soon as he got to the car, before I could say anything, he got into the car. I got in and turned to him.
I asked him what happened, but he refused to answer and just asked if we could skip dinner instead and go home. I agreed and drove him home. On the way, I ordered some Uber eats, and it got to his place the same time we got there. We got into the apartment, and this time the minute the door closed shut, I held onto his hand and pulled him towards me.
I lifted his chin up, forcing him to look at me. I realized he had cuts near his left eyebrow and lips. I asked him what had happened. He refused to answer me, but I wasn't taking no for an answer.
"Do I need to ask your manager?"
Phuwin looked up at me, terrified, shaking his head no. I persisted again and he finally told me what happened.
"Post the workshop, I went to my trailer. My manager came in storming after. He was pissed with me because the director had wanted me to do this particularly raunchy scene, and I wasn't comfortable. So I told the director no. And said there were some things I couldn't bring myself to do. The director got pissed with me and relegated me to a supporting one instead of the starring role as initially promised. My manager was angry with me for ruining the chance and threw my cup at the floor and the pieces shattered; injuring me. He said I was being a wimp still and needed to understand that sex sells, and I had to learn to just do those scenes. P..I just..
Am not comfortable yet... my manager knows this well and I don't understand why he can't respect my choices."
"But he shouldn't have thrown the glass like that."
"He said I'm lucky he didn't throw it at my face though he wanted to because he said he didn't want to reduce the value any further."
I stared horrified at Phuwin. I was so angry and my face was streaking red. I clenched my fists tightly and Phuwin could sense my anger.
"P.. please. I be ok. I.. its all rights. The cuts will heal. Don't do anything please. It's fine. I'm fine. Really."
I turned away trying to rein in my anger. Phuwin held onto my arm tightly and didn't let go. I could hear his voice starting to break as he begged me not to do anything.
I turned around to him and hugged him tightly, assuring him that I wasn't going to do anything to his manager out of respect for him but if the guy laid 1 more hand on him ever again, I wouldn't let it go.
Phuwin nodded in my hold. He finally pulled away looking at me. I ran my fingers gently over his cuts, insisting he needed to put something on it but he assured me it will be fine soon. I brushed my finger over the cut near his lips. Just then it was as if time stopped as we both looked at each other. Phuwin's eyes glittered as he looked up at me and I realized I didn't move my finger away from his lips.
"Are ....y...ou ok?" I stuttered out, knowing my face was turning redder by the minute.
"I will be.." Phuwin replied. I nodded, knowing I had to pull my finger away but for some reason, my hand refused to cooperate. Just then Phuwin's phone rang, breaking us out of our reverie. He pulled away as I also let go simultaneously.
I watched as he answered his call, his face streaking red and I knew mine wasn't any better either.