Chapter 31: The Renegade Billionaire: Chapter 31

“It’s fine. I’m fine. We’re totally fine,” Madison says in the shower. It’s the third one she’s taken since last night, so I know everything is not fine.

I got up this morning and drove an hour away to buy Plan B, only to remember that today is Thanksgiving and the twenty-four-hour pharmacy is running on limited hours. What if someone needed insulin or an EpiPen?

“Tomorrow is fine. It will be fine.” She’s still muttering to herself as steam billows out over the shower curtain.

She’s spiraling and is anything but fine, so I strip down and step into the scalding water behind her.

“You can’t burn my sperm away, sweetheart.” I reach around her to adjust the temperature.

Her shoulders droop, and she hiccups. Fuck me, she’s crying.

Spinning her to face me, she attempts to avert her gaze, but I see the tears mixing with the shower spray, and it guts me. I nearly crumple to the floor and beg for forgiveness even though we both know it was an accident.

Still, I blame fucking Pops for jinxing us with his talk about safe sex.

“The pharmacy in Hopevale opens at noon,” I tell her. “I’ll go as soon as it opens.”

She drops her forehead to my chest. “They don’t sell Plan B there. It’s a family-owned pharmacy, and they refuse to sell it.”

What kind of backward bullshit is that?

“I’ll go back to the twenty-four-hour one tonight. They’re open from two to eight.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to be a mother.” Her voice is so low the running water almost drowns it out. “But my mother isn’t winning any parenting awards anytime soon. What if I’m bad at it?”

Now is not the time to tell her that the thought of being a father terrifies me to my very bones. But there’s something about Madison questioning her own ability that twists the knife in my chest a little harder. She’d be an amazing mom.

“You could never be bad at it. You’re too full of love.” It’s the truth, even if it confuses everything I thought I wanted after raising Sage.

But if we find out that she’s pregnant, it’s ultimately her decision, and I’ll support her no matter what she decides.

She inhales deeply three times, then stands upright with a too-bright smile. “I’m sure it’s fine.” There’s that fucking word again. Fine. It’s a bullet to the nuts every time she says it. “I just had my period not that long ago.” Her words gain strength, but the sadness in her expression tells a different story. “Women ovulate before their periods. It’s totally going to be fine.” Her smile turns the sunbeam down a few notches until it almost resembles her real one.

“No matter what happens, Madison, I am here for you, for us.” My gaze draws down to her stomach. Could my baby be inside her right now? The thought makes my mind spiral.

She turns away quickly. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” I reach around her again to turn off the water. She was hiding in here, but it’s time to face the day.

“Like the idea of me being pregnant terrifies you.”

“I wouldn’t be human if it didn’t scare me at least a little. But let’s not borrow trouble. There’s no use in worrying about something that might not even be.”

Wrapping a towel around her, I turn to retrieve one for myself.

“What if I don’t want to take Plan B?” she whispers, but the words detonate explosions inside my body.

I take my time wrapping a towel around my waist before turning back to her. She’s biting her bottom lip again, and I can practically feel the fear rolling off her.

What if she doesn’t take it? I don’t fucking know. Think, Braxton. Don’t say something stupid—something you will definitely regret.

“If you don’t want to take it, then we’ll figure out all the right steps to keep you safe. I’m here to support you whatever you decide,” I say with a confidence I don’t feel. “You just have to tell me what you want, and I’ll do whatever I can.”

“I’m not saying I won’t take it, it’s just not something I ever thought I’d do.” Tears stream down her face, and I know without her saying it that she feels alone, even though I’m right beside her. It cuts deeper than I would’ve expected.

Pulling her into my arms, I hold her tight. “Whatever you decide, I’ll be by your side.”

“But what do you want?” She sobs into my chest, and I drop my chin to the top of her head.

“I honestly don’t know, sweetheart.” It’s the truth, but it makes her cry harder, and I feel like an asshole.

A sharp knock on the door has us both standing a little taller.

“Brax?” Grey calls through the door. “I’ve got an errand to run. I’ll be back in a couple of hours, so I’ll meet you guys at the church. The turkey is prepped and ready to go in the oven.”

“Okay.” It comes out crackly, so I clear my throat. “See you there.”

He doesn’t answer, so I know he’s already gone.

“We’ll get through this, okay? I promise you. I’m not going anywhere.”

My mind is running a hundred different scenarios, but Madison needs me, and it makes my decision easy.

I want what she wants.

Whatever that ends up being.

Grey ended up taking much longer than he expected, though I still have no idea where he ran off to. It left Sage and me to cook Thanksgiving dinner for everyone when we returned from serving lunch at the church. Luckily, everyone pitched in, so when he finally walks through the door at six o’clock, we’re just sitting down to eat.

Madison sits to my right. Sage sits on my left with Pops at the head of the table. Then it’s Clover and Savvy, and Grey heads up the other end.

“Nice of you to join us,” Savvy says with a cluck of her tongue.

“Missed me, did you?” His voice is full of ice.

Clover sits across from us, staring at Madison’s face, and when I look down, she’s mouthing I’m fine to her friend.

She’s put on a great show all day, but the tension around her is a force field keeping me at bay, and I hate it.

We all hold hands as Pops says a relatively normal grace, but when we break apart, I keep Madison’s hand in mine under the table. She looks up at me with a watery gaze, and I wish I knew what the right thing to say was.

Since words aren’t enough, I lean in and kiss her cheek at the same time as I squeeze her hand.

Thankfully, Sage and Pops keep the conversation flowing. They talk about everything and nothing, but I don’t think Madison hears any of it. She smiles at all the right times and answers direct questions, but she’s lost to her fears where I can’t reach her.

After all the plates have been passed around, I sit back in my chair, taking in my surroundings in a different way—a new way—a family way.

Friends laugh and talk. Savvy and Grey bicker on one end of the table, while Clover and Sage debate who will win the Sunshine Bowl next season.

This is family. My skin prickles as though I’m being watched, and when I scan the room, I meet Grey’s gaze. He seems a little lost. Is he experiencing this the same way I am?

When the forks are set down, the conversation keeps going around and around, but Madison stands with her plate in her hands, causing everyone to look up at her.

“Um, I’ll just start clearing the table, for, ah, dessert,” she says, not really looking at anyone.

Grey stands so suddenly that his chair scrapes against the floor. “I’ll help you.”

Savvy frowns, and I start to rise too, but Grey holds out a hand. “Stay,” he says. “I’ll help. I missed the rest, and Madi can show me what to do.”

I nod, even as a sense of unease makes my neck prickle. I’m hating myself a little that two of the most important people in my life are struggling, and I have no idea how to help them.

Madison and I decided I’d leave right after dessert, when everyone’s in a food coma and too tired to question me. She must’ve decided to take the medication that would terminate a pregnancy before it had a chance to start.

My knuckles dig into my chest. There’s an unbearable ache there, and it feels like a loss, but that’s ridiculous. I can’t mourn something that never happened, something I don’t even know for sure that I wanted.

But as she stands to go with Grey following closely behind, I know it is.

I wanted that baby.

I want a family, my family, all of them, and I want it all with Madison.

“Are you okay?” Madison asks, closing the bedroom door behind her.

I’d made an excuse of needing to pick up a prescription my doctor called in, and only Grey knew I was lying, but he didn’t call me on it as I made my way upstairs to get my keys.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Are you okay?”

She scans my face, and I know she’s reading all the mixed emotions in my expression, but I can’t shut her out—and I don’t want to.

Madison nods, then pulls the desk drawer open and holds up a package that clearly says Plan B, and my fist digs into my chest again.

“Where—”

“Grey heard us at some point last night, or probably me crying this morning. He drove all over today to find this. He gave it to me in the kitchen after dinner.”

Fucking Grey. I should’ve known. Solving problems is his only love language.

“I’m sorry if he overstepped…”

She places a hand over mine, and I follow her to sit on the edge of the bed.

“He did it because he loves you and kind of tolerates me.” She looks up at me with a smile that’s so sad my heart cracks in two. “His words, not mine. He also said he thinks you’d make a really great dad.”

My throat closes, but it’s for the best. I can’t influence her—it has to be her decision.

“He loves you.” She squeezes my hand, but I can’t tear my gaze away from the package in her hand.

“We’re family.” I guess it’s explanation enough because she nods.

We sit in silence for a long moment. And just when I’m about to ask her what she’s thinking, Sage knocks on the door.

“Uncle Brax? Braxton?” His knocking is incessant and so unlike him, I stand abruptly while Madison shoves the box under her pillow.

Opening the door, I find Sage shifting from foot to foot and Grey taking the stairs two at a time, and my gut sinks.

Somehow, I know they’re going to deliver bad news.

“What’s wrong?”

Madison places a hand in the center of my back, and I immediately tuck her under my arm.

“Well, I’ve been doing something I shouldn’t,” Sage says. He’s squirrely and won’t look directly at me.

“What is it, Sage?” Madison’s always so gentle with him.

“I’ve been kind of cyberstalking his family.” Madison stiffens in my arms. “You know, to make sure they’re not trying to do something shitty to you.”

“We talked about that, Sage.” I focus on him instead of what he’s found when the bad feeling rotting in my gut intensifies.

“Tell him,” Grey says. His hands are in his pockets, which means this is serious. He always hides his fists when he can’t compose himself.

“Okay, so your dad not only spread lies about Archie. He’s also trying to get the school that Anastasia is working at shut down, but he’s blaming her for it, and as far as I can tell, she’s actually invested in the kids there. And she’s been staying with a single dad whose kid goes to the school. That was shocking, but a completely other story. And now there was a fire on the farm where Archie is, and he’s been arrested for arson, but we both know that’s not his style. Plus, rumor around that small town in Maine is that he’s getting cozy with the widow and the kid.”

“What are you saying?” I ask.

“It all points back to Alistair Montgomery. At least the money trail does.”

Madison sways on her feet, and I want to kill my father for an entirely different reason. She’s got so much on her mind already, the last thing she needs is to hear about a narcissist on a war path.

“M—Montgomery?” she stutters. I flash a worried glance at Grey, who nods toward the bed, so I guide her into the room and sit with her in my lap.

“That’s my father,” I tell her. “He’s always been evil, but I had no idea he’d go to these lengths.”

Her body trembles, and I look at Grey as if he can help, but he shrugs and looks as panicked as I feel.

“It’s okay, though,” Sage says. “I hacked into his personal computer so we can stop him before he comes here.”

“Here?” Madison scrambles to get free of my hold.

“Fuck. This is too much. Can I meet you guys downstairs in a few minutes?”

Sage stares at Madison with confusion and sadness.

“Yes,” Grey says, taking Sage by the arm.

“I’m sorry, Madi. I didn’t mean to upset you.” The worry in Sage’s voice makes my anger hit new levels.

I’m so fucking tired of my own father ruining every good thing in my life.

“You didn’t,” she manages to console him just before Grey shuts the door.

“Madison, talk to me.”

Her chin is trembling, and I think I can actually hear her teeth chatter. “No, sorry. I’m fine. Really. It’s all just, it’s a lot.” She reaches under her pillow and pulls out the box—it’s the final dagger to my heart that only just learned to beat. “Honestly, go do what you have to do. It sounds serious, and I’d like to be alone for a bit anyway.” She waves the box in the air, and the pit in my stomach expands painfully.

“Right. Yeah. I’ll come back up as soon as I can, okay?”

“Actually, I—I think I should be alone tonight.” She stares at the floor as the world crashes down around us.

“Are you sure?” I choke out. “Madison, I meant it when I said I’m here for you, okay?”

“I know. I’m… It’s been a long day. I’m tired. I’ll see you in the morning, all right?”

I nod even though she doesn’t see it.

“Can I at least hug you before I go?”

She nods, but she’s shivering, and I know she’s crying before I touch her.

“It’s okay. We will be okay.” My words do nothing to console her. And when I leave her room that night, it’s with the awful fear that once morning comes, nothing will be the same.