???'s POV
I can still feel Hanni's hands on my face, so soft, so warm, like I was finally being allowed to rest after a lifetime of wandering in darkness. The words she said were simple, but in that moment, they felt like everything.
"Then, do you want to come with me?" she had asked, as if she was giving me a choice, as if I actually had a say in what came next.
But I didn't know if I had anything left to give. I had nothing but pain to offer, and yet... Hanni, so pure in her kindness, extended a hand to me, offering me a place to belong when I had nothing left but myself.
I could've said no. I could've refused and kept walking down the path I'd known for so long. But instead, I clung to her. To the only person who seemed to care. I let myself be pulled into her warmth. I wanted to be with her, more than I had wanted anything in so long.
"I will convince the others. They won't have any problem, I guess." Hanni said with a quiet confidence, and I believed her.
When we arrived at her home, I wasn't sure what I expected. I understood, of course. I was just a stranger. They didn't know me, and I didn't know them. How could they accept me so easily?
But Hanni was persistent, she stood by me. And in the end, they gave in, though I never felt completely at home, not at first. I was a ghost in their lives, just drifting from room to room, trying to find something familiar that would help me stay tethered to this new reality Hanni had pulled me into.
But through it all, there was Hanni, the only person I trusted with every part of myself. She made me feel like I belonged, even when I wasn't sure who I was anymore.
I didn't go anywhere without her. I followed her everywhere, like a shadow that couldn't bear to be apart from its source of light.
She was my safe place. And no matter where we were, no matter how much time passed, I stayed close to her. Because, deep down, I knew she was the only one who could pull me back from the edge.
-
"Don't you like the rain?" Hanni asked. She stood in the middle of the yard, as the rain poured down around her. It was one of those rare moments when the world seemed to quiet, when everything outside of Hanni felt insignificant.
I hesitated. I always hesitated. The rain... it wasn't something I liked. It reminded me of the times I'd been alone, of feeling exposed and vulnerable. Every drop on my skin felt like a reminder that I was fragile, that I could break at any moment. And worse, I had to take another shower after it.
But when I looked at her, those soft eyes. How could I possibly say no? Not when she had that look on her face, so hopeful. I couldn't bring myself to disappoint her.
I walked toward her slowly, and as if the universe itself had smiled on us, I found myself standing there, by her side, in the rain. I wasn't really participating, more like a passive observer, but just being near her... it was enough.
Then, she started spinning, laughing as she let herself be free in the rain, and for a brief moment, I almost forgot everything else.
"Come on!" she called out to me, "Join me!"
And there it was, her open invitation. But I was awkward. I didn't know how to dance. I had never been able to just let go, not like her. But she held her hand out to me, I couldn't refuse her like that.
I took a deep breath and, as stiff and unsure as I was, I started moving. At first, I was clumsy, out of sync, but little by little, I began to let go. My movements were slow, hesitant, but they somehow matched her energy. She twirled and spun, and I mimicked her in my own awkward way, feeling the rain soak through my clothes.
Then, between laughter, Hanni looked at me, as she spoke. "When we have a house for both of us," she said, "I wonder how happy we'll be."
It wasn't just a statement, it felt like a confession to me. And I couldn't stop the smile that spread across my face. In that moment, I wanted that house more than anything. I wanted to build something with her, something permanent, something that we could call our own.
I wanted to make her happy. I wanted to give her a home where we could both be safe, where we could both belong. The idea of it was intoxicating, and I couldn't help but start to think of ways I could make it happen.
The rain didn't matter anymore. It wasn't cold or uncomfortable. It was just us, dancing together in the downpour, dreaming of a future where we could build a life, a place, where she could always smile like that.
So, as I moved alongside her, I began to imagine. I imagined a house with walls that could hold our laughter, rooms that would be filled with warmth, and a roof that would shelter us from whatever storms came our way. And with every step, with every turn I made in the rain, I knew that it was the only future I wanted.
For her. For us.
-
It was hard to believe how far Minji had come. She was recruited to be part of the Elites, a force tasked with taking down some of the kingdom's most dangerous threats. The others were so proud of her. I couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy, though not because I didn't want her to succeed. I was proud of her too, but sometimes I wished I could be more like her. More confident, more capable.
Minji, however, never left me behind. She noticed something in me that I couldn't even see myself. She saw my potential, that there was power in me that hadn't been fully unlocked. I wasn't sure if I believed her, but her faith in me was enough to make me try. She encouraged me, trained me, and slowly, I began to feel the magic in me grow.
The missions we went on together, sometimes dangerous, always exhausting, were filled with moments where I had to push myself harder than I ever had. But there was a strange comfort in knowing I was doing it with her. She never let me fall behind, always making sure I was by her side. She trusted me, and in those moments, I started to trust myself a little more.
But then came the beast.
The one we knew would be the hardest to face.
The beast, the one whose strength could tear down anyone who dared to face him. And now, Minji and I were tasked with taking him down.
I couldn't help but feel the weight of it all pressing on me. Every time I closed my eyes, the thought of going up against him made my stomach twist with fear. I wasn't sure I was strong enough, not sure if I could live up to the expectations of everyone who relied on us.
In the rare moments when we weren't preparing or strategizing, when the pressure wasn't suffocating me, I found myself seeking for Hanni. She was the one who always seemed to make the fear feel a little more manageable. When I was with her, I could almost forget what was coming.
She was my safe place. The calm in the middle of the storm.
I would find her when the tension of the mission got too heavy, when my nerves were too close to breaking. We'd walk in the gardens, or sit by the window, or just talk about anything and everything. It was enough just to have her there.
I would tell her everything, how nervous I was about the beast, how I could hardly breathe when I thought about the mission ahead. She'd listen, and in those moments, I felt like I could breathe again. Hanni never judged me for my fear. She just held my hand, looked at me with those gentle eyes, and reminded me that we'd face it all together.
And somehow, that made it feel a little more bearable.
I wasn't sure how I would handle the upcoming battle, but I knew that if I had to face the beast, I wouldn't be doing it alone. Minji had me by her side, and Hanni, even if she wasn't there in the battlefield, was my strength. Maybe that was enough. Maybe together, we could face anything.
-
The moment the decision was made, everything changed. The court of the beast had sentenced Minji to an instant death, and the weight of that choice never felt more suffocating than when I looked at Minji. Her smile broke me. It wasn't the smile I had known. "Make Hanni happy, okay?" It was thin, forced, a desperate mask she wore to hide the pain that I knew was building in her chest.
"No, what about the others... What should I say to them?" I wanted to scream, to tell her that I didn't know. I didn't know how to explain this, how to live through this, how to go on. I was beyond panicked. I didn't want to live this way.
When I finally returned, alone. Nothing was the same. Time had moved forward, but we hadn't. They left one by one. The people who were once my family, my friends, faded from my life, disappearing as the years dragged on.
And it was the silence that hurt the most. I had to watch them go, unable to stop it, unable to keep them here. Each departure left a hole in my heart, a constant reminder that I was the one who lived.
And Hanni...
Hanni was the hardest to watch. She wasn't the same person anymore. The Hanni I knew, the Hanni I loved, was no longer there. She was scared, scared of commitment, scared of losing someone precious to her. I could see it in her eyes every time we spoke, every time she looked at me, as if she was terrified of me, of what she couldn't hold on to.
Even in her final days, when the weight of a thousand years seemed to finally crush me, Hanni couldn't give anyone her true smile. Her fear kept her locked away, closed off from the world. Closed off from me.
That's when I realized, maybe it wasn't me. Maybe Minji was the glue that had held all of them together. She was the one who kept them connected. Or maybe it was all of them together. They had been a family, and without each other, everything fell apart.
If only it had been me who died in that moment, maybe they wouldn't have had to carry this agony.
Maybe they would have been alright. Maybe they wouldn't have fallen apart.
But I wasn't the one who died, and I wasn't sure if that was a blessing or a curse. All I knew was that I was alone now, trapped in a future that would never end.
I never thought that living forever would feel like such a burden.
-
Living for hundreds of years, it felt like an eternity of loneliness.
That was why, when I finally had the chance, I turned back time. I couldn't change anything significant, but I could do something to myself. I could go back, to before everything had gone so terribly wrong, before I met Hanni, before I lost my parents.
I thought I could change things, make them different this time. I couldn't prevent the pain that came with immortality, but I could change the way I lived it. So I made sure to hold onto my parents for as long as I could, even if it was only for a while longer. It wasn't much, but it was enough. I was content knowing I gave them a few more precious days, weeks, years even, than I would've in the original timeline. It was all I could give.
And then there was Hanni.
I visited her house in the forest often. Not too close, just from a distance.I wanted to stay hidden, never approaching, never speaking, because she wasn't mine to have. But she was there, and that was enough for me.
But then, something shifted. A scar appeared, deep across my abdomen, my younger self had been attacked. The timeline was being torn apart again, and I couldn't let it happen.
I ran to her house, my heart pounding in my chest, only to find it empty. Panic set in as I searched the village, my breath heavy in my throat, until finally I saw them, Minji and Hyein, carrying my younger self between them.
I stopped dead in my tracks, frozen in place.
I couldn't stop thinking about fate. No matter what timeline I was in, I would always meet them. I would always find my way to them. To Minji. To Danielle. To Haerin. To Hyein. And... To Hanni.
It was like the universe was pulling us together. And I realized, as I stood there watching them disappear into the distance with my younger self, we were bound by fate.
-
The memories started to slip away from me like grains of sand through my fingers. I tried to hold onto them, tried to remember everything, every detail, the way Hanni danced in the rain, the way we spent hours doing chores together, laughing at the smallest things. But it was getting harder. With every passing day, the memories of her became foggy, like they were being replaced by new ones. I couldn't stop it. I tried to fight it, to keep my original memories close, but sometimes they would slip out of reach, and I would be left grasping at fragments of a life I no longer remembered clearly.
I saw it happening. I saw how my past with Hanni was fading, how it was becoming... different. The way she smiled, the way her hand brushed against mine, those memories weren't the same anymore. It was like they were being overwritten by a new version of events that hadn't even happened yet.
And then there was the day my younger self was recruited into the Elites. It felt like everything had changed in that moment. It was as if the roles we once played had been flipped, where Minji and I once stood side by side, now I was watching her from afar, asking her to join the last battle.
That's why I had to be sure, sure that I was strong enough. I had to be the one given the choice in that cursed court, not Minji. I couldn't let it happen again. I couldn't let her be the one to bear that burden.
But as I stood there, watching Hanni from a distance, as the burning scar on my neck finished forming, there was a mix of regret and happiness inside me. Regret because I knew that this timeline, this version of Hanni, wasn't the same as the one I once knew. It wasn't the same life we shared. And yet, happiness, because maybe, just maybe, Hanni could be a little happier this time. All Minji and Hanni cared about at that time was no longer me.
So I made my choice.
I couldn't stay. Not anymore. I knew the inevitable was coming, and that's why, I believed in my younger self to make the decision.
With one final glance, I turned away and walked into the unknown.
It was the only way I could protect her.
-
"She did it"
Now, as my body continued to disintegrate into ashes, each moment of my fading existence became a thought.
My mind, now far removed from the world I once knew, drifted into the realm of what ifs. What if I didn't have to choose between immortality and instant death? What if I could have a normal life, one where I wasn't cursed by eternity?
What if... I could feel Hanni's kiss again? The warmth of her lips, the way she made everything seem okay, even for a short moment. That kiss... the one we never had the chance to finish, the one I couldn't savor before it was too late.
But as much as I wanted to cling to those what ifs, all I had now was the memory, and soon, even that would slip away.
Wait... who said it again? That voice in my head, urging me not to get lost in the what ifs. Was it Hanni? Or Haerin? Someone told me once, not to lose myself in the "what could have been," to let go of the regrets and move forward with what I had. To accept what was.
I couldn't quite recall who said it. Maybe it was Hanni, or Haerin. Either way, it didn't matter now.
And with that, I let go.
===
Quiz time:
Whose POV is this? ðð