Chapter 60 â The Dinner
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âFamily is supposed to be our safe haven. Very often, itâs the place we find the deepest heartache.â â Iyanla Vansant
Later That Evening
I strode into the dining hall as the Omegas set up the plates and utensils on the long table. Onsight, I sought to leave the room because my parents and older sister have taken their seats. Valerian, handsome as ever, flanked on Rainaâs left and little Adonis on her right, wiggling in anticipation for the food. The atmosphere is tense, like a tight muscle in the neck. At least around me. My growls rumbled softly in my chest, low enough to where only I could hear them. As much as I want to keep my distance from sperm and egg donors, I wonder what bullshit theyâll spew from their wretched mouths to win me back.
I took my seat next to Adonis, who smiled at me. His smile was infectious. I smiled back at him. The little beta was the only person in this room I like. I didnât like Valerian either. Although he had never directly abused me, he refused to stop Raina. He turned the blind eye to her horrific actions. He was complacent and thus earns a fraction of my abhorrence.
âDinner is ready.â Lead Omega Cassandra announced with a bow, holding a pot full of pasta while her subordinates held pots with sauce, tongs, and ladles. The silence saturated our space as we were being served. Pungent odors of anxiety were noticeable from the Omegas as they trudged towards me. I didnât say a word, nor looked at their disgusting faces. Cassandraâs eyes lingered on me before she and the others took their leave, leaving the five of us alone.
Clinks of silverware hitting ceramic played a sour, melodious tune during the meal. I waited for someone to speak while everyone avoided my gaze. My eyes trained on little Adonis; cheeks filled with pasta like a chipmunk. He reminded me of myself at his ageâspaghetti is my favorite meal. Iâd eat it daily without complaints because Ashley or Cassandra made it.
Now, it does nothing to fill the holes in my heart.
This dish used to make me feel loved. Now, it made me feel empty.
Why the hell was this dish picked for this âfamilyâ meal?
âKâKiya.â Ashley broke the silence. A pleasant, yet nervous smile tore her face as her gaze filled with fondness. I resisted the urge to throw a meatball at her face.
âRemember the first time we had spaghetti? I think you were no older than Adonis. You were so terrified of eating it because you thought the noodles looked like those earthworms in your science class.â I stared, emotionless. âIt took much convincing to get you to eat because we didnât want you to go to bed hungry. I remember your face lighting up when you took your first bite. You became such a ravenous pup that we had to stop you before you got a stomachache.â
I remember those rare, happy memories my mind clung to. One of the rare moments I remember the genuine love from these strangers. The feelings of joy and curiosity filled my senses back then. My mind wouldnât let me forget that memory. It made me feel sick. My fork poked and prodded at the floppy pasta, the thieving aroma hacking away at my appetite.
âI remember that too,â Raina spoke with a smile. âIt was one of those times Cassandra was so worried about her! The horror in her eyes when she dug into her fourth helping of spaghetti and meatballs. I was sure that Kiya would puke all night because she ate too much.â
âYour point?â I asked, raising my head. Irritation poked at me faster than my nonâexistent pleasure.
âDonât you like spaghetti anymore?â Steven pondered. âYou used to ask for it every night.â
âNo.â
The three of them clammed up, bristling in their seats. I rolled my eyes and continued to poke at my food until Valerian spoke.
âThatâs a fond memory.â His fork twirled around his noodles. âCassandra makes the best pasta dishes. The children love them, especially Adonis.â The boy mumbled in agreement, stuffing more food into his mouth. âAdonis, slow down! The food is not going anywhere.â
01:56
I sighed, annoyed. âIs there a reason you took a trip down memory lane? Because Raina told me you wanted to talk, so stop stalling.â
âRâRight. Kiyaâ¦â Ashleyâs dark eyes pleaded with me, glistening into tears. âIâm sorry. Weâre so sorry for what weâve done to you. You canât stay mad at us forever.â
âNot forever.â I arch an eyebrow. âHow about until Iâm dead?â
âYou donât mean that,â Steven responded. âWeâre still your family. We made you. Your mother gave birth to you. You carry part of us.â
âGenes, I have learned, donât make a family.â I retorted harshly, setting down my fork. âWhat I learned is that even the most poisonous people on this planet are disguised as family. Want to take a gander at who Iâm talking about?â
Raina bit her lip, grasping Valerianâs hand from under the table. Adonis was so oblivious to the tension between his family because the taste of the food made him ignorant. âWe shouldnât have hurt you.â
âThen why did you?â I demanded, glaring at every adult at the table. âWhy would people I loved so much raise their hand against me? Not once, not twice, but countless times? It got so bad that I have forgotten what a loving touch felt like.â
No one dared to utter a word, so I continued. âWhy would people who vowed to our Moon Goddess to love and care for me, turn me into a slave? What cockamamie excuse have you all cooked up to win me back?â I glared at my sister. âMake no mistake Raina. Just because you helped me during my heat does not erase the fact that
I still hate you.â
âWeâ¦Iâ¦â Ashley stuttered, failing to form a coherent sentence.
âLet me tell you what a family does.â I took out my phone, removed the case, and pulled out a picture of myself and my adoptive family. I tossed it at the center of the table. âThey took me in when I was at my worst. Instead of turning a blind eye as you all did, they worked to help me get better. Not just them, but my friends. The same people training your weak wolves. After the damage that you all inflicted on me, they worked hard to get me back to be a healthy, happy werewolf. They did what you all failed to do: love me.â
âWe love you!â Steven bellowed, gripping his fork. âWeâve always loved you!â
âSlapping the shit out of me and calling me a piece of garbage is a weird way of showing me love, isnât it?â I shouted back, infuriated. âDoing nothing as I cried in pain isnât love, you neanderthal!â
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Chapter 60- The Dinner
âWe didnât have a choice,â Ashley replied meekly, eyes in her lap. âAlpha Jonathanâs word was the law.â
#you
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had a damn choice.â I hissed, rising out of my seat. I took back my family photo and placed it back where it belongs. âYou had a choice to protect your little girl, but you didnât. Was living your lavish lives worth sacrificing your child for? Was it worth seeing her lose so much weight that shifting wouldâve killed her? You both are fucking failures as Betas and as parents.â
âKiya, letâs calm down.â Valerian suggested. My fury landed on him, burning hot with orange and red. The nerve of this man telling me to calm down! âWeâve all made mistakes and your parents and sister are trying to make amends. Holding onto the past would only hurt you more than anyone else.â
âDonât tell me what to do, Valerian. Youâre just as complacent in this mess. Youâre Neronâs best friend and you allowed him to abuse me! You never stopped your wife from hurting me, either! You never defended me or pulled her away, even though I was also your âfamily.â I mimicked air quotes on the last word. âHeck, when Raina asked for your permission to hurt me, you agreed! Youâre just as shitty as they are.â
âKiya, donât talk to Val like that. Heâs trying to help mediate.â Raina defended.
âFuck you and your husband! I hope the Beta position was worth it!â
âThatâs enough!â Steven shouted, causing all of us to look up. Even Adonis, who wasnât paying attention to the fight until his grandfather yelled. âWe organized this dinner so we could calmly talk about our issues and come to a consensus, but youâre not making this easy, Kiya. Where is your respect?â
âI lost it thirteen years ago. Never cared to get it back.â I crossed my arms. âYou donât understand what happened down in that dungeon. The horrible things that were done to me. It took me years of therapy to cope with what had happened, and you expect me to brush that away and to be your happy child again?â
âThatâs not what weâre trying to do.â Ashley stood from her seat. âLook, Celeste was my best friend. We grew up together. Losing her was like losing my sister. Iâno, we needed someone to blame.â
âI was forbidden to refer to Celeste as my aunt! Instead of blaming the rogues who took her life, you chose your little girl!â The desire to rip Ashleyâs throat apart ached in my fingers, my claws protruding out from my fingertips. I wanted her to suffer, for all of them to suffer. Their tears were nowhere near the endless tears I shed for years. That pain could never go away. When your blood betrays you, it leaves a lasting scar that would
never heal.
âNuria was my best friend. I lost her that day too. Ever cared enough to realize that?â I clapped, mocking a standing ovation. âWonderful motherly decisions youâve made, Ashley. You deserve an award for best mother in the world.â
âGoddamnit, would you stop referring to us by our first names?â Steven asked with anger etching into his aging face.
âUnless you want to be called âfuck faceâ, âsack of shitâ, âbastardâ or âfailureâ, then Iâd gladly stop.â
âBaby sis.â Raina walked over to me from her seat, regret in her eyes. âYouâre right. Weâve hurt you. We abandoned you. We werenât the family you deserve. Nothing we say could erase the past, but I want you in my life. I want to hug you and hold you as my little sister. What do we have to do to make it possible?â
âDic.â The spaghetti on my plate got cold, bitterly reminding me of the disgusting leftovers I forced myself to eat when my hunger became intolerable. âI already got the family I deserve, and they are the only ones Iâll
Chapter 60âThe Dinner
call my parents and siblings.â
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âLike hell, weâll let that happen!â My head jerked to see Ashley, now full of unjustifiable rage. Moments earlier, sadness became her mask. She ditched it and donned an expression full of fury. Her fingers dig into the table edge, cracks shaping a perfect image of her fingertips. âThey would never be your true family, and weâre not losing you again!â
âGrandma?â Adonis small voice called out, the only slice of peace in this pie of chaos. âKiya is family? What do you mean?â
My eyes widened at the child; his green eyes filled with twinkling curiosity. Ashley couldnât do what I thought she was about to do. âNo, Donny-!â
âKiya is your auntie, sweetheart.â She revealed, much to the astonishment of her daughter and sonâinâlaw. âSheâs your motherâs sister; the one we told you that was dead.â
âWhoa! Thatâs so cool!â The beta pup had a level of excitement that I couldnât match. The world around me faded into muddles and muffles. I didnât want Adonis to know that I was his aunt. An established familiar connection I wanted no part of. If the boy saw me as a stranger, then he wouldnât be affected by my departure.
Now, things have changed. Children were fragile creatures but soak up countless pieces of information like a sponge. They want love. They want their family. They want everyone to be happy because it made them happy. Adonis scampers over to me and hugs my legs, rambling that he was happy that a strong lady, like me, was his aunt. As he rambled on about his plans with me, my mind took in the gravity of what Ashley had done. Valerian interrupted our âhappy reunionâ by scooping up his son, whispering in his ear that the adults need to talk, and took him out of the room. Once the door closed, Raina exploded.
âWhat the fuck, Mom?â Raina screamed. âWhy did you just do that?â
âAdonis has a right to know and if Kiya would not say anything, then your father and I will.â
âThat wasnât your decision to make.â Valerian replied, returning to the scene of chaos.
âYou want to deprive your son of the family he has never met?â Steven asked him, eyes focused on the current Beta. âAdonis had always wanted to meet her and look at him! Heâs happy! We did you both a favor! This family wonât break apart again.â
They took away my decision to tell. How do they think they have any authority over my choices? They made my pain and suffering all about them, selfishly disregarding how I felt. They saw my anger as disrespect, not from a place of agony.
This dinner had never been about me. It was always been about my former family freeing themselves of the guilt for hurting me. Not once have Steven and Ashley acknowledged that they fucked my life up to revel in their false sense of security and pride. They threw me away to the hounds, an innocent pup, so they could live safely and happily.
They never cared about me. They wanted their messedâup family back together and they sacrificed me again. to make it happen. Instead of tossing me in the dungeons, they used Adonis as leverage. They trapped me using their grandson.
I loved children too much. There was no way I would break his heart. They knew this. Anyone could see it
with how I trained the pups.
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They have put me in an impossible situation where I couldnât find the power to get out. If I didnât hate my family before, I hated them even more now. No fraction of my heart could love them ever again. Guilt and sorrow from them outweighed my pain and trauma. Tears of sorrow and remorse were as deceitful as the trickster gods.
They never cared about me.
At all.
I couldnât cry. I couldnât weep. The anger I worked hard to bury combusted in me, a stronger heat than desire rolled into every synapse in my body.
Nothing mattered anymore. Not my mission, not my friends, nothing. The only thing that mattered is to rid my life of the very people who abandoned me.
They hurt me. And now, I was going to hurt them!
All care and rationale flew out of my head, crashing into a sickening heap. Artemisâs voice did not calm this
deadly fury slamming down a mental block from my wolf, I needed to feel this anger.
I must show these fools I was stronger than them. Better than them. That I can snuff their lives out with a single flick of the wrist. My bitter abhorrence towards my egg and sperm donors is my fuel. My purpose. Theyâre dead to me, and I was going to make that a reality.
They will pay for what theyâve done! They will feel thirteen years of my wrath and there is nothing that would stop me!
Tonight, their lives are mine!