The sound of my phone beeping drags me out of the story Iâm writing.
I smile as I text back a quick yes and slide off my bed to freshen up a bit before he gets here.
Heâs seemed a little off the past few days, so it will be good to have some time together to try and figure out whatâs wrong.
He doesnât say anything as I walk outside, met with the familiar sound of his bike. I slip behind him, far less careful than I normally am.
Weâre going to tell everyone this weekend. Soon, I wonât have to ever sneak around with him again.
We take off, and I hold him tight, just like I always do. But this time his body is tense, and he doesnât relax for the entire ride.
He takes me to my favorite restaurant on the other side of the island. Itâs a little hole in the wall that only serves fish and chips. But itâs my favorite. He holds my hand as we walk to order, but when we walk to a table, he sits across from me instead of beside me.
And heâs not meeting my eyes.
âWhatâs wrong?â I ask outright, making him finally glance up at me. But instead of telling me whatâs been up with him, all I get is a shrug.
âJust a long day,â he answers tiredly.
I nod with a frown.
Heâd been helping his dad out today fishing, but it usually doesnât beat him down like this.
âDid something happen with your dad?â
âNo,â he snaps. âFuck. Am I not allowed to have a bad day?â
My mouth drops. Noah never talks to me like that.
Before I can say anything, our food arrives, and we spend the next thirty minutes picking at it.
Neither of us says a word.
Iâm at a loss for what to say, wondering what could have happened.
âIâm sorry,â he finally says, pushing his uneaten food away from him. âI shouldnât have taken my shitty day out on you.â
âYeah, you shouldnât have,â I say with a frown, but I let him throw our trays away and take my hand.
âWant to walk?â he asks, and I nod, brushing a kiss across his cheek.
When I move back, his eyes are closed, and his face is pained.
I want to beg him to tell me whatâs wrong, but I decide to let him tell me when heâs ready.
We walk barefoot at the waterâs edge, letting the waves trickle across our feet.
I shoot him furtive stares, noting how exhausted he looks, and the dark circles under his eyes.
âNoah?â I whisper after weâve been walking for a while and not said a word. âAre you okay?â
He startles as if heâs forgotten that I was beside him.
âYeah, Iâm good,â is all he responds.
Iâm at my wits end by the time we get back to the bike and drive home.
I jump off the bike and stomp towards the door, done with his attitude.
âSky,â he calls after me. But I ignore him and trudge inside, immediately heading to my room.
Since itâs date night for Curt and my mom, and Daisyâs working, we have the house to ourselves. Good thing too since Iâm pretty sure everyone would realize that Noah and I are about to have a major loverâs quarrel. I slam my bedroom door behind me petulantly, pacing a hole in the floor. The door opens a few minutes later, signaling Noahâs followed me, but I donât look up at him. Not until heâs standing in front of me with a large box with a very familiar apple logo on it.
âWhatâs that?â I growl, caught off guard by this turn of events.
âI got you a graduation present,â he says solemnly.
âI thought we said we werenâtââ
âJust open it,â he insists.
I grab the box and place it on my bed, sliding off the top cover with trembling hands.
Inside the box is a beautiful sixteen inch laptop, their top of the line one.
âNoahâ¦what is this?â I breathe, my heart stuck in my chest at this gesture.
This computer costs money. A lot of money. Money neither of us have.
âI wanted you to have it for school. To write your stories on itâ¦â
My thoughts turn towards my Dartmouth acceptance letter, and how this is the kind of computer for a school like thatâ¦but I push that thought away. Iâve made my decision. And thereâs nothing I could ever have in life that would compare to life with Noah Fontaine
âThank you,â I finally say in a tear clogged voice.
I know I should try and convince him to take it back, but what this gift means to meâ¦I canât do that.
âI love you, Noah. Forever,â I whisper to him, and he takes the computer out of my hands and sets it on the bed before pulling me into his arms.
âForever,â he murmurs back as he holds me tightly, a shudder wracking through his body.
I donât understand whatâs going on with him, but I hold him just as fiercely, determined to give him whatever he needs to feel better.
And when weâre making love a few minutes laterâ¦I wonder why every kiss feels like goodbye.