Wendy's P.O.V
[Warning: Self-harm content present]
I knew it.
I absolutely knew he was going to break my heart, one way or another.
Just like the others.
Believe me, I knew this thing between us wouldn't last. I knew we wouldn't have a relationship. That would have been a very foolish expectation.
I'm not naïve.
The day he decided to break it off, it would have been expected. I wouldn't even be hurt or anything because it would have been a bound.
That, I was ready for.
But to be blatantly insulted by him, in my face, seconds after we shared a passionately flared kiss?
That I was not ready for.
You know what's worse?
He didn't insult me about my hair or my teeth or something miniture like that.
Nope.
He hit home. He hit home with the wrecking ball Miley Cyrus rode in that relatable song.
"We kissed, I fell
Under your spell..."
Luckily for me, this isn't the first time this happens so woo-hoo.
It ain't the second time either.
The words he said broke my heart. But funny enough, I didn't feel the pain of it breaking.
I felt nothing at all.
Guess I'm used to it.
I sat up my bed and contemplated my next move.
I need to feel something. I need to have an reaction. I don't want to feel robotic like this. I'm human.
I need to feel the pain he has excreted on me and if my heart won't supply me with that pain, I'll find other ways to induce it.
I reached over my bedside drawer and opened it.
There it lay. My best friend. My soul mate. The one who has always been there for me in hard times. The one who never let me down despite the social media protests about it.
My razor blade.
"I missed you old friend, did you?" I whispered to it as I took it out.
"I missed you more." I imagined it saying to me.
I stared at the all too familiar shiny steel in my hand.
Before I could remember the promise I made to myself the last time I did this, I put the silver blade on my arm and cut.
As usual, blood poured out as much welcomed pain coursed through my body.
A broken smile formed on my lips.
Cheers to the 27th boy to break my heart.
Hip hip, hooray.
-----
* next day *
"So I saw you met up with Tyler again yesterday?" Kimberly inquired after we greeted and hugged each other.
I felt a sharp shooting pain course through the blood vessels leading up to my heart.
"Isn't it a little too early to talk about Ty-him?" I found myself unable to say his name.
But seriously, it's like 7AM and I literally just got here. Besides, he's the last person I want to talk about.
At any time of the day.
"Is it?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.
"It is. I don't want to talk about him." I faced away from her.
"Why?"
"Because." I shortly replied.
"Because what?" She persisted.
"My 'because' had a fullstop, not a comma so that is the end of my reason." I stated matter-of-factly.
She rolled her eyes. "Why are you so tight lipped about him all of a sudden?"
I ignored her question.
"Are you ignoring me?" She tried to make me face her but I refused.
She jumped in my way, causing me to make an abrupt stop to avoid clashing into her.
"Why did you do that? You want to be squashed by my fat body?" I exclaimed.
That was the hint Kimberly, catch it.
"If that is what it would take to get you to stop ignoring me, sure." She moved out the way and went back to walking beside me.
But of course she didn't catch it. Sometimes I wish I had more intelligent and perceptible friends.
I didn't respond, neither did she persist with the topic any further. Instead the walk was silent as we made our way around the school like we usually did in the mornings before school started.
As we turned the final corner of the school's perimeter, there he was, standing like the Sun, surrounded by his friends around him like the planets in our Solar System.
His smile was carefree and unwavered.
Wherelse I could hardly smile last night.
Wherelse I drowned in sorrowful tears 'till the clock striked 12.
Wherelse I endured the burning stings of the open wounds on my arms.
I found my feet frozen in place. I couldn't bare seeing his presence.
Tormenting memories of us flashback.
His distinct smell, the gooey gel on his hair I always seem to have on my hands after a make out, his hands gripping my waist as if it was small, the dominance he extracts in a kiss as if he was the one older than me, the ear addicting moans he lets out when his hunger for me deepens, the strength he possesses when he pushes me against the wall.
"Wendy? Wendy! Hellooo, earth to Wendy..." Kimberly repeatedly waved her hands in front of my face.
"Huh?" I snapped out of my thoughts.
"Why did you stop? Let's go." She said, oblivious to the problem laying ahead.
"Let's go back." I pointed behind me with my thumb.
"Why?"
"Oh my word, could you not ask questions for once in your life? Just once?"
She opened her mouth to respond when somebody shouting cut her off.
"Wendy!" A smooth, nurtured, familiar male voice said my name.
I directed my head to the source and found Tyler jogging towards my direction.
I considered my options. If I run away, it will raise suspicions because Tyler's friends and Kimberly noticed the bold initiative Tyler decided to take.
I internally groaned. I'm forced to interact with him.
He stopped jogging once he reached me, not even panting in the slightest.
"Hey." He simply said.
A hum was my response.
"Hello." Kimberly replied.
"Can I quickly talk to Wendy in private please?" He asked Kimberly, like he usually did.
"Do I look like I want to talk to you?" I interrupted Kimberly before she could respond.
"I'm just gonna leave you guys..." She said backing away after a long silence consisting of Tyler and I staring at each other.
I was staring at him in anger but he was staring at me with remorse.
"Wendy," He started once Kimberly was completely gone, "I-"
"The only reason why I'm standing here with you is because I didn't want to raise suspicions as to why I would walk away as you called me. I don't want to talk to you so don't talk to me." I sternly said before turning around and attempting to walk away.
Keyword: attempting.
Before I could walk away, Tyler spinned me back around and smashed his lips against mine in front of the whole school.
Shit.
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