Chapter 10: Chapter Nine

Sebastian Sallow had a problem.

He could not stop thinking about Vienne Austen.

No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't possibly get her off of his mind. He tried to do so, desperately even, but she wouldn't leave. There were many things regarding her that plagued him, but one was his feelings about her.

Especially after she had almost kissed him. They were that close to it happening. And his mind had been ablaze ever since.

Ominis noticed something was off about him. He was acting a little differently, asking himself questions, getting dazed, and staring off for long periods of time. And it worried, to be honest. Sebastian had acted very strangely after he was released from Azkaban, similar to this, just much worse, but he was worried that something might have happened to trigger something.

He asked Sebastian several questions over the past couple of days, and Sebastian always answered, but his mind always seemed to be somewhere else.

"What is up with that man?" Ominis sighed to himself one day. He truly had no idea what was going on with his best friend.

But Sebastian could no longer deny that he was in love with her. He almost kissed her the other day for Merlin's sake! He loved her a lot. And he didn't know how to deal with that.

Did she love him back? Did she even like him? Did she just see him as a friend? Surely not after that almost kiss, right? She was the one who initiated it—or at least that's what it felt like. His mind was so clouded he couldn't even think straight about anything. It was the most confused he had felt since being released.

And that alone was another thing that was plaguing his mind. He felt guilty being so close to Vienne while she didn't know his past. When she didn't know what had happened and that he had been in Azkaban for ten years. It felt so unfair to her.

But he was scared, scared that she'd see him differently or want absolutely nothing to do with him after he'd tell her. Maybe word would get out, and he'd have to leave town and do things on his own. It terrified him, especially knowing that he could lose Vienne.

It didn't matter if they got into a relationship or not; Sebastian just desperately did not want to lose her in any way. But the truth could drive her away, and that kept him up at night.

But he knew that it was so unfair to her, giving him all this kindness while he wasn't telling the full truth. He thought long and hard about it but then just told himself that he was going to tell her. She deserved to know, and if he lost her, then he lost her. It was her choice, her decision. She was allowed to make whatever decision benefited her, even if that meant leaving.

So he sent her an owl, asking her to meet him that night. He was going to meet her and tell her everything; that was for sure.

Sebastian was filled with anxiety as he wrote the letter, but he knew it needed to be done. He sealed it and sent it off, taking a breath to calm himself.

***

Vienne was in her room, unable to sleep. She was reading a book to help pass the time, waiting for either something exciting to happen or for sleep to finally come her way. Ironically, moments later an owl appeared outside of her door.

She immediately stood up and opened her window as the owl dropped the letter. She had no idea who it was from, but this was interesting. Quickly, she grabbed open the letter and opened it up, slipping the note out.

"Vienne, I need to talk to you about something important. My apologies for the suddenness of this letter, but I can no longer keep this a secret from you. Please meet me in the woods so we can talk. Again, apologies for the suddenness of this letter. Best of wishes, Sebastian."

Vienne's brows furrowed as she read over the words. This hardly sounded like Sebastian normally, and that, along with the tone she picked up from the letter, meant something was certainly wrong. Sure, it was strange to meet someone so late—especially out in the woods, but it definitely sounded like this was urgent. So Vienne quickly discarded the letter, grabbed suitable clothing for the outside weather, and snuck downstairs.

She hoped nobody was awake and that she wouldn't disturb anyone's sleep. If anyone saw her sneaking through the house at this hour, she would more than likely get in trouble with her mother. So she gave extra mind to being quiet as she left the house and went into the woods, wand tucked just beneath the waistline of her skirt.

The air was brisk and slightly chill against her skin but nothing unbearable; there was a feeling in the pit of her stomach that something had gone wrong or that Sebastian wasn't okay. Her steps were filled with anxious determination as she trudged deeper into the woods, hoping to find him sooner rather than later.

Would Ominis be there? Did he know about anything that was going on? Vienne hoped greatly that the both of them were okay. Every thought and feeling seemed to play out so slowly with every step she took. She hadn't felt this anxious since her father had fallen ill before his death—and she hated to be reminded of that feeling.

But soon enough, Vienne saw Sebastian off in the distance. He was pacing back and forth, his hands tightly clasped together—clearly in distress.

She picked up her pace a little bit until she was within earshot of him. "Sebastian...?" She asked slightly hesitantly so that she wouldn't catch him off guard. It was late, and they were out in the middle of a forest at night; everything was unnerving.

The moment he heard her voice, Sebastian's head moved in her direction, snapping him out of his distressed pacing. "Vienne," he said, his tone sounding like he was relieved that she was finally here. He immediately started walking towards her, closing the distance between them. "I'm so sorry I called you out here so late, but I really do need to speak with you." He said, taking her hands into his.

"It's okay," Vienne reassured him, but her face still had confusion written all over it. "What's wrong? Your letter... It was so urgent. I'm a little worried, to be honest."

What had happened between the last time they had seen each other and now? Did this have anything to do with the kiss? Vienne hoped it had nothing to do with her, and her heart hurt at even the thought of her being at fault for it.

She searched his eyes for an answer—for anything, really. Sebastian just stood there, looking like he had things he wanted to say, but no words would leave his mouth. He swallowed thickly, holding her hands tightly.

"There's something I've been hiding from you." He finally spoke, his words accompanied by a shaky exhale. "And... It's been killing me from the inside out that I haven't been completely honest with you, and you deserve to know."

Vienne stayed silent, not wanting to push the matter. She could tell that he was anxious about telling her whatever it was, so she was going to allow him to do it on his own time. She couldn't lie and say she wasn't nervous about what he was going to tell her; her mind was racing a mile a minute trying to think of what it could possibly be. But she was going to let him do it on his own time and not press him.

"I—..." Sebastian started, the words getting stuck in his throat. "I was in Azkaban for ten years." He finally blurted out, forcing the words out of his mouth.

Vienne's eyes widened a little, absolutely shocked to hear the words that left his mouth, but she didn't say anything. It was definitely not what she was expecting to hear, but she wanted to hear what else he had to say.

Sebastian inhaled deeply. "I just want to start by saying, if you want to leave right now, please do. I won't hold it against you, ever." He spoke, his tone portraying his honesty. "I would hope that you'd allow me to explain myself, but I completely understand if you want to leave. I just feel horrible knowing I haven't been completely honest with you throughout the time that I've known you, and I just—,"

"Sebastian," Vienne said, finally cutting in. "You can explain yourself; I'm not leaving. I can't lie and say I'm not absolutely shocked, but I believe you should have the opportunity to explain yourself. So, go ahead."

She gave his hand a firm squeeze, reassuring him that he could speak freely around her. She was absolutely floored, yes, but she assumed Sebastian had a good reason for all of this, or at least she really hoped he did.

A flicker of relief passed over Sebastian's expression. He took in another deep inhale before beginning to explain. "It all started many years ago, when I was about seven years old. My parents died from a seemingly unpreventable accident, and Anne and I were left orphaned. We didn't have any other family besides my uncle, so they insisted that he take us. My uncle... he never got along with our father, his brother. I'm sure I grew up thinking he hated him." He began.

"The last thing he wanted to do was take in his brother's children, but eventually he relented, and Anne and I went to go live with him. Then, my childhood was filled with screaming, neglect, and abuse when it came down to it. It's not necessarily something I like to look back on a lot."

Vienne's brows knit together as she listened to Sebastian. To be honest, she could already sense where this was going, but the words still surprised her. Sebastian seemed like such a well-mannered man, raised by good parents—how in Merlin's name could his background have been so rough? You couldn't judge people strictly based off of appearances and acts until you truly knew them, it seemed.

"I was a difficult child, I will admit." Sebastian said, a slightly dry chuckle leaving his mouth. "But to be honest, most of it was out of rebellion. I was close with my father, while my uncle hated him. Any time he'd insult him, I'd get upset. And it never helped when he compared me to him, as if that was some sort of insult. Anne tried her best to help calm things, but it never worked. Things between my uncle and I continued to get worse."

"Then... right before our fourth year in school, Anne was cursed." As the words left his mouth, his grip on Vienne's hands tightened, as if trying to ground himself for the story he was about to tell. "A cruel man named Victor Rookwood was the one who carried it out, and Anne was never the same since. She was constantly in pain, weak, and fatigued. My heart ached more than it ever had for her. Losing our parents was hard, but seeing her in such a state hurt me more than I ever thought anything would."

"We tried everything we could think of, but nobody could help us. Solomon gave up, saying the least we could do was make sure she was comfortable. It was as if he was trying to make her okay with the idea of her death. It was sickening." His tone suddenly turned a bit colder. Clearly, he still hadn't gotten over his uncle's behavior, and that was understandable.

Vienne had heard some stories about Anne from him before, but nothing could have prepared her for any of this. "I tried desperately to find a cure. Anything I could find, I tried it. I felt more desperate than I ever had to save the last member of my family who truly loved me." Sebastian continued, trying to hold it together. "But nothing worked... So, in desperate attempts to find something, I turned to the dark arts."

He went silent for a few moments; it was a sore subject for him, even so many years later. One of his biggest regrets was going into that stupid scriptorium in the first place. "I desperately searched—to the point where Ominis and another friend of mine in school got involved. He tried to convince me to stop, and I should've listened, but I didn't. I truly believed something in the dark arts could help save my sister."

"Eventually, I discovered a relic that I thought could reverse the curse for Anne. So I went after it, despite my friends telling me not to." He said. "My mind was completely clouded, as reversing Anne's curse was the only thing on my mind. My friend tried to convince me otherwise, telling me that I wasn't myself and that the relic wasn't going to help—that it had done something to me. I almost reconsidered everything, but then Solomon showed up."

Vienne's stomach sank, already playing out the next events in her head. She had a sneaking suspicion that she already knew where this was going to go, and that was even more obvious now as he explained more.

"He took the relic and destroyed it, and to me, that was the only way I thought I could cure Anne. I lashed out, and one thing led to another. Eventually, Solomon believed that attacking not only me but my friend as well was the best solution. Things could've been handled much better on both of our parts, but things just spiraled out of control." Sebastian said with a heavy sigh, the memory still weighing heavily on his shoulders.

"He used spells I had never even seen before, trying to harm me and my friend. It was all just a disaster, and eventually my patience wore thin. I should've never done it, but... Eventually I just snapped, and I used the killing curse." As those words left Sebastian's mouth, the forest seemingly went quiet.

"I killed my uncle."

His words came out choked as he tried to hold back tears at the memory, and everything was deathly silent. Vienne knew where it was going, but she still let out a shaky exhale at the thought of it.

"I immediately regretted it, and everything since then has just been a mess." He spoke, swallowing hard to try and keep back the tears. "It's my fault, really. My friends told me Solomon had a hand in it too, and I suppose I agree, but the guilt was overwhelming. They all agreed to keep it a secret, but somehow, word got out about it, and before I knew it, I was being put on trial for murder."

"I truly thought I deserved it, and really I did. I put up no argument, no defense, and just told the truth. My friends attempted their best to tell the true story and get them to understand things but my admittance to the murder, whether it was self-defense or not, was enough for them to already have made the decision. Especially since it was with an unforgivable curse. I was sentenced to ten years in Azkaban for my crimes. Which is arguably better than life, but those ten years were like living hell on earth."

He swallowed hard again but this time couldn't stop the tears. "My sister died not too long after the sentencing, unable to bear the grief of losing our uncle and me within the same few months. I was in that hellhole for ten years. But the moment I was let out, Ominis was right by my side, and I've been living with him ever since. That's why I'm here; I'm not from some other place coming here for some time off; I—I had no other place to go."

His eyes finally met Vienne's, glazed with tears. "I completely understand if you want to leave and never see me again. I would never hold it against you. I wasn't completely truthful with you, and I should've told you much earlier, but I just couldn't bear the thought of losing you..."

"I'm sorry, Vienne. But at least you know now. I completely understand anything you do next or think I'm some sort of horrible person. I really do understand."

Vienne shook her head almost furiously, squeezing his hands tightly. "No, don't say that." She spoke firmly. "Do you truly think that lowly of me?"

Sure, she was shocked. Very shocked. But after listening to the story, she understood. "I'm shocked, yes, and that was absolutely the last thing I thought you were going to tell me, but I understand. You had a very hard life, Sebastian, and everything just came crashing down all together at the wrong time." She spoke. "But it would take me a lot to not want to be around you."

She gave him a reassuring smile, tilting her head just a little bit; her hand slid out of Sebastian's grip and up to the side of his face, cupping his cheek. It was quite the intimate act for just "friends," but she could tell he needed the comfort.

Almost instantly, Sebastian melted into her touch, leaning into her hand as if it was the first bit of physical affection he had had in years—and aside from a few hugs here and there from Ominis, it was.

He let out a little sigh, closing his eyes. "You don't know how relieved I am to hear that." He said, his tone completely changed now that he knew that she wasn't upset. "I didn't tell you earlier because I was so afraid of losing you. I just let the anxiety get the better of me when I shouldn't have."

"You'd be surprised about what people do around here and what they get swept under the rug." Vienne chuckled light-heartedly. But there was truth to her words, unfortunately.

"I guess I fit right in then, huh?" Sebastian asked sarcastically.

Vienne rolled her eyes, playfully hitting him on the shoulder with her free arm. "Don't compare yourself to the people around here. You'll make me lose interest." She joked.

Sebastian took in another deep breath. "I do have to ask—how are you so... calm?" He said, slightly confused. "Don't you have more to say? Are you not upset that I kept this from you?" At this point, he was just speaking his thoughts out loud.

Vienne pursed her lips a little, giving a small shrug. "I'm not sure. I think I'm calm... well, because I trust you." She said sincerely. "I just want to be there for you, Sebastian. I suppose I would've wanted to know earlier just to understand things more clearly, but I don't hold it against you."

In that moment, Sebastian was sure he fell in love with her all over again. There was just something about the way she spoke, what she said, her kind heart—everything just made him fall more for her than he already had.

They talked for a little while longer before Sebastian insisted that she go home now. It was late and getting colder. "I've kept you out here for far too long," he said to her.

And as always, he offered to walk her home, insisting this time because it was late and he wanted to ensure that she returned home safely. Vienne was going to decline, initially, but then figured since everybody at the house was asleep, there was hardly a chance they could be seen together. So, she accepted, and boy, did Sebastian's heart absolutely soar.

He gladly walked her back to her home, not caring how late he got back to his own. She parted with a hug and good wishes, thanking him for being so honest with her.

A huge wave of relief was over the both of them now. Sebastian, because that secret was no longer weighing on his shoulders, and Vienne, because she finally knew he was okay. As much as she wasn't expecting it, she was grateful he had been honest with her, and it made her trust him a lot more than she already did.

Once Vienne was inside, the house was almost completely dark, and she was seemingly alone. She silently crept towards her stairs so she could get to her room. But suddenly, out of the corner of her eye, she saw Ceci, carrying a candle instead of her wand.

Vienne gasped sharply as the moment startled her, her hand flying to her chest. "Ceci! You scared me!" She whispered harshly. "... What are you doing up so late?"

"I could ask you the same question." Ceci replied, raising a brow.

"I just had something to take care of." Vienne answered loosely, wanting to keep things vague. "I'll be going to bed now... Goodnight, Ceci."

She made her way towards the stairs but stopped when she heard Ceci's voice again. "Be wise with your choices, Miss Austen." Ceci spoke.

Vienne's brows furrowed, and she turned around, hearing Ceci's footsteps begin to fade around the corner. What in Merlin's name did she mean by that? "Ceci?" Vienne asked, now walking towards the corner. "What on earth did you mean by that?"

"Ceci—?" She paused the moment she got around the corner; Ceci was gone, almost as if she had vanished. The hall, that still had several feet to go, was completely empty. Ceci had a habit of doing strange things, but this was just downright weird.

Vienne let out a little breath, disturbed. What did Ceci mean by that? And why be so cryptic and... creepy about it?

Slowly, Vienne made her way back upstairs to her room, everything from that evening still heavy on her mind. All she wanted to do was just sleep the thoughts away, especially right after that.