Aurelie felt a cold hand press against her forehead and opened her eyes to the dim light of the infirmary. Karah lifted her hand, big brown eyes weary, and curls pulled back into a thick ponytail.
Low murmurs came from outside, the grounds seemed busier than usual. Security must have been increased around the castle, though it couldn't have been due to Shaelyn's actions. Aurelie let her in right through the door; no guard would have stopped her entry. She wondered if another attack had occurred, but didn't care enough to ask.
"Didn't mean to wake you," she whispered, and sat down, her fingers pressing into her wrist to feel the pulse. "You're healing quickly, and the Vera said that there are no new scales."
Aurelie sat up a little, and Karah jumped to place an extra pillow under her back. "Is there water?" she asked in a gruff voice.
"Yes, right," she turned and grabbed a jug, "here." Pouring a cup, she carefully placed it into Aurelie's hand, her fingers only slipping away because she pulled the cup out of her hand.
"Thank you."
She observed Aurelie's face for a long time, her brows furrowed, and the corners of her lips bending downward down. "There's someone from the Icelands to see you. Say she's a friend. They're keeping guards around her, and some man she brought along with her."
"They just let you pass?"
She nodded. "Well, not quite as easily as you mention, but yes, eventually they did. I studied under Vera for some time, and they called her to inspect me. There are people watching," her eyes gestured to the curtain, "but that's alright."
"Do you know what they did to my baby?" Aurelie had to ask.
"The service will be after the ball, the day after tomorrow." Karah lowered her eyes, and found something fascinating in the fingernails, looking down and clipping them against each other. "It won't be a big funeral. I heard that the council decided it would be best if just family attended, as they didn't wantâ"
"Anyone to know I was with child in the first place," Aurelie finished her sentence. "They're right."
"I thought I'd be on time, but with all the fuss about the dragon, the streets were full and I . . . I got delayed."
"You saw it happen?" Aurelie clenched her jaw and passed the cup back.
"No, I just knew that you'd need me here."
Aurelie lay back down, glancing at the dark corners of the ceiling. "I'm not sure that's true anymore, but I appreciated that you tried, Karah, I really do." She felt for her hand on the side of the bed and squeezed her fingers once she found it. "Thank you for trying."
"They're calling you the immortal queen out there now. Valice is almost entirely abandoned by the scores, but I've heard that has a little to do with her tantrum over your poisoning."
Aurelie stared at the ceiling long enough for her eyes to sting, forcing a tear. "Is she alright. I'll have to go see her soon."
"Oh," Karah waved an absent hand, "she's just fine. That dark woman put up a tent right next to her, and is keeping her company."
"She better not be up to something," Aurelie said. "Are the guards still around?"
"I believe so, though I'm not very familiar with the protocol."
Aurelie squinted in thought. "I want you to seek my father, and have him instruct the guard in charge of Valice's security to keep an eye on Niendry. She is to give her nothing to eat or drink. In fact, I want Daerious in charge of everything concerning her, and no one else is to go near Valice without him present, not even Vera."
"I'll make sure to seek the King and tell him this, but first," Karah gripped her shoulder, and squeezed, "do you think you can come with me? It'll be quick, I promise."
"Where to?" Aurelie asked, and flipped her blanket aside, her legs already dangling down the side of the bed by the time she finished speakingâanything to get away from the deathly darkness, and quiet.
"Just to the window."
A sharp pain cut through her stomach and left a hot streak of anguish behind. Aurelie held tight, and heaved a large breath, catching it in her lungs, and slowly exhaling. She poked her fingers into the soft of her stomach and stood still for a while little stars drifted in her vision.
Karah wrapped a hand around Aurelie's waist and helped her take slow steps to the window. "It's all earthly pain, and shall pass quicker than the seasons." She certainly did not refer to the emotional aspect of it.
Little lights decorated the grounds of the castle. Aurelie squinted to see where they came from and saw silhouettes of people once her eyes adjusted to the darkness and the little lights they held foregrounded their figures.
"That's her! That's the Princess!" she heard a voice call from below and all the lights as if levitating, rose in the hands of their holders. They cheered and extended their hands higher.
"They've been here since morning, once news of the attempt on your life had properly spread. All work on the town square has been halted, and they've just sat here waiting for you to wake up."
*****
The night had been particularly hard. She'd slept through the whole day, and was unable to fall back asleep after Karah left. She inspected every corner of the ceiling and the curtains that surrounded her bed, finding that the darkest corners reminded her of the state of her soul.
Every now and then her hot tears filled her eyes, and she shut them to keep herself from crying. She pressed her hand against her stomach.
In the morning the King came and started discussing the ball. He had thought about canceling, but then the council let him know that it was much too late to do that. Half the guest would already be traveling to the castle.
"We'll continue with it, but say that you are unwell," the King said, pacing around the room. He had yet to lay his eye on her for longer than a few seconds and had his fists tightened as he walked. "An assassination attempt within our own walls would sound very, very bad."
"I'm well enough to attend," she said, doubting her own words. If only Sasha were here, then Aurelie would have been out of bed and running around the castle, yesterday. "I want to attend; it was my idea, after all. Though I'm afraid," she saw the pain on his face and a knot the size of a fist formed in her throat, and she took a little pause before speaking, "the tailor will have to readjust my dress somewhat. I hope she's available tomorrow during the day.".
"Oh, she'll be available," he said, and stopped pacing, and crossed his arms behind his back, staring at her instead. "You shouldn't push yourself. We can do without you."
"I know you can," she gave him a weak, half-hearted smile, and shook her head, "you needn't worry, I want to go. I can't be cooped up between these sheets anymore, I'm afraid I'll lose my mind."
There were moments where she thought that he wanted to touch her, but instead, his hand traveled through the thickness of his hair or busied itself with a loose thread on his cloak. It looked like he struggled to contain the sympathy from escaping his green eyes, but managed to hide it better than anyone else who had entered before him.
"You've hardly been cooped. It's only been a few days."
"Felt more like weeks."
"I can ask Vera if she can tend to you in your bedroom. Plus, there's that other healer here now, Karla, I think he name is."
"Karah, yes. I met her in Redayrah, she's a seer."
"Why is it that you and I are constantly locked with fortune tellers?"
Aurelie smiled and began to straighten the folds of her blanket. "Everyone wants to have a hand in changing the future. We're the best people for the job, I suppose."
"Is that what this woman is trying to do?"
Aurelie looked up at him then and shook her head. "No. She attempted to preserve it."
"That's a first." His lip curved down in surprise. "I don't supposeâNo!" He lifted his hand up dismissively and shook his head. "I don't want to know."
"Neither do I. But I assume it turns out well for Highfire, at least. She's a patriot. Wants the country safe."
"Can never have enough of those."
He lingered around her bed for a while, fighting against the concern plastered on his face, and bit his lip as if to stop himself from talking. His green eyes glinted suddenly, and his cheeks turned a weak shade of red.
"How are you?" he finally asked the question he had come for. Whether it was filled with concern for her wellbeing or fear for the repetition of madness that she had just contained, she did not know. Probably both.
"I'm fine, truly," she said, summoning courage. "Everything that caused fear or doubt is gone. For the first time since this all started, father, I feel like I have come to terms with my purpose."
"Care to explain?"
Aurelie pasted her lips into something between a smile and the baring of teeth. "I'm going to turn the Icelands upside down."
*****
Everything turned grey from then on. Aurelie demanded that the service for Hailaâthey required a name for the plaqueâbe pushed back to before the ball. The occasion wasn't something she wanted to wait for. 'Just get it over with,' she remembered telling the King to his unreserved shock.
The service was for the King and General Donahue, and she kept herself largely out of the preparation.
Daerious and Orken attended, but they too had not been accustomed to the traditions and stepped away once the priest from the cathedral said his blessings. She was glad of it. No need to have them sulking around on her behalf.
All his words passed her ears. She just stared at the little coffin and remembered thinking that her shoeboxes had been bigger. The weather seemed cloudy, but she did not look up to make sure and did not notice the heat of the sun on her skin. Her hair sometimes swept past her face, carried by the calm wind.
Before they put the coffin on the fire, Aurelie took a nervous step forward and felt her breath seize to enter her lungs. They put the box on the iron alterâcarved with the figures of fighting dragons and packed top to bottom with sticks stillâdespite the rattled state of her mother.
Aurelie's hands reached out and then retracted. She stepped back and moved her lips to form words that belonged to nobody else's ears. Her shoulders relaxed as soon as her lips stopped moving, and she seemed finally content.
Someone took her hand and warmed it. The whole afternoon fled without notice, and as hard as she tried to remember what was said, or who the many hands that touched her belonged to, she couldn't.