Karen and Hardin both shift uncomfortably in their seats, and I concentrate on chewing the bite of potato in my mouth.
âDoes anyone have anything to talk about besides America?â Hardin rolls his eyes. I gently kick him under the table, but he doesnât acknowledge it.
Karen jumps in quickly, asking me, âHow was your trip to Seattle, Tessa?â
Iâve definitely already told her about it, but I know that sheâs only trying to make conversation, so I tell everyone about the conference and my job again. That gets us through the meal at least, as everyone keeps asking me questions in a clear effort to stay on this safe, non-ex-wife-and-ex-husband topic.
Once everyone is done with the delicious goose and sides, I help Karen take the dishes to the kitchen. She seems to be distracted, so I donât probe her for conversation as we clean up the kitchen.
âWould you like another glass of wine, Trish?â Karen asks once we all move to the living room. Hardin, Trish, and I sit on one of the couches, Landon sits on the chair, and Karen and Ken sit on the other couch across from us. It feels as if we are on teams, with Landon acting as a referee.
âYes, please. Itâs got a really great taste,â Trish replies and hands over her empty glass for Karen to fill.
âThank you, we got it in Greece this summer; it was such an amazingââ She stops midsentence. After a pause, she adds, âA nice place,â before handing Trish back her glass.
Trish smiles and gives a little air salute. âWell, the wine is excellent.â
At first Iâm confused by this awkwardness, but then I realize that Karen has gotten the Ken that Trish never had. She gets trips to Greece and all over the world, a huge home, new cars, and most importantly she gets a loving and sober husband. I really applaud Trish for being so strong and forgiving. Sheâs making a huge effort to be polite, especially given the circumstances.
âAnyone else? Tessa, would you like a glass?â Karen asks as she finishes pouring one for Landon. I look toward Trish and Hardin.
âOnly one, for the holiday,â Karen adds.
I finally give in and reply, âYes, please.â Iâm going to need a glass of wine if the day continues to be this awkward.
As she pours, I see Hardin nodding his head next to me several times. And then he remarks, âWhat about you, Dad? You want a glass of wine?â
Everyone looks at him with wide eyes and open mouths. I squeeze his hand to try to silence him.
But he continues with a wicked smirk. âWhat? No? Câmon, Iâm sure you do. I know you miss it.â
Chapter forty-seven
TESSA
Hardin!â Trish snaps.
âWhat? Iâm just offering the man a drink. Being social,â he says.
I watch Ken, who I can tell is debating whether or not to take Hardinâs bait, whether to let this become a full-blown argument.
âStop it,â I whisper to Hardin.
âDonât be rude,â Trish tells him.
Ken finally reacts. âItâs fine,â he says and takes a drink of his water.
I look around the room. Karenâs face has paled. Landon is staring at the large television on the wall. Trish downs her wine. Ken looks bemused, and Hardin is glaring at him.
Then he shows a simmering smile. âI know itâs fine.â
âYou are just angry, so go ahead and say what you please,â Ken says. He shouldnât have said that. He shouldnât have treated Hardinâs emotion in this area so trivially, like it was a young boyâs opinion that merely had to be endured for a moment.
âAngry? Iâm not angry. Annoyed and amused, yes, but angry, no,â Hardin says calmly.
âAmused by what?â Ken asks. Oh, Ken, just stop talking.
âAmused by the fact that youâre acting as if nothing ever happened, as if you werenât a massive fuckup.â He points at Ken and Trish. âYou two are being ridiculous.â
âYouâre crossing the line here,â Ken says. Jesus, Ken.
âAm I? Since when do you get to decide where the line is?â Hardin challenges him.
âSince this is my home, Hardin. Thatâs why I get to decide.â
Hardin is on his feet immediately. I grab his arm to stop him, but he shakes me off easily. I quickly set my glass of wine on the side table and get up. âHardin, stop!â I beg and grab hold of his arm again.
Everything was going well. Awkward, but well. And then Hardin had to go and make a rude remark. I know heâs angry at his father for his mistakes, but Christmas dinner is not the time to bring this up. Hardin and Ken had begun to repair their relationship, and if Hardin doesnât stop now, it will get much worse.
Ken stands up with an air of authority and asks, much like a professor might, âI thought we were moving past this. You came to the wedding?â Theyâre only feet away from each other, and I know this will not end well.
âMoving past what? You havenât even owned up to anything! Youâre just pretending that it didnât happen!â
Hardin is yelling now. My head is swimming, and I wish I had never extended Landonâs invite to Hardin and Trish. Once again Iâve caused a family argument.
âToday is not the day for us to be discussing this, Hardin. Weâre having a nice time, and you had to go and start a fight with me,â Ken says.
Hardin asks, raising his hands in the air, âWhen is the day, then? God, can you believe this guy!â
âNot Christmas. I havenât seen your mother in years, and this is the time you choose to bring all of this up?â
âYou havenât seen her in years because you fucking left! You left us with nothingâno fucking money, no car, nothing!â Hardin shouts and steps into his fatherâs face.