Until all the words are said, and all conflicts solved, peace cannot occur. Because it's not in human nature to simply stop a war nor forget it without a reason.
Morning would always follow after the night, no matter how far it seemed to be. I usually embraced those mornings, the one that made my nightmares instantly disappear with a single ray of the early sun, but that day was another story.
If it weren't for the annoying ringing of Blake's phone and those relentless rays of the light that couldn't find a better place to fall on but my eyes, I probably wouldn't have woken up this early. I waited and waited, being able to deal with the sun rays, but the ringing of his phone that had really started going on my nerves was just unavoidable. I wanted to move and crush it. Move. I couldn't move. Only when I opened my eyes completely did I realize the situation I was thrown in: or better, entangled with. Somehow, unbeknown to me, I had managed to fall asleep with Blake in the same bed. Which wasn't really that confusing like the fact that he was literally hugging the life out of me so tightly that I couldn't even move! At all.
His leg that weighed a ton held mine in place. No matter how much I tried, I just couldn't escape. His right arm had me hugged from behind, somehow trapping my own next to my chest which I also couldn't move even for an inch as I was left to wonder how the hell did we manage to get in that position.
I tried to recall what happened last night. Christmas was just as I saw it happen. A complete disaster. And in the end of it all, I didn't even get to spend it with Ayden as I had promised him. I could only think that he was really disappointed because he was really looking forward to it. It's been two years since we got to celebrate it properly and now after all that happened with Maria . . . Oh, God! What if he thought that I left with her and forgot about him? He didn't see us arguing to the end, what if he came to believe that I have abandoned him? I needed to find him.
I swung my head back mentally cursing when I realized how strong Blake's jaw was when I started to feel pain from the impact. Fuck! Why was I even surprised, he had a defined jaw so it's only normal that hitting that thing would result in me feeling pain instead. He grumbled and I smiled. At least one thing went right.
"Blake! Wake up, I need to stand up," I said and he only mumbled some incoherent words before snuggling his face in my neck making the hairs on my arms rise. That fucking tickled, especially with those breaths of his on my skin!
"Blake I'll bite off your nose if you don't let me go right this moment!" I tried again, but my complaint was followed by the moment of silence before he said only one word making me want to kill him.
"Nope."
Did he just nope me?
Slowly, not giving away anything that would give him time to prepare ahead, I moved my head forward pretending to just run from him before taking a deep breath. Knowing all too well the consequences I'd feel with my skin, I decided to sacrifice mx head for the greater good. And with all the strength I had, I swung it back, hearing a satisfying curse from him indicating that he was in pain. As if. He easily blocked my head with his arm before I could do any damage.
Nonetheless, I managed to use this change to get away from him.
"Victory!" I yelled with an enormous smile on my face, already forgetting about Blake as I waited for the words of complaint that would most definitely follow.
"I will murder you," was all he said with his voice still groggy from the sleep. I only chuckled, moving myself to a sitting position and slowly taking my legs one after another from his. Freedom.
"I don't care, I have to find Ayden, kill me later," I replied as I got away from his bed, turning my head to see him yawning.
Ups.
"Huh?" he asked, rubbing his beard that was slightly reddish.
"Sorry, you wouldn't move," I apologized for the headbutt I did earlier as he only raised an eyebrow at me.
"Really? Few words would've worked just fine," why did I have the feeling that I might be in trouble if I don't leave immediately. I used my few days of acquaintance with Blake to recognize his current personality: Fatherly Blake was back online.
Fudge!
"Well, the alarm didn't work. Why do you even have an alarm set on Christmas?" I asked and he shrugged.
"I forgot to turn it off, no reason in particular," He simply sighed and dismissed the topic, waving his free hand to chase me out. Huh, he surprisingly let me off? Was the sleepy Blake always this easy to take advantage of?
"Okay then, I need to find Ayden. I forgot about him last night. I have to find him and apologize for leaving him alone. And explain that I was here all the time," I rambled nervously and as I was about to exit Blake's room, his strong arm landed on the doors passing just barely next to my face making me gasp and immediately turn to face him. Holy. His nose looked much worse now that I've gotten a closer look at it.
When did he even get up?
"Don't you dare go out like this." Blake's voice was dangerously low, his face just an inch from mine as my backs came in contact with the cold door frame. He had that smile I came to like so much. I could never get tired from playful Blake.
I concentrated on his words instead of those lips as I tried to understand what he meant by "like that"? Then my eyes slowly moved from them towards my own body as I slowly came to realize that I wore nothing but his shirt and my underwear.
"Oh," was all that could leave my mouth.
"Yes, oh." He repeated with a grin I could not understand at the moment as I gave him my own version of I-might-have-forgotten smile.
"Oh, my god! Sorry, I'll get something to wear right this second!" I immediately exclaimed as I snuck under his arm before I started to search through his old wardrobe.
I could swear that he gave me some shorts of his, how did I forget to put them? As I came to the last drawer, I found about four or five of them so I leaned down to take the black one trying to match the color of his shirt.
"Tease," Blake mumbled as I straightened my back before turning to look at him confused by his words.
"What? Did you say something?" Maybe I misheard him or something. "I'll do something about this," he said, rubbing at his own chin, and I felt a pang of regret. I almost smashed that perfect face.
Can't really blame me; I'm a girl, after all. A hormonal girl. Bad girl, Kaley!
"Ade comes first," I mumbled to myself before putting those shorts on; for the first time in my life I was grateful for having such a petite figure that his clothes covered enough.
"Alright, I'll join you once I've dealt with my chin. Do you know where you should go?" At that moment, I exited his room as I started running around the hall before I came to the huge stairs leading to that room we were in yesterday, where I met Maria and had our conversation. I shook my head. Then I had another deep conversation with him about my parents and his sister. I shook my head again. I should stop thinking about those things now. I was okay. I was not the one to blame, Blake said so.
And then I stopped in my tracks suddenly remembering something very, very important.
I had no idea where the hell I was nor where I should go!!
"Nor do I have any idea how to get back to Blake!" I exclaimed. I only rushed here on instincts, I was not familiar with the house at all!
"C'mon Santa, don't make this any harder for me, help me," I pleaded to no one with a sigh.
"Can I help you?" an elderly voice said behind me. Seriously?
"Wow Santa, you're really fast the day after Christmas." I said with a frown before turning around as I came eye to eye with an amusing look on George's face praying that he hadn't heard my outburst.
Not Santa, but will do.
I coughed.
"I assure you that I'm not Santa, my dear." The old man said and I blushed from embarrassment, he had heard me after all. "But if I can, then I'll be glad to help you." I nodded looking anywhere but in his eyes. After our encounter and with what happened with Maria, I couldn't stand to look at his eyes. Jesus, why did I have the most complicated meetings with people that would turn out to be important in my life. He was going to be my grandfather-in-law!
"Well, I am looking for my brother, actually. Little, acting like a superhero and extremely loud. If you have seen him by any chance, can you help me?" I asked, putting a hand behind my backs nervously. Knowing Ayden, it was impossible not to spot him in a place where he was surrounded by strangers he could tell his adventures to.
"I'm quite sure that I have indeed seen a kid of that description. It's hard not to, actually. He's in the kitchen." George replied and I smiled. Damn Ade, I'm so going to kill you once I get my hold on you.
As for sibling bonds. Ha, what's that even?
"Sorry, he's a bit too cheerful at his age." I said, smiling shyly.
"Oh, not at all, it was funny to have him around in this house. I haven't enjoyed myself since Blake was a kid." His smile was a bit contagious. "Follow me, I'm actually on my way to the kitchen so I'll take you there as well."
I nodded following him. We both seemed to agree not to mention the drama from yesterday. Yeah, just pretend like it was today that we met each other.
"Thank you," I said as I followed from behind. I still couldn't believe that yesterday really happened. From the moment I came here and had that unfortunate meeting with George, through the meeting with Blake's father, Lucas, who almost threw me out and then Blake's appearance as he almost started World War III, whom I managed to calm later. Then the proposal, then me meeting my aunts, Maria and Sylas, before having an argument with them, then came the conversation with Blake. And I never got to ask him about that kiss but seeing as he never mentioned it either, I could only guess that it really meant nothing to him.
I sighed. It was pointless to think about it. It would only leave me hurt because I couldn't brace myself for something I knew was coming. Blake said it himself when he asked me to marry him the first time that we were getting together just because of our child, so that they won't have to grow up without both parents by their side. This relationship was supposed to be professional, was it not now?
"Watch out!" was all I heard, drowning in a sea of my own doubts, before something soft hit my head, but took me down nonetheless. Only one thought was on my mind at the moment while I was fallingâmy baby. Throwing all rational thoughts aside, I used my arms to shield my belly from the impact of fall, but the cold ground never came.
"Damn!" someone groaned. I heard a voice from beneath me, and my first thought was that it was floor talking. "Get off me!" it said again. I opened my eyes, seeing a guy under me. He was around Blake's age, I thought.
I realized that I knew him. It was Dylan, the guy that once flirted with me with Max. And the one warning me of the attack? I knew that voice as well.
"Oh, sorry," I said as I got up before turning around. "Max, I'm going to kill you. Very, very painful!" I slowly said, but Max already knew that my threats were the most dangerous when spoken silently. Looking around, I noticed the thing he hit me with, some fluffy toy in the shape of a ball, and I threw it from hand to hand getting used to it.
"Is there any way you'd give up on your revenge?" he asked, raising only one corner of his lips as I smiled at him, innocently. Or that's how it seemed to others.
"No way," and with that, I rushed towards him, who immediately started running away.
"Come back here, you coward! Act like a man you are!" I yelled as he passed by the doors, ignoring both confused George and Dylan who must've been confused why I was rushing. I didn't recall seeing Dylan the previous day.
It all happened in slow motion. It was something you'd see on those action movies when they wanted to show every single movement that occurred in that one particular second. I jumped, preparing to throw that fluffy ball targeted to Max while passing by the same entrance he just did. By some twisted plan of fates, Blake chose to coolly stroll in between us in that very same moment. I swear I won't be forgetting the look on his face for a while.
Noticing me, he only parted his lips with a rather bored expression on his face as if he already accepted his fate, as if he truly knew that our impact was unavoidable. I, on the other hand, couldn't stop my midair maneuver even if I wanted to, so without much choice, I slammed into him taking both of us down.
The next thing I knew, I was sprawled on top of him who only had his eyes closed and a really bad grimace indicating that he was in pain. I, on the other hand, didn't feel pain at all, having him take all the damage.
That one was most definitely not my fault.
Max. Yes, I'll blame Max.
"Blake," I said breathlessly as he opened his eyes grimacing.
After that followed his usual smack-Kaley's-head routine, making me glare his way.
"Damn it woman, are you trying to kill me today?" He groaned and I shook my head. "You could have gotten yourself seriously wounded or even . . ." He had that concerned look on his face, and I knew what he meant: our baby could have been hurt.
"Sorry," I said. He sighed, hugging me once again before sitting up with me on his lap. Was I that light to him? Who the heck manages to rise from the ground with another person on top of them?
"Are you alright? Not hurt?" he then asked.
"Yes and no, I'm not hurt," I replied, playing with my fingers. It's always him that makes me feel something. That makes me feel like this now. Guilty.
"Sorry for troubling you." Sorry Papa Blake, can you let me off if I act spoiled?
"Stop apologizing, it's all Max's fault, not yours," Nice, Fatherly Blake, I knew I could count on you. So then, Blake glared at Max. For once, we actually agreed on something. Sure, blame it on Max.
"You go ahead of me and find Ayden, I'll get your revenge on Max, shoo now." He put me down. There was it again, the Child Blake with his weird-choice-of-words combination.
"But, but . . ." Max protested before smirking when Blake took a pillow. I had a feeling I knew whatever was about to start.
"You know what this means?" he asked, playing with the pillow menacingly. "War!"
"I do." Max got another pillow. "And I have no intention of losing it!"
I most definitely didn't want to be part of it. Or I'd die.
"Go, I'll cover you!" Blake said, shielding me from Max's view. "Get her out of here grandpa!"
Huh?
"Yes, Sir!" was all George said before he suddenly grabbed my arm and pulled me out of there. "Trust me, you don't want to see the war of the Blackburns." And I hesitantly nodded as I followed behind him. Wait, war of the Blackburns? Was Max somehow related to them?
It was then that I heard sounds of crashes making me forget my previous question, failing to even notice the warm smile on grandpa George's face.
"I guess it started," he mumbled. "Welcome to our family!"
What the hell were the two of them doing?
"Don't worry about the two of them, this is nothing compared to the old days, really. One day we were having a water war and the whole mansion had gotten soaked and they destroyed the paintings. Oh, the paintings they destroyed . . . Marine made them clean the whole house because of it. She was really passionate about them."
"She must have been a scary sister to Blake, right?" I asked hesitantly, she sounded interesting.
"You know about her?" he asked in surprise and I nodded.
"Blake told me about her, well at least as much as he could. I didn't want to pressure him so it's not like I know much about her." I left the sentence hanging in the air as he smiled. Blake told me that he'll tell me one day which is why I was going to wait, there's no need for me to keep on urging him to talk about it. Losing someone dear to you invokes huge pain that just doesn't leave.
And I experienced it myself, firsthand.
"That's . . . surprising. I don't know what you did, but he never talks about her. I guess I should thank you for making him open up to you, dear," he said and I weakly blushed.
"It's nothing I guess." It was surely a coincidence. I was hurting and it reminded him of his own pain so he spoke about it. If it were under normal circumstances, I'm sure he'd keep quiet.
What did I even mean to him?
"Nothing my ass, dear," he chuckled, making me widen my eyes. I think I found out who Blake got his interesting dictionary from. "And I would like to apologize, as well."
"What? No, it's alright! You haven't done anything bad!" I rushed as I said the truth, but he simply shook his head. That man did nothing wrong to me, there was no need for me to hold resentment for him.
"Maybe, but my family did treat you terribly. My son almost threw you out, at that."
"But you didn't know and you tried to stop him, didn't you? It was maybe my fault that I came in unannounced and I didn't explain anything," I recalled Blake's words. When we do something we were not too proud of, too many scenarios go through our heads.
I needed to let go.
"Which is why it's kind of my fault for it, as well. It was all in the past, I hold no ill thoughts because of it."
"What are you talking about, dear? It's not your fault at all, don't burden it all on yourself. I'm older, so I'm wiser. Listen to me, you're not the one to blame."
So unreasonable. But fair.
"But I still destroyed the party with my speech."
"Trust me, if our family knew it all . . . Let's just say we would make a much more honest speech. We know them from some party in Austria, I can't really recall what it was. It's been two years since we met, so we thought that it might be proper to invite them like all our friends over the world, but we didn't really expect them to come. They were always traveling around the world," he explained and I weakly nodded. Yeah, I knew that.
"Kay-Kay!" I heard my brother's voice before I even saw him making me smile as he appeared out of nowhere. We were already in the kitchen, and he rushed towards me.
"Ade!" I said and caught him swinging him around. "Merry Christmas!"
"Merry Christmas too, sis!" he exclaimed, giggling. I chuckled. "We're finally spending Christmas together?" he asked and I nodded excitedly.
"Sorry for leaving yesterday, Ade. Iâ"
"Went to sleep earlier so she could get a Christmas present for you from Santa," Blake's voice interrupted me as he leaned on the doorframe staring at me intensively, my lips parted. Jesus fricking Christ, it was Blake in the caveman edition. Has he never heard of clothes? Shirts? Wait! He had some when he came down, when did he lose it?
"What did you get?" Ignoring him like it was normal to walk around the house with your torso naked, Ayden started jumping around me in excitement. I only gave Blake my best yeah-what-did-I-get look, making him grin.
"You know how your daddy and mommy got together like a family and then you two came?" Blake asked him and Ade nodded, my face palled. What was he going to say? Nothing good ever came in conversations with kids about how they came to be.
"Well your sister got someone to take care of her as well, that means you got yourself an older brother," he continued and I sighed in relief. Okay, that I could take.
"Who is it?" Ade huffed not liking the idea, making me smile in return. He was so cute and obvious sometimes.
"Me," was all Blake said before Ade smiled, excitedly jumping on Blake as he started hugging him.
"Yay, Blake is my new brother, thank you Santa, I promise I'll be a good kid next year!" he exclaimed and my eyes teared up. I just couldn't help but feel emotional when he thought so brightly about the future.
Home. Safety.
"Alright then, let's go," Blake said, getting up and coming right next to my side.
"What?" I asked confused and sighing, he only threw me across his shoulders, I was too stunned to do anything.
"To sleep," was all he simply said.
"What?"
"You saw Ayden, he's okay and all, so now we can go to sleep. That being said, will you be okay with Amy today, little man?" he asked him as Ayden nodded, more than eager to join her. Traitor!
"B-but, what?" I protested as he started moving, only then did it get to me what he had done, just like the fact that he was carrying me like a sack of potatoes on his shoulder.
Caveman Blake is bad Blake.
"It was lonely without you, every single bone in my body is aching and as my future wife, you have to help me when I need you. Who else will?"
"What?"
"Everyone, we're going to sleep, so don't expect us until dinner. Have a nice day, and merry Christmas," and with that he started walking back to his old room as George stared at us with an expression too horrified for an old guy to have. Poor man, I believed that his assumptions of sleep and those that Blake said were far more different for his heart to handle.
Me? I was left with only one word on my mind:
"What?"
Back then, I believed that going along the flow was the wrong choice, that it would simply stain us bit by bit to that point where we could no longer go back.
But that was not true. We could all stop. We could all turn around and go back. We just forgot that we had that option, as well.