They don't really
understand
Without each other
We are barely breathing'
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Panic was a whisper inside her head. Goose bumps stood on her skin, as the icy caress of fear sipped in.
"Isn't he the same boy you brought to the ANTM shoot?" Antni had a victorious smile widening her lips.
Chimdi, too shocked to respond stared at the pictures in her hand.
There were several of them. Pictures of her with TJ, of him with her, taken with a perfected focus that had her shuddering in ripe fear at the intention behind each shot.
She couldn't get herself to believe she could find herself in such situation, looking at shots of she and TJ while thinking of the worst scenarios, trying to get into the mind of the cameraman or whoever was responsible for the shots.
Is he safe? Are they planning to hurt him?
A lot of unanswered questions struck her, ones that she desperately needed to be answered. She felt like she'd been hit by a seismic disturbance.
With cold unsteady fingers, she reached for one. She could remember the moment like the patterns on her hands.
"You followed us to twelveO'club?" She whispered more to herself. The staccato beating of her heart and throbbing of her veins, deafening her.
The picture had been taken outside twelveO'club, on Elo's birthday. She'd tried to keep a straight face, while he had a wide grin adorning his face. A silent struggle going on between them, as he'd refused to let go of her hands.
Taking a close look at the picture had her stilling, before she snapped out of it. And like a girl possessed, she took hold of another picture, then another, more -- she went on, giving the pictures a critical examination.
She could feel her blood plunging in her veins, so loud her vision began to grow weary.
At that moment, Antni sprang up in panic. The smug, happy look disappearing from her face as she reached for a glass keg, containing chilled water and a cup, pouring in a good amount.
"Drink up Dee," Her voice sounded way too panicky, as she handed the glass of sparkly water to her goddaughter.
"This isn't going well." She muttered, watching the skinny girl in fear as she took small sips of the therapeutic liquid.
Chimdi took small sips off the tall glass. Waiting for her heartbeat to get to being normal and nerves to get smoothed out.
Yet she couldn't get the thought out of her head. It couldn't be, she thought, panicking. Feeling her nerves go haywire in action, she took another calming gulp.
She could tell from the little knowledge she'd acquired in cinematography class that whoever captured their moments together was skilled, and a professional. His device too, cost quite a fortune.
She could tell from how clear the shots were, though they were taken from a distance.
But the little facts weren't what had her in a state of panic. It was the revelation that stared back as she looked at the pictures splayed on the translucent desk.
It was shocking, hitting like an uninformed hurricane attack. She saw it clearly this time. Images of her were blurred, while there was a keen focus on TJ, like he was the sole purpose of why the pictures were taken.
She looked up at Antni, whose face mirrored a very scared look.
"Breath in -- there, and out. Slowly." Antni urged her on with wide scared eyes. The long lashes and heavily coated eyeliner, highlighting the roundness of them.
This time Chimdi listened, her nerves springing up whenever she thought of the intention behind the shots. If she was going to get her answers from Antni, she better be prepared.
So she downed the rest of the liquid.
"This isn't what I had in mind." She heard Antni mutter, while taking the empty glass from her to refill.
Her eyes snapped up in rage. "This isn't what you had in mind?" She fired up. "Was this only but a joke to you when you decided to meddle in my personal life?"
"Hold on a second young lady," Antni set the refilled glass down. "Do you think I'm trailing you?" When she got no response from her goddaughter, she sat back down, defeated.
She'd lost the right to earn her trust, a long time ago, she thought, fighting back a migraine.
"If you are not trailing me, then why are you in possession of these?" Chimdi gestured to the table. "Or did they just magically appear inside your drawer?"
She stood up, pacing around the bright room. The burst of pink and white sickening her.
"Listen to me Dee,"
"Don't ask me to listen when you're only going to feed me with flimsy excuses and reasons why mum asked you to do all you do!"
"G didn't ask me to trail you."
Chimdi halted in a second, turning to face her. "And so you personally decided to trail me? Fine. But why drag TJ in? Why didn't you leave him the fuck alone and focus on me since you can't help but meddle!!"
"I can't!" Antni hauled back, her balled fist secured in a free hand. "I can't because I have a zero idea of where these pictures came from."
She willed herself to keep calm. Preferring to take the calm and rational route to deal with her goddaughter. "Ireti sent them over last week. Said it was on her desk when she arrived that morning."
The revelation had Chimdi seeking for her seat. Knowing that Antni was off the list spiked up her fears a notch.
Antni, she could handle. But not a stranger or even, her own mother.
"Then who else would have a valid reason to trail me except Mum?"
"That's just what I thought," Antni agreed, pushing forward the now filled glass of water.
"Drink up." She waited for her to swallow. "G had mentioned keeping an eye on you. Once or twice. But never really settled for a genuine reason, so I ditched the idea."
Chimdi took a big gulp from the tall glass. "Why... I don't really understand. Why will she now?"
With shaky hands, she downed the water in seconds. Setting down the empty glass carefully. Her fingers entwined while she tried to regain control.
Antni took her shaky hands again. "Listen to me Dee. Whatever her intentions are, I bet they are definitely for your own good. She's probably trying to keep you safe and out of harm's way."
The skinny girl snorted.
She wasn't going to believe even a word out of her mouth.
Trust.
She didn't trust her Mother and neither did she trust her godmother.
"If she's keeping an eye on me, then she doesn't need to take shots of him. Trust me, he's totally harmless." She shook her head, trying to shake off the dread. She dreaded thinking further.
But what could her mother want from him?
She let out a gasp, an idea obviously struck her. "Oh no, don't tell me she's going to try to scare him off? What if she harms him?"
Antni hearing her, let out an easy laugh. "G can never hurt the boy. She doesn't have a reason to."
The skinny girl's head snapped up at the information. Nerves smoothed down a little. "What do you mean? Wait a minute did she tell you? Will you at least explain? Damnit!"
Antni shook her head at her. She could see in the skinny girl's eyes that she cared a great deal for the boy. Her heart warmed up at the revelation. About damn time, she thought, a smile making its way to her lips. All the years of pain and fear couldn't stand as a stumbling block.
"Why the hell are you smiling? This isn't a joke Aunty!"
"She wouldn't dare harm him," the older woman continued. "Not when he meets all the standard she's set. But that's not all though..."
"Hold on a second. Standards for what if I may ask?"
Antni ignored her question as she got busy on the notepad sitting on her desk.
"Oh no, you can't just ignore me after dumping that huge info on me!"
"That's because you won't listen." She looked up the device. "All the people you're involved with, like I mean all the people you call friends have undergone a background check from us, which includes him."
"What the hell!"
"Will you listen for once Dee!"
"No way in hell! Not until you confirm that you've not been selecting my friends for me." She paused. Trying to even her breathing, fighting back a panic attack.
She could do this. She told herself. She could listen and maybe get the answers she sort. Get to the root of the matter at hand.
"Are you trying to tell me that you chose my friends for me?" She asked calmly this time. Scared of the answer to come, yet expecting the worst.
"It's not the way you're making it to be. You chose them not us. We were just trying to make sure of your safety."
The skinny girl let out a humourless laugh. "Keep me safe from them?" She shook her head in disbelief. "They are the only safe haven from you and Mum. Be properly guided before you make up excuses."
"Let's not get into that now." Antni's fingers dug into the scalp of a perfectly installed frontal wig. "The boy you're getting so defensive of, I'll bet you my new bugatti veyron that you don't know shit about him."
Chimdi rolled her eyes, a mask to hide what she really felt. Really, she didn't know one thing about him except the snippets of childhood stories he'd shared with her. That aside, she knew nothing more.
"What do you want to know?" Antni asked when she got no response.
Everything! Chimdi so wanted to scream, but pride held her back.
"Hit me." She said instead.
"Would you be specific?"
"Your choice. You're the one loaded with infos."
Antni shook her head at the skinny girl's stubbornness. Taking the discarded blunt resting on the translucent desk between her fingers, she stared up at the girl.
"He's a rare mineral heir to a company worth billions, one spanning over three continents." She took a drag -- then another. "How's that for a hit?"
Hit? It landed on the skinny girl like a blow in the face.
If she thought she was on her way to have him unraveled, then she was in for a long ride in the dark.
A strewn picture on the desk caught her eyes. It was one of them at the beach, the day's event still evergreen in her memory.
That day, she didn't sign up for the feelings brewing hot inside her at the moment.
She reached for the picture, taking a good look at it, all the while wondering who the hell he really was.
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