I can never part myself from darkness because it is within me, a part of my existence. The darkness is always there... lingering beneath my skin, waiting for an opportunity to come forward and consume me entirely.
Mom always says light and darkness are a part of us, and we have to strike a balance between them. But how should I make her believe that I no longer have light in me? I lost that light long ago when I embraced my darkness.
I donât regret anything because I let go of my light for my Thea. My innocent little Thea... who is the light of everyoneâs life.
However, it wasnât when I lost myself to my other side.
I truly erased every trace of my light when the time demanded because I couldnât let Ella suffer. She is too kind to live with the horrors that your darkness brought with itself. And I canât put my sister through something like that because I wouldnât have been able to forgive myself knowing that I havenât protected her.
Moreover, a lot is riding on her shoulders; after all, she will lead us one day when Dad hands her the reigns.
When you accept your darkness, you detach yourself from right and wrong... evil and good... forgiveness and mercy.
The screams of agony donât bother you. The warmth of blood coating your skin comforts you. You look forward to experiencing the moment when life leaves a personâs eyes when you write death in their fate.
It is the kind of high that is hard to describe in words. The satisfaction... the pleasure... the more you experience, the more you crave it.
My sisters are too pure... their souls are filled with light, while I am the tainted one... always has been and always will be.
However, I am no longer trapped in the circle of righteousness. This darkness has given me liberation from so-called morality and all the bullshit about right and wrong that had been ingrained in our minds.
What I call right is right, and what I call wrong is wrong.
I am the Queen of darkness that rules the demons hidden in the shadows.