Settling in is difficult. There are no more than a hundred people here, and half of those people are guards. The problem with the guards is the most of them are assholes. The only ones who are not, are Derek and a few of his buddies that he was overseas with. They are the only guards with families, all the other ones are rookies from the training base not too far away from here.
They have taken a great liking to mastering the art of subtle harassment. Whenever Derek is around, they are on their best behavior. If he happens to be gone, though, they take a great liking to pushing my buttons.
On just our second day here, they had managed to try and get Viola and Remy taken away from us, saying that having gay fathers was a bad influence on children. My sister, ever the psychologist, went off on them. It made me even more grateful to have her here. Not only is she overprotective, but she is using science to make the guards back off.
Within the first week, the guards had found out that Mary is technically single. A few of them had taken a liking to that, not seeming to understand that not only is she gay, but she is three months pregnant.
Mary has just been stoic this whole time, taking Alena's advice of not walking around town, instead staying on the property. She stays by Margaret's side, walking with the other woman along the beach and even sharing a room with her.
Despite it being February, it is pretty sunny here. Viola and Remy love to play outside with some of the other children who live here, and I can never say no when Remy asks to play with his new friends.
And that's why I am now sitting in the tiny playground that sits on the sand. Remy is running around with Olivia, the two of them trying to fit both of them on the slide. Erika, another mom who lives here, is nursing her toddler, while her oldest is trying to swing on the tire swing.
They have both been great, Anna taking it in stride that I now have a boyfriend and pseudo-adopted two children. She adores Finn, the two of them bonding over their overprotectiveness. And with the house being a moderate size, we are all able to fit. Danny and Delaney both decided to stay somewhere else, though. Danny is taking the loss of his brother hard, never speaking of Jacob but his sadness is clear to everyone. Delaney just likes to be on his own, coming to visit every once in a while but keeping to himself most of the time.
"Remy really is a doll," Erika says, pulling me out of my thoughts. She is smiling, her eyes watching as Remy climbs onto the tire swing with her son, the both of them trying desperately to make it swing. "It's hard to believe that his parents just left him."
Nodding my head, I readjust Viola in my lap. She had been playing with the twins for a while, but eventually started to get cranky from being tired. Now, she is just lounging back and sucking her thumb, watching as the others play.
"Yeah, he's a sweetheart. Makes me wonder why his parents left him."
Finn and I have been questioning that for a while. Remy is so good, never really throwing tantrums. The only times he gets really upset is when he is tired and doesn't want to be left alone in his bed. It is obvious that he fears being left again, so either Finn or I will lay with him until he falls asleep.
"You are really good with him," she remarks, pulling down her shirt once her daughter is done nursing. The little girl toddles away on shaky legs, over to where the twins are playing on their blanket.
"Thank you," I say.
We sit there in silence for a while, listening to the laughter of the little kids. A few other families come to the park, mostly older siblings holding their little siblings' hands, their parents trusting them to remain safe.
It isn't until Viola is passed out and it is time for Remy's nap that Erika breaks the silence. "You guys should come over for dinner tonight. We were already having Anna, Derek, and the kids come over. You should join. We would love to have you."
"That sounds great. Thank you."
Erika smiles at my words, obviously pleased. "Alright, we will see you tonight then."
With that, I stand up, going to pick up Remy from where he is trying to climb up the slide. He protests slightly when I tell him it is time to go home but holds onto my hand as we leave the park, anyway. I wave as we pass by Erika, and Anna kisses my cheek when I walk past.
"We'll be up soon," she murmurs, giving me a small hug before letting me continue on the path.
Remy chatters the entire way, feet dragging as he walks. By the time we reach the house, he is barely awake. It doesn't take much for me to change him into some clean clothes before putting him down for a nap. He passes out as soon as his head hits the pillow. Viola sleeps in her crib a few feet away from him, the only sound in the room being their breathing.
As quietly as I can, I slip out of the room, gently closing the door behind me. Alena is the only one in the living room, her feet tucked underneath her as she reads a book. The afternoon sun shines through the room, giving a comforting lightness to the room.
Alena looks up when she hears me walk into the room, setting her book down on her lap. "How was the trip to the play ground?"
Sitting down on the couch, I pull a blanket over my lap, letting out a long sigh. "It was good. Both of them wore themselves out playing with the other kiddos." Alena nods her head at my words, a small smile on her face. Her exhaustion is clear though, reminding me of the person who has been causing her a lot of stress. "How has Mary been doing, by the way?"
She lets out a long sigh, fingers running through her dark brown hair in agitation. "The same as before. The dizziness is making it hard for her, add in the fact that she has constant fatigue, it is hard for me to take care of her. Margaret is the only one who can manage to get her to leave the house. And with the guards here being utter assholes, she is even more reluctant to go outside."
I am not the only one who has been having trouble with the guards. Along with their subtle jabs at me and their smarmy attempts with Mary, they have been majorly hitting on Alena. Some of the guards don't like her being here, their racism obvious. Others, though, are trying their hardest to pick her up.
The only guy Alena has shown interest in is one of Derek's close friend, Damien. He is the only one who ever gives her any respect. He even helped her to set up an office of her own, in the same home as his. Seeing as he was a medic in the army, the two of them have been bonding.
"Damn," I murmur, wrapping my blanket around me even tighter. The sliding glass door is cracked open, letting in some fresh air. "Is there nothing that can be done to help with the dizziness?"
She shakes her head. "Not really. She just has to ride it out. It is hard for me to even do any checkups on her. She will sit there and let me take all of my measurements but is still silent when I ask her questions. Apparently she talks to Margaret, though, because she always answers every question I ask."
"Well, at least that's something."
Alena nods her head, before going back to reading her book. The silence in the house is comforting. If it were not for the guards, this place would be perfect. Most of the people here are friendly, just as I remember from my childhood. They immediately accepted me and Finn, making it easy for Finn to get a job at the local school. There are not that many children here, I think only about ten. But, the other teacher had been about to burst, she was so pregnant. Finn had taken over for her, and the little kids here have latched onto him. I know he likes it, too. He often comes home talking about what they did in class or a funny thing one of his students said.
As if summoned by my thoughts, the front door opens, and Finn walks up the stairs that lead into the living room. A smile spreads across his face when he sees me. After slipping off his shoes, he drops down on the couch next to me, arm wrapping around my waist and pulling me to his side. Tilting up my head, I silently ask for a kiss, which he happily obliges.
Alena lets out a huge yawn, her jaw cracking. Giving a slight shake of her head, she pulls herself up from the couch, murmuring something about taking a nap before wandering out of the room.
Finn chuckles quietly at her mumbling, before turning back to look over at me. His eyes are so brown, and this close, I can see the flecks of green and yellow interspersed with the brown. The dark lashes he has just make the color or his eyes pop even more.
"What are you looking at?" he murmurs, raising his brow.
"You."
"Why?"
"'Cause I love you," I whisper, surprised by the words but not regretting them.
Finn seems just as surprised, but soon enough, his shock melts into a look of happiness. "I love you too," he says, before pressing his lips against mine. The kiss is softer somehow, more intimate than before.
Pulling away, I rest my head on his chest, comforted by his arms that wrap around me. We sit there silently for a while, both of us relaxing in the silence, not bothered or feeling the need to break it.
It is only when I hear Viola stir in her crib- just as she always does in the middle of her nap, before eventually dozing off again- that I remember what I wanted to talk to Finn about.
"Can I ask you something?" I say, my voice soft in the otherwise quiet room.
"Of course."
It takes me a minute to formulate the question in my mind, and then a lot of effort to actually ask the question. "Do you want the baby?" The question seems so simple, yet I know it truly is one of complexity.
Finn doesn't answer me for a while, and I have to tilt my head up, taking in his expression. His eyebrows are pinched together, and I can tell that I ruined the blissful moment that we had been in before. Immediately, I want to take back my words, to go back to the peacefulness that we had been sitting in.
"I don't know," he finally says, eyes meeting mine. He looks like he is struggling to articulate his words, so I stay quiet, waiting for him to put them together. "Mary doesn't want the baby, not at all. But, I don't want you to feel like you have to help me... not when we already have Remy and Viola."
His words make me sit up, grabbing his face between my hands and making him meet my eyes. "Finn Foster, I am not going to let you go through this by yourself. If you decide to take the baby, then we are going to raise them together. They deserve a loving home, and we can provide that. I'll stand by you, no matter your decision."
Finn's hands come up to wrap around mine before he turns to place a kiss on the palm of my hand. "Then I guess we better start preparing for another baby."
With a sarcastic groan, I flop back against Finn's chest, feeling as his chest rumbles from his laughter. "Damn, Viola is just starting to sleep through the night. Now, we'll have to start all over."
"Will it be worth it?" he asks, voice soft.
My mind starts to drift, thinking of a baby who will look like Finn, maybe have his auburn hair and brown eyes. Maybe even his sprinkling of freckles. My boyfriend is already amazing with Viola and Remy. He is an excellent father, taking fatherhood in stride with no preparation to help him. We have a family.
"Yeah, it'll be worth it."