Chapter 90: CH 90

I’ve been putting compresses on my face all morning and I can barely recognize.

I should be satisfied with this today, well. As soon as we had lunch, I went to visit Gabriel.

Fortunately, Gabriel did not go out and was inside the mansion.

“Daphne…!”

He greeted me enthusiastically.

“… Do you know that this is the first time Daphne has visited me since you came here?”

“Ah.”

Is it…? I didn’t know at all.

Gabriel offered me a seat with a bright smile.

Gabriel looked so pleased that I felt guilty for coming here to take advantage of him.

Gabriel had the maids bring refreshments.

It seems like it’s been a long time since I’ve seen Gabriel smile like that.

Gabriel didn’t seem to know how to love himself as much as he didn’t know how to care for and love others. He said there was no other way for him to be happy than with me.

Even if you forcefully hold on to me, who hates it, to stay by your side is also a shortcut to ruining yourself.

It’s really salty.

For Gabriel’s sake, it would be better if I disappeared from his sight.

“Gabriel. I have a request.”

My voice came out hoarse and strained.

“A request? Tell me anything, Daphne. I think it’s the first time Daphne wants something from me.”

No. There were things I had asked for from Gabriel.

Save Cesare, save Cesare, and let me go.

But it looked like he had forgotten all of those things. It’s probably a request he didn’t intend to grant in the first place.

“… There was alcohol that I bought from Kazakh in the past. There was a clear drink in a green glass bottle… I want to drink it, Gabriel.”

“Alcohol?”

“Yes. The merchant told me that the person who brought it to me had a lot of unusual things in circulation. I’d like to meet that person. Can you find it for me?”

“Why is that person…”

“I am bored here. I have nothing to do, so I thought I’d get some weird stuff. I’ve seen things that make voices come out when you press a button, and… The alcohol is delicious. Is that a problem?”

“No! I’m glad Daphne seems to have recovered. I will send someone to find out right away.”

“Thank you, Gabriel.”

Gabriel was looking at me with anticipation.

“Now I’ll take my…”

“Can we have dinner together?”

Gabriel cut off my words and said. It seems that he was still hesitating to say that.

Gabriel was looking at me with sorrowful eyes. There was still a heart that hated Gabriel and a heart that felt sorry for him.

The events of the early morning had somewhat resolved my antipathy toward Gabrielle.

Gabriel sent Cesare back safely. He could have taken him immediately to the dungeon right there.

Gabriel had done the least good for me.

Eating with Gabriel would not be pleasant. I might be suffocating.

But I was terrified to just say no. Because I feel sorry for Gabriel, who expresses such affection for me.

Come to think of it, Gabriel wasn’t the only one who didn’t know how to love. Gabriel doesn’t even know what kind of love he has for me.

Gabriel loves me like a newborn duckling follows its mother. It wasn’t love between a man and a woman.

Gabriel’s eyes were filled with only obsession and affection, and there was no desire for me.

He’s a man who gets on my nerves in so many ways.

Maybe that’s why I’d backed away from him before.

Eventually, I accepted.

“… I think dinner will be fine.”

Gabriel smiled like he had anything in the world.

I want you to be happy with someone other than me who really cares for you.

This is sincere. It seems like it will take a long time though.

*****

As expected, dinner time with Gabriel was suffocating.

Gabriel put the food on my plate and watched my reaction, not even thinking about his meal.

“I eat Gabriel too.”

“Yes!”

As I said, I only took one bite.

“… I’ll take care of myself, so Gabriel eats your meal.”

“Oh, are you uncomfortable?”

If I answered yes, would you cry? What’s so good about me?

“Gabriel’s not eating because you’re taking care of me, and it’s bothering me.”

“… Are you worried about me?”

I nodded my head slightly. Only then did Gabriel start eating properly.

I can’t believe you’re that blind. You’d be better off spending your time getting to know other people instead of clinging to me.

Surely there will be people who will truly love Gabriel.

You have a pair of soulmates too.

He has never received such affection before, so I’m not mistaken.

I bit my tongue and cut the food and put it in my mouth.

If I get out of here, should I introduce Gabriel to some decent person?

Even though I don’t want to see Gabriel again, I can’t help but feel sorry for him.

“This is also delicious. What are you going to do after dinner tonight? If you have time, let’s go take a walk with me…”

Of course, all that remains is time. What can I do when I’m stuck here? The original story was not progressing. It started out so promisingly..

It seemed that he could do anything by quickly finding that person and bringing it here.

That didn’t mean I could just go for a walk with Gabriel and enjoy the day.

I knew I needed to draw a line for Gabriel.

He was too complacent.

It was as if I had created this situation in the past to try and win Gabriel’s favor.

“I don’t think that’s possible, Gabriel.”

“Are you busy?”

There was already sorrow in Gabriel’s eyes.

Still, he asked me again what I wanted to know.

“Is there anything I need to do?”

“No. I don’t want to go for a walk with Gabriel.”

In the end, you make me say such cruel things.

Gabriel nodded with a pale face and set the dishes down.

I don’t know why I’m tormenting myself like that. I put down the dishes I ate too.

I’m going to go get some digestive medicine.

“Gabriel. There must be someone who will love you. Not me.”

“… No. There is not. There is only Daphne in this world.”

Gabriel said stubbornly.

“Daphne was the only one who laughed at someone like me. You treated me without prejudice. Even though I was a slave.”

“Gabriel… It won’t be just me. It’s because Gabriel hasn’t been through people before. Isn’t it hurting now, isn’t it hard, there must be an easy way out, why…”

“I don’t like it.”

Gabriel jumped up from his seat. There was a small resentment in the eyes looking at me.

“Why not me? Why can’t I be Cesare? Cesare has everything. He also had a family. So why do you have to be a Cesare?”

“Gabriel, that’s…”

“No. I don’t want to hear it. You will only say things that hurt me again. Please pretend you didn’t hear me asking you to go for a walk together and now I’m going to turn you down.”

“Ha… I want you to know that I don’t feel comfortable saying this, Gabriel.”

Gabriel paused and left the dining room. leaving only a warning.

“The more you do this, the more I want to kill Cesare. Please, help me not to do that.”

That bastard.

A bastard with a pretty face who chooses only bad words!

I threw the bread to where Gabriel had left, but only rolled the floor.

Wait and see. One day you’ll realize I’m right about everything, you dumbass, you punk, you idiot!

*****

Gabriel sighed. His mind was complicated. Daphne’s words stuck like nails, refusing to come out.

“Someone who will love me…”

Is there such a person?

Gabriel thought to himself.

Gabriel once lived as a slave. He lost his memory and it was when he was bred on the hunting grounds of Burstoad.

Before that, I did whatever I could to make a living on the street.

Gabriel looked down at his own hand. There were calluses all over his fingers. No royal family would have such a hand. Especially if it’s the Crown Prince.

The cracked nails that wouldn’t come back, no matter how much the maids tried and tended to them, were a reminder of the past.

All this seemed to whisper to Gabriel. Never forget your past.

Isn’t it too bizarre? A Prince with such hands. Even though the outside looks fine, the inside is full of the past.

This is probably the reason why Gabriel is said to be an unqualified Crown Prince. Even Gabriel can’t accept himself, so who can understand him?

Moreover, even the aide who risked his life to make Gabriel Emperor had urged him to keep his life as a slave a secret. Denying his life.

It was only Daphne who accepted Gabriel as he was.

“And you think I can be truly loved…?”