The only thing she could do for her parents was to offer up more joss paper to them. She hoped that they wouldnât have to worry about money in the netherworld.
She watched as the joss paper burned and became ash.
Then, she walked up to their graves and poured three glasses of wine.
She drank one glass and poured the other two glasses over her parentâs graves.
She went through the entire process; started with three glasses of wine and ended with three glasses of wine. She started packing up after she had finished paying her respects.
âDad, mom, Iâll be back over the tomb-sweeping festival. Iâll visit every tomb-sweeping festival as well,â she thought.
She waved in the direction of their graves before she left this gloomy place.
She came down the hill. Her uncle lived nearby, but she didnât have any intention of visiting. She didnât even want to walk by their house, so she chose to do a detour by walking along the small pathways between the fields before she reached the main road.
There were fields on either side of the pathways but since it was winter and New Yearâs Eve, there werenât that many people toiling in the fields. The only person she spotted was Aunty Li who was her motherâs friend pulling garlic in the fields.
Aunty Li had spotted He Xiyan as well and greeted her with a happy smile. She held the garlic she had just plucked in her hand.
âYou must be Yan Yanâ¦â Aunty Li said loudly.
He Xiyan stopped in her tracks and turned to look at this woman who was in her forties. She remembered that Aunty Li used to be on good terms with her mother in the past.
âHello, Aunty Li,â He Xiyan said with a smile.
âYan Yan, you must have just come from the hill. Where would you be spending your New Yearâs this year?â Aunty Li asked.
He Xiyan smiled awkwardly and nodded.
She didnât have anywhere to go for the New Yearâs so naturally, sheâd be spending it at home alone.
She had been spending New Yearâs all alone ever since her mother passed away and this would be her third year spending it alone.
âIâm heading home now, Aunty Li. Happy New Year,â she finally said after spending some time searching for the right words to say.
Aunty Li walked up to He Xiyan, gave her a pat on the shoulder and said warmly, âYan Yan, why donât you have lunch over at my place today?â
Aunty Li noticed that He Xiyan seemed a little teary and guessed that she didnât have anywhere to go. She knew that her two uncles didnât treat her like family. They didnât even invite their niece over to have dinner together on New Yearâs Eve.
He Xiyan was touched by this kind gesture even though she knew that Aunty Li was just being polite. Her neighbors had extended more help to her than her relatives had ever done, including Aunty Li who had given her a lot of support when her mother had passed away.
âThank you, Aunty Li, but Iâve got to head to my teacherâs home for a meal,â she said awkwardly.
She wasnât actually planning to head to a teacherâs home. This was just an excuse.
She didnât want to spend New Yearâs Eve at someone elseâs home because she would feel even more sorrowful if she were to see others having a happy meal with their families.
She exchanged a few more words with Aunty Li, then headed to the main road and took a bus that was bound for Liu City.
She was all alone this New Yearâs Eve.
She turned in early that night but she couldnât sleep because of the constant sound of firecrackers and colorful fireworks outside her house.
She stood in front of the windows and clasped her hands together in a prayer position when it was almost midnight.