She had given everything to that man and lost her sense of self in the process as she tried to accommodate him in every way. She felt like she was constantly tamping down her emotions and had to be very cautious at all times.
Her next marriage happened too quickly. She didnât give this marriage enough thought before she agreed to marry Ye Hao. She also didnât spend as much time with Ye Hao, so she didnât really understand him. Nonetheless, she still convinced herself to accept his proposal and even believed that she would be happy with him.
âYou got into relationships too quickly, He Xiyanâ¦â Professor Lan called out He Xiyanâs name and looked at her solemnly.
She felt inexplicably sad after she heard what He Xiyan had been through.
âYou humbled yourself far too much during your first marriage. Perhaps it was because you had pursued your first husband, so you ended up giving in to him all the time. You didnât dare to argue or show any signs of a temper around him. You even gave in to his mother as well. Your failure to draw limits around them and your constant restraint led to them demanding more and more from you. Sometimes, humans are like this and they donât know how to appreciate the things that came too easily to them. The same logic applies to relationships. You felt very upset because they werenât grateful and your ex-husband was even seduced by another beautiful woman and turned his back on your marriage,â Professor Lan said and her words spoke to He Xiyan. He Xiyan felt her heart shudder and she bit her lips. She didnât respond but she looked down and there were tears in her eyes.
Professor Lan continued, âYou donât have to doubt your first ex-husbandâs feelings for you. Based on what youâve described of your marriage and his actions after the divorce showed that he truly had feelings for you. I could even go as far as to say that he loved you deeply. He probably only realized this after the divorce and it is likely that he wouldnât even be able to tell when he had fallen for you. However, he felt lost after you left him. Men only appreciate what they have after theyâve lost it and he was no different.â
âThere is a very big issue with him as well. In the beginning, he didnât know anything about love and relationships. He only chose to be with you not because he loved you, but because he was at the age when he wanted a womanâs company to fulfill his physical urges and to make his life more interesting. If I were to be very blunt with you, he had sexual urges back then but his upbringing and his identity led him to tamp down these urges. You appeared at the right moment and you were willing to love him wholeheartedly, including cohabiting with him before marriage. You were an obedient and well-behaved woman and this was just what he wanted.â
âSince this was how your relationship with him started, he subconsciously didnât think that he was in love with you. At the same time, he grew accustomed to your constant giving and your kindness, but he didnât have high emotional intelligence and he didnât know much about love, so he might not have realized when his feelings for you gradually started to change. He didnât even realize that his mistress was a lot like you in the past. She had taken the initiative to pursue him just like you had done and was constantly showering him with care and concern. He only started to reflect on his feelings after you divorced him and fell for another man.â