âGet inside,â he scolds me.
âDonât tellââ I begin.
âItâs cold; come inside.â Hardinâs eyes are blazing, and the heat in them keeps me from arguing. He surprises me by gently resting his hand on the small of my back as he leads me inside the house, past where Kimberly and Smith are playing some card game in the living room, and into my bedroom without a word.
Calmly, he closes the door behind him and turns the lock. Then he looks down at me, and my heart nearly bursts when he asks, âWhy?â
âHardin, nothing happened, I swear. He said there was a change of plans, and I was so relieved, because I thought he wasnât coming, but instead he said that heâd arrived a day early and wanted to grab dinner.â I shrug, partly to calm myself down. âI didnât know how to say no.â
âYou never do,â he spits, holding my gaze.
âI know you went to his apartment yesterday. Why didnât you tell me?â
âBecause you didnât need to know.â His breathing is harsh, barely controlled.
âYou donât get to decide what I need to know,â I challenge him. âYou canât keep things from me. I know about your motherâs wedding, too!â I blurt.
âI knew how you would react.â He throws his hands up, trying to defend himself.
I roll my eyes, stomping toward him. âBullshit.â
He doesnât even flinch. The veins in his arms are visible under the rare spots of white skin, soft blue laced with the black ink. His fists are tightly balled. âOne thing at a time.â
âI will be friends with who I want to be friends withâand you wonât keep going behind my back, acting like a child throwing a damn tempter tantrum,â I warn him.
âYou said you wouldnât go near him again.â
âI know. I didnât get it before, but after spending time with him today, I made my own choice not to be friends with him. Itâs not because of you.â
I can see him flinch in surprise a little at that, but he maintains his dark intensity. âWhyâs that?â
I look away, a little ashamed. âBecause I know heâs a trigger for you, and I shouldnât keep pushing you by seeing him. I know how much it would hurt me if you saw Molly . . . or any other female, for that matter. That being said, you donât get to control my friendships, but I canât lie and say that I wouldnât feel the same way if I were you.â
He crosses his arms and breathes out roughly. âWhy now? What did he do to make you suddenly change your mind?â
âNothing. He didnât do anything to me. I just shouldnât have taken this long to get it. We have to be equalsâneither of us can hold the power.â
I can tell by the glow in his green eyes that he wants to say more, but instead he just nods. âCome here.â He opens his arms for me the way he always does, and Iâm quick to wrap myself in them.
âHow did you know that I was with him?â I press my cheek against his chest. His minty scent invades my senses, pushing out all thoughts of Zed.
âKimberly told me,â he says into my hair.
I frown. âShe really doesnât know how to keep her mouth shut.â
âYou werenât going to tell me?â His thumb presses under my chin and lifts my head up.
âYes, I was, but Iâd rather have told you myself.â I suppose that Iâm grateful for Kimberlyâs honesty; itâs hypocritical of me to only want her to be honest with me and not with Hardin. âWhy didnât you come find us?â I ask. I assumed if he knew that I was with Zed, thatâs exactly what he would have done.
âBecause,â he breathes, staring into my eyes, âyou kept going on about the cycle, and I wanted to break it.â
My heart swells at his honest and thoughtful answer. He really is trying, and it means so much to me.
âIâm still mad,â he adds.
âI know.â I touch his cheek with my fingertips, and his arms tighten around me. âIâm pissed, too. You didnât tell me about the wedding, and I want to know why.â
âNot tonight,â he warns.
âYes, tonight. You got to say your piece about Zed, and now itâs my turn.â
âTessa . . .â His lips compress into a hard line.
âHardin . . .â
âYouâre infuriating.â He releases me and paces across the floor, putting a distance between us that I canât stand.
âSo are you!â I fire back, following his movements to get closer to him.
âI donât want to talk about the fucking wedding right now; Iâm already livid and barely controlling myself as it is. Donât push me, okay?â
âFine!â I say loudly, but give in. Not because Iâm afraid of what heâll say, but because I just spent two and a half hours with Zed, and I know Hardinâs anger is only serving to mask the anxiety and pain Iâve caused him by doing so.
Chapter one hundred and fourteen
TESSA
I pull open my dresser drawer and dig out clean panties and a matching bra. âIâm going to go shower. Kimberly wants to leave at eight, and itâs already seven,â I tell Hardin, whoâs sitting on the edge of my bed with his elbows resting on his knees.
âYouâre still going?â he scoffs.
âYes. I told you before, remember? That was the whole reason you wanted to come here, so I didnât have to go alone.â
âThatâs not the only reason I came,â he says defensively. I raise a speculative brow at him, and he rolls his eyes. âI didnât say itâs not a reason, but itâs not the only one.â