I stare at Nikolai, too shocked to express words. From the information I unearthed about Vladimir the past four days, I know every word Nikolai speaks is valid, but it doesnât make them any easier to hear. Vladimir is a reincarnation of the devil. He is a man whoâd rather slay the weak than offer them a hand off the ground, but murder canât be the only solution to defeat him.
I know from personal experience how deadly revenge is to an ethical mind. It wreaks havoc with the most honorable men. But more times than not, when the person seeking vengeance doesnât achieve the outcome they set out for, their thoughts turn even more sinister.
I wanted to look Col Petretti in the eyes as he took his last breath. When that opportunity was taken away from me, I felt hollow and bleak. The man who haunted my dreams was dead, but instead of being grateful, I was angry. I wanted to be the one who made him pay his penance. I wanted to show him what he did to me didnât affect me. But more than anything, I wanted to see the look on his face when my brother walked out of prison a free man. Because the best revenge you can achieve is showing those who hurt you how great your life is after youâve been scorned.
When I say that to Nikolai, the tenseness in his eyes grows tenfold. Heat crackles in the air as the tick in his jaw turns manic. Although his eyes show he doesnât appreciate my continued arguing, my campaign doesnât falter. I said mere minutes ago that Nikolai needs a person strong enough to stand next to him, not three paces back, so that is precisely what I will do.
âI understand you want revenge, Nikolaiââ
âItâs not revenge,â Nikolai interrupts, his voice gravelly and thick. âItâs taking back whatâs mine and proving Iâm more of a man than Vladimir raised me to be. You said it yourself, . I may have been born into this lifestyle, but it only became my life when I let it. Itâs time to take back whatâs rightfully mine. Killing my father is the only way I can do that.â
I still, paralyzed by my own words. I didnât realize when they stumbled out in a moment of anger that they would have such a significant impact on Nikolai. I intended to show him there is an entire world outside of his family. I didnât expect them to encourage murder.
My lips twitch, preparing to continue my plea, but Nikolai pushes his finger against my mouth. âNo more,â he commands, his tone gruffer than usual. âWe have hours, . I donât want to waste another second debating a matter not up for discussion. Iâve made my decision. Nothing you could say will change it.â
I stare at him as my brain compiles the facts. From the way he pursued me, I can confidently declare he is a determined man who goes after what he wants with a ruthless edge you canât help but admire, so the chance of me altering his mindset is practically impossible, but what sort of woman would I be if I sat back and watched the man Iâm growing to admire dwindle into half the man he is?
âYou said Iâd be worth three days in lockup, Nikolai. You never said Iâd be worth a lifetime in hell.â
I push off my feet and head for the open balcony door before Nikolai can comprehend what is happening. The sun is barely peeking over the skyline, but the fireworks raging in my gut overtake my desire to witness the ultimate Vegas light show.
After throwing a dress over my shuddering frame, I begin packing my belongings. I donât know why Iâm the one leaving when this is my apartment, but my emotions are in such turmoil, my flight mode mechanism has kicked into overdrive.
âWhat are you doing?â Nikolai asks from his station at the balcony door. His tone would make grown men wet their pants, but my stupid body reacts on the opposite end of the spectrum. Iâm turned on by his deep timbre, not scared.
Sickened by the lust-craved idiot Iâve become the past thirty-six hours, I head to my closet to pull down my suitcase stored on top. Iâve barely yanked down the heavy object when Nikolai snatches it from my grasp and propels it across the room. It smashes into the far wall with a thud, proving its guarantee to withstand any amount of pressure was fraudulent.
âYou are not leaving, Justine,â Nikolai warns, his words so volatile they are spat off his tongue in rapidly fired hits.
I snap my eyes to him, the anger in them doubling from his assumption I canât leave of my own free will. There was only one time I was told I couldnât leaveâit ended with me being mauled by a dog.
âDonât tell me what to do, Nikolai. You donât own me. Nobody does.â My voice cracks with emotions at the end. I know Nikolai would never hurt me, but haunted memories are holding my vocal cords hostage.
When Nikolaiâs face lines with anger, I rush to the door, the value of my belongings not high enough to worry about leaving them behind.
A squeal bellows from my parched mouth when Nikolai beats me to the door, snapping it shut with so much violence, the wood trim around the doorjamb loosens. My lungs hunt for air when Nikolai curls around my back. His body temperature is as hot and brooding as my mood, a dangerous combination of anger and need.
âI donât take anything not willingly given, but help me God, I will fuck you where you stand if thatâs the only way youâll learn who you belong to. I may not yet own your mind, , but I own every inch of your body,â Nikolai hisses into my ear.
I arch my back, despising the way my body heightened with anticipation from the fury in his clipped tone. âA weekend fuckfest doesnât imply ownership.â
Nikolai slants toward me, turning what should be an honest declaration into a lie. âThe moment I slipped my cock into you, I asked if you understood what that meant. You said you did. Are you saying you lied?â
âNo,â I reply with a shake of my head. âI knew what you meant.â
In that instant, I became Nikolaiâs. My body knows it. Nikolai knows it. Itâs just my brain failing to get the memo.
âBut that doesnât mean Iâll sit by and watch you make a mistake you canât take back. Iâd rather run through the gauntlet again than have you kill a man for me.â
âWhen the choice is to kill or be killed, Iâd rather kill,â Nikolai snarls, his words not as volatile as earlier.
âThat canât be the only option. That canât be your only choice,â I mumble, my voice breaking into a sob.
Iâm not tearing up at the prospect of Nikolai becoming a killerâhis laidback attitude toward the potential loss of life the past four days leaves no doubt Vladimir wonât be his first hit; it is the thought of him being killed flooding my eyes with moisture.
âIf there were another option that would guarantee you the same level of safety, I would take it. But there are no other options, . You are my weak spot, and the instant Vladimir discovers that, heâll use it to his advantage.â His ominous tone plays havoc with my astuteness.
I love how protective Nikolai is. I love that in such a short period of time Iâve crawled so profoundly under his skin he is willing to do anything to protect me. But do I love those traits enough Iâm willing to let it supplant my morals? Iâd like to say no, but since I place a high value on integrity, I keep my mouth shut.
Sensing that my fighting stance is weakening, Nikolai continues chipping at my hostility. âI gave you my word that Iâd never let anything happen to you, .â He gathers my hair to the side, exposing my neck to his torturous lips. âIâm going to keep my word,â he murmurs into my ear before placing a peppering of kisses down my neckline.
âAre you sure there isnât any other option?â I mumble through a moan.
My contradictory responses canât be helped. Nikolaiâs lips are as dangerous to my ethics as his handsome face. One touch and my reservations combust as readily as my senses.
âThere has only been one time Iâve been more certain.â Nikolai locks his wintry blue eyes with mine, spearing me in place with their intensity. âIt was knowing I had to make you mine.â
I moan againâeven louder this time.
While lavishing my neck so effectively the turmoil in my stomach drops several inches lower, Nikolaiâs fingers skim the side boob my free-flowing dress canât conceal. He is barely touching me, but my skin sets on fire with every little movement he makes. Iâm practically panting, my eagerness at the swift change in our exchange leaving me breathless.
âIâll protect you and keep you safe.â
The misting of sweat on my neck amplifies when he slips his hand beneath the loose material of my dress to cup my engorged breast.
âIâll stop at nothing to ensure the world knows if they mess with you, theyâre messing with me.â Every word spoken coincides with a tweak of my nipple.
I lean into him more deeply, encouraging his pursuit no matter what objections my brain is firing. I want himâanywhere and anyhowâand no matter what the cost.
âBut first, before any of that, Iâm going to remind you who you belong to.â
The possessive growl of his words turns me on more than I could ever articulate. I should be ashamed Iâm allowing my desires for this man to overrule my astuteness, but Iâm not. Just his lips on my neck make my inhibitions falter, so what chance do I stand after hearing his pledge of protection?
None. I am defenseless to him.
âTell me you want this,â Nikolai murmurs into my ear as his hand slithers across my quaking stomach to draw me in even closer to him. I purr softly when he grinds his erection on the globes of my ass, ensuring I know what his question refers to.
âI want this,â I say in a hushed whisper, my voice full of need. âI want you.â
Youâd think continued sexual contact over a prolonged period would weaken the hold Nikolai has over me. It hasnât. Not in the slightest. His influence over my body is more powerful now than itâs ever been. The fact he switched my devastation to excitement within seconds reveals how significant it is.
âTurn around and face me. I want your eyes on me,â Nikolai demands, his voice husky with arousal.
When I do as requested without qualm, his lips curve upwards. He isnât shocked by my obedient response; he is pleased. I learned quickly that passiveness is well-rewarded by Nikolai. The more submissive I am, the more mind-hazing our interactions are.
My heart kicks into a mad beat when Nikolai crouches down in front of me. âPut your leg over my shoulder,â he requests before fisting the hem of my dress.
Not the least bit concerned two bite marks will be thrust into his peripheral vision, I curl my right leg over his shoulder, devoid of a negative thought. Nikolaiâs ardent stare ensures not a snick of hesitation thickens my blood. He idolizes me as much as I crave him, so I refuse to let two measly marks hamper our exchange.
âNow watch me eat the tastiest cunt Iâve ever eaten,â Nikolai demands before his tongue spears between the folds of my pussy.
I cry out loudly, my desire heightened beyond belief when he loses control on my throbbing sex. He sucks, licks and nibbles on my aching core, causing waves to crest in my stomach before crashing into my womb.
With my clit still sensitive from earlier stimulation, the pressure in my pussy soon becomes too great to overlook. âI donât think I can hold back for long,â I warn, my voice as colorful as my cheeks.
Nikolai smiles against my soaked sex before his effort to have me spiraling into climax doubles. He sucks down hard on my clit as his fingers join the Derail Justine Train. He pumps two fingers into me before quickly switching to three. Even stretched to a point it is almost painful, I moan on repeat, a more intelligent response beyond me. The sensation is overwhelming, charging my desire to climax to within an inch of the finish line.
âOh, God, Nikolai. I canât. I donât think I can come. Iâm too sensitive,â I mumble a short time later.
My words are whimpered with devastation. Iâm so worked up, I honestly feel over-coiled. Can an orgasm build at a rate so fast it will never break? If so, thatâs what is happening to me now.
âOhhh,â I moan in a throaty growl when Nikolaiâs teeth graze my clit before he tugs on itâhard.
The weight of my leg on his shoulder doubles when Iâm blindsided by the sudden arrival of an orgasm. My mouth dries up as perspiration beads on my skin. I convulse without reservation, my climax too powerful for a restrained reply.
âThatâs it Give it to me,â Nikolai murmurs against my quaking lips. âGive me every fucking drop of your goodness.â
I moan on repeat, adoring that he brought my climax to fruition with the same aggressiveness our exchange began with. Before Nikolai, any type of hostility was a turn-off. Now. . . I canât get enough. I relish every graze of his teeth, mark of his hand, and pounding of his cock. His touch is like a drug: the more I have it, the more I want it.
Iâm still shuddering uncontrollably when Nikolai scoops me into his arms and moves us across the room. With my lungs void of oxygen, all the weight in my body relocates to my eyelids. Iâm exhaustedâboth mentally and physically.
Not letting my tiredness impede him, Nikolai places me on the mattress on my hands and knees. My face smushes into my pillow when he raises my ass high into the air, erotically staging me for his visual pleasure. Even being the most exhausted Iâve ever been doesnât stop me cranking my neck to peer at Nikolai as I hear him unzip his pants.
âOh, sweet Jesus,â I whisper under my breath when his thick, rigid cock springs free from his jeans.
Every vein in his body is working hard to feed his manhood, making it so mouthwateringly delicious, Iâm tempted to fall to my knees in front of him and devour him with the same wickedness he conveyed consuming me. The only thing stopping me is the image of him tearing open a condom with his teeth.
I stare, mesmerized and shameless when he rolls the condom down his thick shaft. I never knew a mundane task could be so riveting. That thin sheet of latex should offer protection from STIs and pregnancy, but it is much more symbolic than that. It is the only thing stopping me from being wholly consumed by Nikolai. If there werenât a condom between us, there would be nothing between us. That is how close weâve become this weekend.
I raise my eyes to Nikolaiâs face when I feel the heat of his gaze on me. He is staring at me, hot and devoted. âIâd give up everything I have before I give this up,â he grinds out as the head of his cock dips between the folds of my pussy.
He coats himself in my arousal, his actions as enticing as his sweet-talking gaze. âA thousand men couldnât keep me away from you, Justine.â He swipes the crown of his cock over my clit, sending a jolt through my body. âSo what chance does one man have?â
Stealing my chance to reply, he thrusts into me hard. My hands clutch the bedding in a white-knuckle hold as a mangled groan rolls up my chest. Nikolai stills for a moment, giving me a chance to acclimate to the sheer girth of himâa painstaking few seconds filled with nervous excitement. Lust has thickened my blood, but I didnât miss the hidden innuendo in Nikolaiâs statement. Even guiding me through a star-detonating climax hasnât diminished his determination one bit. He is out for revenge, and his target is his father.
Just like he has for every second of every minute of every hour since Iâve known him, Nikolai puts my mind and body on opposing teams. He works my body with the knowledge a man who has only known me for days shouldnât have, immediately blurring the line between right and wrong. He drives me to the brink, proving lust is more poisonous to an ethical mind than revenge. He fucks me until Iâm just as convinced as he is.
There is no other option. His father must die, because falling in love is beautiful but it is keeping the connection alive that can make things ugly.