Chapter 1: Sunrise

Rubbing my bruises, I enter the house again. My little sister Maggie then approaches me with an icepack in hand. She's thirteen, a year younger than me, and has curly blonde hair. Looks like today she's wearing a pink dress.

Looking at me with compassion she quips, “So…What was it this time?”

“Dad found a cupcake I bought that had a unicorn on it.”

“Couldn’t you have just told him that it was for me?”

“I tried that but it had macadamias in it so he just told me I can choose whether I get a beating for acting like a fag and lying about it or for trying to kill my sister.”

Cheekily she asks, “So, what’d you choose?”

“Well, seeing as I’m still alive to tell the tale, obviously I chose that I tried to kill you, haha.”

Rolling her eyes, she walks over to me, “Very funny…Anyways, lemme see how bad it is this time.”

She then attempts to lift my shirt but I block her, “It’s not that bad. He actually went pretty light on me today.”

“You always say that…You’ve got a bad habit of pretending everything is fine when it’s not. Now show me where he hit you.”

"But it's really fine..."

"If it were you'd show me. Lift it or I will."

Reluctantly, I take off my shirt and show my wounds to her.

She seems shocked, “Samuel that’s…That looks really bad, I think you should go to a hospital.”

“It’s fine, it barely hurts.”

“No seriously, that looks really bad. You’re on blood thinners too. I really don’t think it’s a good idea to leave that untreated.”

“I’m alright…Also I’m pretty sure purple is in fashion right now so if anything he did me a favor, haha.

Looking extremely worried, Maggie tells me, “No, seriously Samuel, if you don’t go get that checked out I’m calling an ambulance.”

“You can’t do that! They’re just gonna send us to a foster home if they find out. Look, I’m fine, okay? Dad has only got it out for me and I can take it but if we go to foster care who knows what will happen? You heard the stories of what teen girls go through in foster care, right? I don’t want that to happen to you. I’m not gonna abandon you like Beth. ”

“And I don’t want you getting killed by dad just because you’re trans. I’m sure there are places we could go that’d-”

“I told you, stop calling me that! I might have some problems but I’m not like them okay? I’m your big bro and we’ll keep it like that.”

Letting out a sigh and avoiding my eyes, she answers, “Fine, just go to a doctor. If you don't, I'm calling an ambulance. Doctor Scotch is only five miles downtown. I saved up some money, I’ll call you a taxi whi-”

I then pet her head and say, “Don’t waste your money on me. It’s just five miles, if I take my bike I’ll be there in no time.”

“I don’t think you’re in any condition to-”

“I’m fine. I’ll call you when I get there.”

I then quickly pick up my wallet and keys and get my bike out of the garage. I’m in a lot of pain right now but I can’t show it until I’m at least out of view. Once I am, the pain is really starting to catch up to me.

Man…Maybe I should have borrowed the money after all. I’m in absolute agony and each step onto the pedals makes it worse.

I get off my bike.

Maybe if I push the bike for a bit it’ll get better… Yeah, let’s do that.

I then start pushing the bike, my bruises throbbing with pain each step that I take. I try to push through the pain but after a few minutes I start to feel lightheaded and lie down on the side of the street.

Maybe Maggie was right…I should have taken this more seriously. But maybe if I take a small nap I’ll get the energy back to get to Doctor Scotch. Yeah…Let’s do that.

I then take out my phone and leave a text for Maggie, ‘Will probably be late. Just gonna take a small nap, love you.’ and close my eyes as I feel my body getting heavier, until suddenly it feels like I’m being carried up.

When I open my eyes, I reflexively scream as I stare into what looks like the night sky morphed into a woman's face. It seems to have an exhausted expression, before turning wide eyed and yelling something in a language I don’t understand. There is a weird light that surrounds me as I hear multiple people chanting the same thing over and over, “Tha sinn gad ghairm Eleanor. Biodh sibh ceangailte ann am feòil na h‑ìobairt seo a‑chum gun dèan sibh seirbhis dhuinn gu sìorraidh.”

Taking a deep breath,  I start to open my eyes, it’s dark outside.

Ow, my head… I must have fallen asleep. And wait… Is it snowing? In summer?

“Oooh I’m freezing,” I say out loud, shivering. My voice sounds different. Like another person spoke. “He… Hello?” I say as I sit myself up. “Why does my voice sound like a gi…” As I look down, I notice two things. 1.  I’m naked, and 2. This isn’t my body… It’s, “A girl's body?! Wait, what is going on? Think Samuel, think. Oh, this must be a dream. Yeah, I fell asleep after that beating, and now I’m having a lucid dream, and a weird one at that. That must be it! Well, if this is a dream, I should at least have fun, right?”

A cold breeze washes over my body.

“It’s so cold, my g-. My g–. Wait, why can I not say go-, damn this is weird. G-g- why can’t I say it? G. O. D. So that works but why can’t I say g–? Al-al-AL- Well I guess that doesn’t work either… Vish-Vi-Vis, Ze-Zeu-. Wait, so I can’t say any deities' names? That’s weird, Samuel. After this dream, you should see a therapist.”

Another breeze creeps up my back. I shiver.

Sniff, “It smells like food. Pizza maybe? Also, even if this is a dream, I should probably stand up and find something to wear–” Stomach growl, “and find something to eat.” As I stand up from what looks like a stone table and take my first step, I fall face-first into the snow.

“Kyaa!” I don’t even have the time to be surprised that I screamed like a girl as I try to process the sudden stinging pain of cold snow all over my body.

“Oh, g-g- damn this is cold.” As I try to stand up, I realize that my body is not stable at all. It's like trying to stand after running in a circle for a while. My center of gravity is all off base.

Holding onto the table to prop myself up, I smell the scent of pizza again. No wait, not pizza, this is something else. It kind of reminds me of my mother’s lasagna. The smell is a lot stronger this time, it seems to be coming from behind me as my stomach growls again.

“Maybe there’s some food over there. It kind of smells nice.”

I try to walk, using the table to push me up, when my legs give out. I then notice some lights downhill from where I’m standing. Trying to walk towards them after practicing a little more on the table, I begin wobbling myself downhill. This time a lot more confident in my step. Though to an outsider, it would probably look like a baby’s first steps. About ten steps in however, I get stuck on some roots under the snow and fall again. This time, unable to catch myself, I tumble through the snow for a short distance. I’m only stopped by a thorn bush, catching me with its annoyingly painful thorns.

“Ouch! That hurt g- damn it! Aren’t you supposed to wake up before you feel any pain? What a shit dream, man.” I grumble as I stumble out of the thorn bush. Attempting to pull out the thorns, I only remove a few before noticing smaller wounds closing rapidly. Larger cuts follow suit and even the deeper thorns simply push themselves free.

“Woah, that’s kinda cool. It doesn’t even hurt anymore. Well, I guess I can’t complain anymore now, can I? And hey. At least I got down the hill faster.” Looking around, it seems the lights I was seeing were torches lighting a path. They appear to have been burning for a while.

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“I better take one with me for warmth,” I think out loud as I try to reach for one, not accounting for my smaller stature.

“Damn it. It's just out of reach. I can't get it out of the holster. Man, this would be a lot easier if I was my normal size… Maybe I can push it out from below if I find a long stick.” Looking around  the unlit part of the woods, my eyes start to adjust extremely fast to the dark. I can see as well as I would on a cloudy day–or a sunny one with my sunglasses on.

“Well, this one should be good enough,” I mutter to myself as I pick up a dead branch and drag it back to the torch. “Wow, it’s really heavy,” huff. “I thought it’d be a lot lighter.” When I get back to the torch, it takes my eyes a few seconds to adjust to the light again. It's almost blinding now.

I wonder how long it will be until I wake up…

As I lodge the torch out of its holster, it lands right in a pile of snow. Luckily, it seems to keep on burning despite that. The heat radiating from it feels great on my skin, but it doesn’t seem to be warm enough to warm my hands up.

I really need to find shelter and a nice warm bed...

At this point, I can feel my stomach growl louder, to the point that it’s starting to hurt.

“I better follow the path,” Just the thought of a nice warm piece of lasagna makes me salivate as I start to descend the hill further, following the well-lit path.

After walking for a few minutes, I notice some decorations on the trees, colorful rags, and dried herbs on a string. I can also see a clearing in the distance with a few houses and a huge bonfire.

“There must be some sort of festival! I bet they have some clothes and food to spare!” Wanting to finally warm myself and get something to eat, I rush towards the clearing–stumbling a few times on the way until I get close enough that I can hear voices.

I should probably call them over from behind a tree. I don’t want to just march in there without clothes. That just seems like a naked classroom nightmare scenario. I should also probably play up the whole innocent little girl angle and do a shy but friendly smile.

My stomach grumbles.

And I should do it fast. I'm starving.

“A bheil thu a ’smaoineachadh gun d’ fhuair sinn iad?” (Do you think we got them all?)

“Rinn sinn.  Dìreach ann an àm gus stad a chuir air an cuid.” (We did. Just in time to stop their witchcraft.)

I wonder what they're saying.  I should go through with the plan anyway and hide behind a tree.

“Agus dè mu dheidhinn a ’bhiast dìona sin?” (And what about the guardian beast?)

“Is e dìreach uirsgeul a th ’ann agus eadhon ma tha e fìor, chuir sinn stad air an deas-ghnàth aca mar sin.” (It is just a myth. And even if it is true, we stopped their ritual so we should be fine.)

They’re wearing armor, like in a fantasy game. Pretty cool. All right Samuel, time to work your charm.

I pop my head out slowly from behind the truck and smile at them. “Ehm, hello. Could you help me? I need some food and clothing.”

Na sùilean glòrmhor sin, fangan beathach. Oh god tha e fìor! Ciaran feumaidh sinn ruith! (Those glowing eyes, the fangs of a beast. Oh god, it’s real! Ciaran, we have to run!)

They stare at me widely and one of them screams something at me. I must have scared them...

Don’t worry, Samuel. You can do this. Just calm them down.

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to scare you.”

The other guard pulls out his sword, ready to attack. “Chan eil bràthair a tha mi a ’dol a mharbhadh! Seas air ais beathach!” (No brother, I'm going to kill it!)

Oh boy, this isn’t good. I better surrender.

“Please Sir, this must be a misunderstanding,” I laugh nervously while coming out of hiding with my hands in the air.

“Tha e a ’feuchainn ri ionnsaigh a thoirt air bràthair! Agus tha e gàire. Carson a tha e a ’gàireachdainn bràthair?” (Is it trying to attack, brother?! And it is laughing. Why is it laughing, brother?)

Bha thu ceart Guaidre leig leinn ruith air na comharran agam trì, dhà, aon.” (You were right Guaidre. Let's run on my mark. Three. Two. One!)

I have no idea what they’re screaming about, but I better get ready to run...

As I prepare to flee though, the two guards run into the woods away from me.

“What the fuck just happened? This dream is surreal, man. At least they’re not screaming at me anymore…”

Were they the only ones here? I don’t hear anyone else.

My stomach growls, I don’t even care anymore.

I need to eat NOW.

Starving, I follow the scent deeper into the clearing. It seems to come from the big log house in the middle. The closer I get, the more it smells like a full banquet. Following its scent, I rush up to to the building and slowly open the massive wooden door–

“OH G-GHHHHHHHHH!” I exclaim right before throwing up.

“This is no banquet! This is a massacre!” In front of me is a scene right out of a horror film. Men, women, and children were killed gruesomely. Some have been dismembered, some beheaded. One of them has his lung sticking out of his chest as if he desperately tried to keep breathing after they sliced up his torso. The women and children seem to have mostly been stabbed in the back while fleeing. One of the women seemed to have dragged herself on the floor while bleeding out to reach her child, but it seems she didn’t make it. Her arm was reached out but was not able to touch her child’s hand. Another woman and child seem to have been killed with one stab going through the mother’s body into the child she was trying to shield. The room is full of decorations and tapestries barely legible from all the blood on them, but they seem to be telling some story. In the back of the room, on what looks to be an altar, is a huge bowl. A wolf has been strung up by its tail, the jugular cut so it will bleed into the chalice.

But even though I should be horrified by this and run away, why… why… “Why does it smell so good?”

At the moment of realization that the banquet I was smelling was a massacre, I feel something pushing on my lower lip from the inside. Licking at it with my tongue, it feels like my canine teeth, but a lot longer than normal, forcing me to speak with a lisp.

“What is going on? Wait… I get it. Hahahaha, It’s just a vampire dream. Yeah, that must be it. None of this is real. Good job Samuel, you fucking idiot. You got too invested in a fucking dream,” I say as I walk towards the bowl without even noticing. Coming closer, I see that there are engravings on it that look like runes. Looking inside, there is blood and a bit of hair in it. By all means, this should not look appetizing to anyone but I’m so hungry and this bowl smells so good.

I try to pick up the bowl, but it is too heavy. Instead, I put my mouth to it, pausing just a few seconds to confirm what I am trying to do and tilt the bowl. Blood is flowing into my mouth and it is EXHILARATING. I can feel my body heat up and I don’t feel cold or hungry anymore. I just feel great.

This is the best food I’ve ever tasted; I could eat this all… As the last drop of blood leaves the bowl, I look into it in disbelief. I didn’t think that I’d drink all of this so quickly. It was good but… but, “I want MORE!”

Looking around, there is no other bowl. But there are still the corpses. I look at the people behind me and go up to some of their wounds, but the blood is all either dried, on the floor, or has coagulated. “Damn it! This isn’t nearly enough.”

In my desperation, I loot the bodies in an attempt to find any more blood, but there is none. I do, however, find some things that seem useful at least. Some coin pouches and an ornate-looking dagger in the old man’s pouch. Accepting that there is no more blood, I slump down on a stool in the corner and try to think about what to do next. As I calm down, I also feel my teeth retreating to their normal size.

“Well Samuel, this is officially starting to be a long-ass dream,” I say to myself as I absentmindedly look down at my body. I realize then that I’m staring at the naked body of a girl my age and jump up from my seat embarrassed. “Yeah, I should probably find something to cover myself with. And afterward, see a therapist because this is not normal.”

Looking for clothes that aren’t ripped and bloodied, I find a wooden chest behind the altar. I open it and find a bunch of clothes, all about my size. Three sets to be precise. There’s a white linen dress with wool garters and pantyhose, a black wool dress with some embroidery of acorns and branches on the neck and wrist area and a green silk dress with extremely long sleeves decorated with a red, blue, and yellow flower pattern around the neck. There are also leather shoes, a white linen veil, an iron circlet, and an acorn necklace made of what looks like brass.

“Hmm. All in all, pretty girly. But it’s better than nothing. It looks a lot more expensive and colorful than what the other people are wearing. I’m not sure how to put all this on though… Maybe I should try to undress one of the women to see how to put this on?”

I walk over to the corpse of a woman with red hair and a missing arm. “Ok Samuel, don’t make this weird. This is a dream; she isn’t real, and even if she were, she’s dead. So just take off enough layers to know what to do and then carry on.”

Mustering my courage, I try to pull off the first bloodied layer. I notice that she too has an acorn necklace, but hers is made of iron. “Hmm ok, it seems that you put the long sleeve thing on top of the other clothes. Oh, I see. So these weren’t three different dresses, they’re supposed to be put over one another.

“All right Samuel, two more layers, I think. Hmm. Oh, I see. So the wool one goes under the one with the long sleeves and over the linen one, so let’s take that one off too. Okay, one more, aaaand she’s not wearing a bra, so let’s just put the wool one over here to cover these up… all right… Okay, so that’s what this wool ring is for. It’s to keep the pantyhose up… I always thought it was just an accessory for brides on their wedding night. Well, either way, it doesn't matter. I know how to put this on now. But wait. If this is a dream, then why did I need to learn how to put this on and what this wool ring is for? Shouldn’t I have already known that? Hmm… maybe I already knew and just forgot. Yeah, that must have been it.”

I walk back to the chest and put on the pantyhose and linen dress, followed by the black wool one, and then on top the green silk.

“Argh, the green one is pretty tight. Ok, pull here, stretch there, and phew! Ok, I think I’m done. This fits pretty well, all things considered. I wish there was a mirror around to see what it looks like… Wait, never mind I’m a vampire, that probably doesn’t work… So, what do I do now? Feels like I should have already woken up some time ago. Maybe I should look into one of the smaller houses?”

Using the clothes of the woman I undressed, I build a little cloth bridge for me to walk over without getting my shoes or clothes bloody, and walk towards the door. On my way to it, I notice the dead woman who was reaching for her child's hand again.

“Well, even if this is a dream it’s kind of sad, so here you go,” I say as I drag the child towards the mother and lay her in her arms. “Every day, a good deed, even if it’s only in my nightmares. All right, now to open that big ass door.” As I open the door, I feel my face burning as if someone spilled hot water on it. I step back instinctively.

“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ouch, ouch, ouch oh g-g-g-grrrrrr that hurts! Fuck, ouch!” Looking at the door, I see light shining through it. Still, in pain, I take my pinky finger and slowly push it towards the light, and the moment it touches my finger it starts to burn, but not in a way where it just gets red and hurts. No, there is an actual flame burning on it. I pull it back and the fire stops. I can see bits of skin and flesh starting to slowly regrow on my finger and the pain on my face starts to ease.

“This must be sunlight. Man, this dream sucks! I’m in pain, I’m in this weird body and I just don’t wake up!” I say in desperation, as cold tears flow down my cheeks. “I’ll wake up any minute now,” I say as I sit down in a corner of the room. “Any minute now…” Yawn. “Any…