Sheena's POV
The world felt muted after Gwen was gone. Every vibrant color seemed dulled, every laugh a touch off-key. The silence in my condo was deafening, a constant reminder of the laughter that used to fill it. Moving on felt like climbing a mountain after a rockslide, the path treacherous and uncertain.
But Gwen wouldn't have wanted me to be buried under that grief. She'd want me to live, to experience all the joys the world had to offer, the joys we dreamt of experiencing together. So, I took a deep breath and started putting one foot in front of the other.
Opening my clinic was the first step. It was a long-held dream of ours, and I poured all my energy into making it a reality. The sterile scent of disinfectant and the quiet hum of medical equipment became a strange comfort, a reminder of the life I was building, the life Gwen would have been proud of.
Travel was next. The world suddenly felt vast and full of possibilities. I explored bustling metropolises in Asia, marveled at the ancient ruins of Europe, and trekked through the lush rainforests of South America. With every new place, every breathtaking vista, a tiny shard of my heart healed.
My friends became my anchors. They were my support system, the ones who held me up when I faltered, who celebrated my victories, big and small. We laughed together, cried together, and created new memories that slowly wove themselves into the fabric of my life.
And then, there was Gwyn. Gwyn Allistair - Gwyn means 'blessed' in Welsh and Allistair means 'fair or holy'. Gwyn, a little boy with eyes that held the same sparkle Gwen's did. Adopting him wasn't a replacement, but it was a new kind of love, a fierce protectiveness that filled the empty spaces in my heart. Reading him bedtime stories, watching him take his first wobbly steps, seeing the world anew through his innocent eyes â these were joys I never knew I craved. Before I adopted him, I made sure I was ready. I went to counselling and processed his papers immediately. Picking him wasn't hard. He won my heart the moment I laid my eyes on him. He's like a version of Gwen's features but embedding my personality.
I am sitting on the couch with my laptop, engrossed in work. My best friends entered with excited expressions.
"Hey, Sheena! How's your day going?" Mikha asked.
"Oh, you know, busy as usual. Just trying to finish up some work. Sinundo niyo ba si Gwyn?" I asked, looking at Colet, Mikha, and Maloi.
"Of course! Nanuod din ng ako basketball practice ni Ep eh, mapilit kasi si JR. Gusto niya panuorin kuya niya. Si Cole naman, gusto laging sumasama sa mommy niya." Colet replied.
"We've got some juicy gossip for you!" Maloi smirked while Mikha shook her head. Simula nang nalaman nila na I'm adopting Gwyn, the moment I moved into a real house, palagi na sila rito after work. Sunday is family day daw pero kahit hindi Sunday, andito pa rin sila.
"Oh really? Do tell." I smiked.
"Your little Gwyn was caught kissing a girl at school today!" My expression shifts from amusement to concern in an instant. What the hell?
"Wait, what? My Gwyn kissed a girl!?" I yelled.
"Yeah, apparently it happened during recess. They were all giggles and whispers." Colet nodded her head.
"It's so cute! Our little Gwyn Alistair is growing up!" Mikha added in. "Don't worry, Sheena. It's just innocent childhood stuff."
"Yeah, you're right. I'm sure it's nothing to worry about." I returned my attention to my laptop, but my mind is elsewhere. I can't shake off the feeling of unease. Noong bata ako, wala akong paki-alam sa mga ganto. Now that I am a parent, I am starting to think kung ganito rin naramdaman ng parents ko.
"Come on, Shee! Don't be such a worrywart. It's not like he's getting married!" Maloi smirked, emphasizing her statement as if it's a matter of fact.
"Yeah, you're right. I guess I just need to relax and trust that Gwyn knows right from wrong. But I'll ask him later." I replied. Sakto naman ang dating nila Jhoanna kaya hindi na namin napag-usapan ulit.
We are all in the living room while the kids were playing outside. Nagulat ako nang biglang pumasok si Gwyn and approached me.
"Mommy, I-i kissed a girl in school." he shyly said while unpacking his things on his backpack. Jhoanna, Aiah, and Stacey widened their eyes as they heard my son while Colet, Mikha, and Maloi gave me thumbs up.
"Wow! You are just like your mom!" Jhoanna commented.
"Anak, why did you kiss a girl?" I asked curiously.
"I saw Ninang Maloi kissed Ninang Stacey because when she saw her wearing a pink dress. You should kiss a girl when you think she's pretty, right?" he reasoned out.
Colet shook her head. "Shee, anak mo nga ito. Walang duda!" she said.
"Teka, Maloi, hinalikan mo asawa mo sa harap ng anak ko? And you, Gwyn, you don't kiss a girl just because she's wearing a pink dress! How old are you again?" nakapameywang akong humarap sa anak ko. For pete's sake! Grade 2 palang siya tapos may first kiss na?
Sana all.
"I'm 7, mommy." he smiled sheepishly. Pinakita niya pa sa kamay niya, raising his 5 fingers.
"Raised two more fingers, Gwyn. Make it more convincing." I heard Jhoanna whispered.
"Anak, I told you to respect girls, right? Mommy Gwen up there won't be happy if she finds out you kissed a girl. You can only kiss a girl if she's your girlfriend. Paglaki mo, maiintindihan mo rin lahat." I lectured in a calm manner and kissed his forehead. He hasn't met Gwen yet pero palagi akong nagkukwento sa kanya at pinapakita ang mga pictures namin ni Gwen.
Gwyn looked up and whispered, "I'm sorry, Mommy Gwen." I smiled instantly at nabura agad ang bigat ng pakiramdam ko.
Are you seeing this, my love? Our boy is learning something from me.
"Alright, tama na 'yan! Tara na kay Gweneth at baka hinihintay na tayo." Aiah said at nauna nang maglakad papunta sa kotse nila. We're visiting Gwen.
The sun beats down, casting long shadows. I parked my car alongside with my best friends. Gwyn holds an ice cream cone in one hand, the melting vanilla dripping down his fingers.
"Slow down, son. We don't want to get lost." I gently said.
Gwyn stops, licking his ice cream cone thoughtfully. "Where are we going, Mom?"
I smiled sadly.
"We're going to see someone special. Someone I used to know very well." we continue walking, finally stopping at a tombstone adorned with a photo of a young woman, Gwen, with a radiant smile.
I kneeled down, placing a bouquet of lilies beside the flowers. Her parents probably visited her today. Gwyn stands beside me, hesitant. While my best friends were behind us.
I heaved a sigh. "Anak, this is Mommy Gwen. A very special person who meant a lot to me."
Gwyn looks at the photo, then back at me. "H-hi, Mommy Gwen! I am Gwyn Alistair. 7 years old, healthy and charismatic." I heard my best friends laughed at it while I wiped a stray tear from my cheek. Gwyn looks up at me with concern. "Mama, are you okay?
I pulled him into a hug. "I miss her very much, anak. But I'm glad I got to share her with you, even if it's just in stories." I looked back at the photo, a determined glint in my eyes. "
Gwen, I promise to keep living life to the fullest, for both of us. And I'll make sure Gwyn knows how much you loved us, even from afar.
A gentle breeze rustles through the leaves, carrying my words across the cemetery.
Gwen's absence will always be a part of me, a bittersweet ache that reminds me of the love we shared. But life, I've learned, has a way of blooming even in the cracks. And with each sunrise, with each new experience, with the love of my friends and the laughter of my son, I find myself moving forward, carrying Gwen's memory in my heart as I embrace the vibrant tapestry of life.
But Gwen wouldn't have wanted the joy to stop there. She always had a soft spot for children, especially those facing challenges. So, in her honor, after a year, I started donating a portion of my clinic's profits to a charity that helps kids in hospitals.
Seeing the smiles on their faces, even through the pain, fills me with a warmth that spreads through me. It's a way to share the joy Gwen brought into my life, and a way to keep her spirit alive by helping others.
Life is good, yes. But it's even better when you can use it to make a difference, to light up a corner of the world, just like Gwen always did.