Sheena's POV
"Sheena, we need to talk."
A deep voice cuts through the haze of my thoughts.
"Sheena?" I freeze, the half-empty glass glued to my hand. Slowly, I turn my head towards the source of the voice. "There you are. Looking like a drowned kitten, mascara smudged, hair a mess."
My older brother is here. Perfect hair, perfect performance in the hospital, the golden child. Why did he have to show up now?
"K-kuya? Hey... what a surprise." I said, stuttering. My friends are just watching while my brother and I exchanged looks.
A sardonic smile started to play on his lips. "Surprise, huh? More like disappointment. You know what time it is? Do you have any idea what state you're in?"
I shook my head. No, you don't get to tell me things. This is my life. "I... I can handle myself."
"Really? Because from where I'm standing, you look like you can barely stand." His voice is laced with concern, but the underlying anger is clear. My cheeks burn with shame.
"And what about school, Sheena? Remember those finals you keep mentioning? The ones you're apparently failing?" he continued.
"I... I was just taking a break." I looked away, not wanting to stare him more. He looked like mom, but more scary.
"A break that involves tequila shots at a bar? You think this is some kind of game?"Â Tears prick my eyes. He's right, of course. But the pressure and my break up with Gweneth, the constant feeling of failing, it's suffocating.
"I don't know what you want me to say, kuya!" I shouted. I am starting to be frustrated again.
"I want you to get your act together, Sheena! This isn't who you are." Maybe he's right. Maybe this isn't me. But right now, it feels like the only way to escape the mess I've made.
"Look, I can take care of it." I reasoned out.
"No, you can't. You're coming home with me. Now." He grabs my arm, his grip surprisingly firm. Shame and a flicker of anger war within me.
"I'm not a child, kuya! Bakit ba lahat nalang may kailangan kang sabihin tungkol sa buhay ko? Oo na, you're way better than me. Masaya ka na? Ganyan naman kayong lahat. Ipaparamdam sa akin na mahal niyo ako tapos isusumbat niyo sa akin ang mga mali ko. Sinubukan mo bang tanungin kung kamusta ako o ano pinagdadaanan ko!? Hindi diba? Busy ka kasi para kamustahin ako." I shook my head. I felt Maloi attended to me while slightly patting my back.
I broke down again.
"You're not a child? Nag-eeksena ka rito. Apparently, you're acting like one. Let's go. YOU ARE COMING HOME WITH ME." Kuya said and pushed Maloi. He dragged me towards the exit pero nagpupumiglas ako.
"Let her go." Colet yelled to my kuya with a fire in her eyes.
"You don't get to tell me that, Colet. Kaibigan ka lang, kapatid niya ako." kuya answered.
"We may be JUST her friends in your eyes but we were there during her ups and downs. Kapatid namin 'yan, hindi lang basta kaibigan. Drag her again at kami ang makakalaban mo." Maloi told him.
"It's okay, guys. Maybe I should face the consequences after all. Mas gusto ni Gwen na ganito kesa naman maging rebellious ako ng tuluyan." I said and face my friends.
I saw my friends' faces softened when they turned their gaze at me.
"Why don't you tell her?" Mikha suddenly turned to kuya with a challenging look.
"Tell her what?" he asked.
"Kung sino palagi mong kasama sa hospital? Kung sino 'yong pumupunta sa'yo. Nakikita namin siya parati after she left Sheena." Colet said.
"Guys? What are you talking about?" I said.
Maloi got her phone and showed me a picture of my older brother with Gweneth, they're sitting at the bench outside the hospital with foods on their hands.
Gwen, my ex, the girl who shattered my heart into a million pieces just months ago. What is she even doing visiting Mark? They weren't exactly close. Images flash in my mind â stolen kisses under the bleachers, whispered secrets late at night, the way her eyes would crinkle when she laughed. The laughter that now feels like a cruel echo from a lifetime ago.
A bitter laugh escapes my lips. Of course. My older brother, the perfect brother, the one who always got straight A's and never let anyone down. And Gwen, the popular, seemingly flawless girl who everyone adored. A match made in some twisted fairytale universe.
My mind spins a thousand scenarios. Did he tell her about me? Did they talk about the mess I've made of my life, failing classes and drowning my sorrows in tequila shots?
A lump forms in my throat. Is Gwen there to comfort him, a picture of perfect support while I'm the screw-up little sister? The self-loathing is a familiar ache, a weight that settles heavily on my chest.
What can I possibly say? I chuckled and shook my head. "Hey, thanks for not telling me my ex is visiting you while I'm drowning my sorrows at the bottom of a glass."
The truth feels too raw, too pathetic.
Maybe I'm overthinking. Maybe Gwen's visit is innocent. Maybe... but the doubt lingers, a bitter seed taking root in my already wounded heart.
The ache deepens, a mix of jealousy and a strange sense of longing. Longing for the life I thought I'd have with Gwen, longing for the feeling of being someone's support system, someone's first choice.
"Sheena ... it's not what you think." he reasoned out and held my hand but I pushed his hands away from me.
"Okay na, kuya. Alagaan mo 'yon ha? Pangarap ko 'yon magmula nang tumungtong akong high school eh. Mahal na mahal ko 'yon kuya. Please, be good to her." I sniffed. Oh God! I am crying again. Kailan ba titigil ang mga luhang 'to para sa kanya?
"Will you listen to me, baby sis?" my brother gently asked.
I laughed sarcastically. "Now I'm your baby sis? Kanina ang tapang mo lang sumigaw at pumuna rito." I told him. "Kaya ba ayaw mo si Gwen sa akin dahil gusto mo pala siya? You were waiting for a perfect timing lang no? Kahit sino talaga mas pipiliin ang kapatid ko kesa sa akin. Sa bagay, you're way better than me." I continued.
"That's why we need to talk. Paano tayo mag-uusap niyan kung hindi ka mahinahon?" he asked again.
"Ikaw pa may ganang manumbat ngayon e 'no? Magsama kayo. Hindi ko kayo kailangan sa buhay ko!" I shouted and rushed my way to get in my car.
My friends were calling my name but I didn't mind them.
I was about to start the engine when Kuya went in front of my car. Nakadipa ang dalawang kamay niya at alam niyang masasagasahan ko siya kapag inabante ko ang sasakyan ko.
"What the fuck are you doing? Tumabi ka diyan!" I yelled.
"Please listen to me, Shee ..."
"No! Get out of my way!" I shouted.
He took a deep breath. "It's about Gwen."
"Okay, get in the car." I answered and he immediately get in. I looked at the rare view mirror and saw my friends following using Mikha's car.
"Drive to the hospital." kuya instructed so I obliged.
Train of thoughts are going to my mind while I was driving. What the hell is happening?
Kuya rushed inside the hospital once I parked my car. My friends and I exchanged confused looks and followed him. When we're in front of a room, he told us to wait for him so we did.
Minutes later, he signaled us to come inside the room.
There, sprawled on the hospital bed, textbooks fanned out across her lap, was Gwen. But she wasn't glowing with health, her cheeks flushed an unnatural pink, a sheen of sweat on her forehead. My heart hammered a confused rhythm against my ribs. Gwen, sick? The picture-perfect Gwen, laid low by something invisible?
My brother, his back to me, was explaining something to the doctor, his brow furrowed in concern. I shuffled closer, the sterile scent of the hospital clinging to the air.
"Apparently, she doesn't want you to worry," he said, his voice low. "So, she snuck out to see me instead. Look Sheena, we're not together in a romantic way. I am her assigned nurse."
A soft snort escaped my lips. Sneaking out to see my brother? The irony wasn't lost on me.
Gwen stirred, her eyelids fluttering open. She looked up, her eyes widening in surprise when they landed on me. Shame flooded her face, a stark contrast to her flushed cheeks.
"Bebe," she croaked, her voice a mere whisper.
For a moment, we just stared at each other, a silent conversation passing between us. There were apologies hanging in the air, unspoken regrets, a tangle of emotions I couldn't quite decipher.
Finally, I forced a smile, albeit a weak one. "Love, I'm here. I'm here now."
Seeing her like this, the carefree facade stripped away, only intensified the emotions I'd tried to bury. The memory of her touch, the way her eyes used to crinkle when she laughed - they flooded back with a painful sweetness.
The jealousy that had flared earlier was a mere flicker compared to the inferno now raging within me. It wasn't just a desire to comfort her, it was a desperate longing to be the one holding her hand, whispering reassurances, easing her pain.
Maybe, just maybe, this unexpected turn of events could be the catalyst we both needed. The chance to not only heal her physical wounds, but to mend the emotional ones that had driven us apart.
I caressed her hair while looking at her gently. I sniffed in unison with my friends' sniffing. I am hurting real bad. Not because of the break up months ago but because seeing her like this. I don't know what to do.
"Love, I'll take care of you. I promise." I said.
She smiled and nodded. "I know you will." she whispered weakly.