Ivan Petrov
I'm sitting on the couch in Sebastian's room. I'm more lying down than sitting, to be frank. And there are half a dozen pillows around me.
My hand is plastered and my back and leg need to be constantly iced. Richard asked me to check if I have blurry vision or hearing and tell him immediately. Concussion symptoms don't just end in one night.
Prince is on me, walking on my torso and licking my fractured hand. He then finds a spot in the middle of my chest, licks that as well, purrs and lies down on it.
"I've missed you so much, Little Boy," I say, stroking his back with my uninjured hand.
Prince purrs in response and adjusts his position. He's now sleeping on his side with his head tucked beneath my chin. I smile at his response. Sebastian and Jessica, who've been watching me interact with Prince quietly, let out a chuckle.
"I've never seen Prince do that before," Jessica says, walking over and gently patting the cat on the head. "I've never even seen him so still, if I'm being honest."
"Yeah, Prince has a soft spot for Ivan," Sebastian says, standing beside Jessica smiling at her like he always does. To him, she's the sun. What more reason does one need to be happy?
Jessica smiles back at him, and all of a sudden they're having a moment they shouldn't be having in front of me.
"Should I leave?" I ask them once they've stopped smiling at each other like two sunflowers on a summer day. They're not cringy like the other couples. They're so bearable, which is why I don't want to stay anymore. "I hate to say it, but I feel like the world's pettiest third wheel."
"Fourth wheel, you mean," Jessica corrects me. "Prince is the original third wheel."
Sebastian agrees. "He was annoying in a sweet way. You couldn't be mad at him, just a little annoyed and then he'd go and lick your face again the way the dogs do. The most adorable third wheel on the planet."
"What did he do?" I ask, looking at the sleeping prince curiously.
"A lot," Jessica says. "Once, Bas and I were making out and he ran in between our legs and started meowing like he'd just broken a limb. So we break apart and rush over to him, and guess what we found?"
"A broken limb?" I ask, knowing well in advance that wasn't the case. "Or a sprained one at least? Prince must have a good reason for doing what he did."
"Nothing," Jessica says. "Absolutely nothing. Just a furry pile of drama. They should cast him in Grey's Anatomy."
I laugh. "Holy shit. Now I know why Prince is my favorite out here. My bloody favorite. I can't believe you actually did that, young lad," I tell Prince, but he's happily snoring on my beating chest.
Jessica pouts at me, I simply shrug, letting myself laugh some more.
"And that was my first kiss," Sebastian says.
I look at him in absolute shock. "That? Prince ruined your first kiss?"
Sebastian blushes. "Yeah."
I look back at Prince. I'm not proud of him like before, I'm mad at him. He just ruined the world's sweetest guy's first kiss.
"Now that makes you a real bad boy," I scold. "Not a compliment, mind you. Everyone out here loves them, but not me. I have a real aversion to those narcissists."
"Lex is a bad boy," Sebastian comments.
"No," Jessica argues. "He's a good guy trying to act cool and pretend to be some egoistic bitch. It rarely works for people, but he happens to be an exception."
"Lex is not good, Jess. Have you ever seen him?"
"He's better than most people think. But he hates it. He hates being that guy everyone can rely upon. He hates being the best child. So he goes and creates a new reputation."
Jessica knows more about people than I thought. She's not wrong about Hope. She's not wrong at all. He's really easy to see through. He's kind and caring and almost never an asshole. Almost.
Sebastian falls quiet. "I still don't like him."
Jessica nods. She knows what's going on between the brothers. But it's something between them, so I don't ask about it.
"Ivan," Sebastian says, out of the blue. "How's the pain? Dad told me to keep a check on you."
"Not much," I say.
"On a scale of one to ten?"
I pause. "Four."
"Liar," Sebastian says and touches my ribs. "Dad said it'll hurt a lot during this time."
"I can bear it, Sebastian. Don't worry," I defend myself. The last thing I want is another dose of those painkillers.
"But you're supposed to be--"
"Please, Sebastian. It's not that bad. I swear, if I need it I'll tell, I swear."
Sebastian sighs reluctantly. "Don't tell Lex I'm not giving you the dose, please. He'll kill me."
I smile. "Yeah, okay."
"At least let me change your ice," he offers. I nod and he picks up the ice pack from my legs and back and hurries downstairs. I'm stuck alone with Jessica.
"Lex is being protective, huh?" she says, her lips crack into a smile. "I knew it. I told you he's a good guy."
"It's really hard to believe," I tell her. "I lived my entire life thinking he was the biggest douchebag on the planet."
"But he isn't, right? Proves you wrong the more you get to know him."
"Damn right."
She smiles. "I don't know if Bas told you I'm pansexual."
I press my back against the couch. "Lex did, actually. And he wanted me to talk to you."
She nods. "I don't think we'll get to have this conversation again, but I'm proud of you. I saw the video - that's a terrible thing to do. Coming out itself is full of surprises, I can only imagine what you must be going through."
I laugh a bit, sarcasm in every chuckle. "This has almost nothing to do with pride. I've got a ruined career in front of me. A ruined life. No college, no leagues. I'll be stuck with myself."
"Ivan, if you want the world to accept you, you've gotta accept yourself first. Being proud of yourself is not a crime. So many people love you."
"No," I deadpan. "The Wildcats did this to me. And we're on the same team. My father kicked me out of the house. My ma is dead. So much bloody love in the air."
"Are they the only people in your life?"
I avoid eye contact. "Of course not. There are so many others, but they're... they don't love me."
She raises her brow as if to say 'Think again.'
I exhale through my mouth. "The Hopes, you mean? I'm not their son."
"You don't have to answer me. Love yourself, Ivan. You'll feel better, I swear."
I think about her words and then talk about something else. Talk about her. "How was it when you came out?"
"Oh." She rolls her eyes. "Some of the cheerleaders thought I was in the team because of them. I liked them or something. It was really weird, it still is. And the others think I'm doing all of this for attention because I'm dating Bas."
"Why is the world so stupid?" I voice my thoughts. "Why can't we just be ourselves without consequences?"
"We can, we just won't. It takes a lot of courage to be yourself in front of everybody."
I stroke Prince's breathing back. He looks so peaceful, so carefree. "Sometimes I wish I was a cat."
I don't expect her to understand but she does, strangely. She's so easy to trust. "Sometimes I wish I lived in Iceland."
I laugh and she laughs with me. I smile at her gratefully. Thanks for the conversation.
She shrugs it off. I did nothing.
Sebastian enters the room just then, holding a couple of ice packs on each of his hands. "I'm sorry I got delayed. I had to run some errands."
He walks over and tucks the ice where they're supposed to me. "Is that fine?"
"The one on my back," I say. "A little to the right, please."
He does as I say and when I'm comfortable, he stands back. "I swear, I hate the Vinions so much."
"Even more than when they attacked you?" Jessica asks.
"Way more, I'd kill them if I could."
"That doesn't make you any different from them, does it?" Jessica thoughtfully asks.
"I'm sorry," I intrude. "But who are they? The Vinions?"
Sebastian and Jessica look at me like I'm an old-fashioned moose. "Vinny Donovan," Sebastian explains. "And his brainless followers. His minions. The Vinions."
"Ahh," I say. "That makes a lot of sense."
"Doesn't it?" Jessica pipes in. "A shame the three of us are the only ones who know about the nickname."
Sebastian shakes his head while his brother bursts into the room. Storms into the room, whatever's more appropriate.
"I've been looking for you everywhere," Hope growls, looking at Sebastian. Then he brings out a bottle of pills out of his pocket and raises it to the air. "You didn't give Ivan his meds, what's wrong with you?"
Sebastian glares back at his brother. "I-- They're painkillers, Lex. And what makes you think I didn't give them to him?"
"The pills haven't reduced," Hope explains.
"You counted them?" Sebastian asks, voicing out my surprise.
"I weighed the bottle, genius. And it hasn't decreased. What am I supposed to think? I trusted you, how could you be so irresponsible?"
"Hope," I break in. "I was the one who told Sebastian not to give me those 'killers. It's my fault."
Hope's expression changes from enraged to concerned when he looks at me. "But he's supposed to give them to you anyway."
"I can bear the pain, how many times do I have to tell you all that. Sebastian understands, stop blaming him for helping me." I have to defend Sebastian, he wouldn't be in this position had I not convinced him to avoid the painkillers. And Hope's behaving strangely today.
"But-"
"Please, Hope. I swear, if I ever feel like I need them, I'll let you know."
Hope looks at me disbelievingly. "Sure you will," he mutters. Then he comes closer and adjusts my pillows, keeping the ice packs aside and slips one hand below my back and the other below my knees.
I feel his hands against my clothes as he lifts me up. "What are you doing?"
"It's bedtime," he says. "I'm taking you upstairs. And Prince as well, he won't leave you alone, will he?"
Prince is snug on my chest, cuddled into a ball as he draws heat from me.
Sebastian dumps the ice packs on my torso, careful enough to not disturb Prince, and bids us (me) goodnight. Meanwhile, Jessica is jabbing Sebastian's side like they have some running joke between them.
I ignore them as Hope takes me outside the room. I shift against his chest. "I can walk goddammit," I mutter angrily.
"I don't want you to."
This is downright flirting. This should be a crime. Why isn't he in jail?
I sigh. "And it's barely nine! Why am I sleeping so early?"
He gives me a look. "Mom says sleeping will heal your bones faster."
I roll my eyes. "Is she a doctor as well or something?"
He smiles as he walks up the stairs. "As a matter of fact, yes. Dr Emelia Collymore-Hope, that's her name."
I smack my forehead with my right hand. "Why didn't you tell me all of this before? I can't believe it. So your parents work together?"
He chuckles, eyes getting greener by the second. "She's not that kind of doctor. She has a PhD in Anthropology. But she's a mother so she knows everything about these injuries."
He then takes my right hand, which is still on my forehead since I smacked it, and puts it on my side. "Don't do that," he says. "I don't want you moving much."
"Then I'll grow fat," I mumble.
He looks at me sincerely. "Are you kidding me? You're lighter than a feather. I don't know how you're able to carry Prince's weight on you."
"Hey!"
He chuckles again. "Okay, okay. I'll let you exercise a bit. But this week, you need to rest. Or you'll never recover. Besides, mother says eating more food helps the bones heal faster."
I shake my head. "Are you gonna make me do the things you want by just telling me it'll help my bones recover?"
"That was the plan. A pity you saw through it."
We reach his room and he carefully places me on the bed. His bed. He then gathers two other pillows and places them below my back, adjusting it until I'm comfortable. Prince is still bundled up on my chest.
When I see Hope taking his pajamas out of the cupboard, I ask, "What are you doing?"
Hope looks at me, pajamas in hands. "To shower and change. I'm not leaving you alone like this."
Like what? "I'm not alone, I have Prince with me."
He sighs. "Can't I do anything without admitting I like your company? I want to lie down with you, okay? Can't I do that?"
Everything's on fire. Except Hope. He seems to be giving off his own heat. The kind a cold shower can't put off.
It takes him five minutes. I wait for Hope, he returns from the shower wearing pink pajamas with black paw prints all over them. He also has hair that's dripping with water and a chest that is so bare, I can't help but think how it'll feel beneath my fingers.
Not that I care, of course.
Hope realizes I'm on his bed and walks towards his cupboard and fishes out an old shirt. He begins to slip it on but he shrugs and dumps the shirt away. "Mom says sleeping shirtless helps the body grow."
He lies down on the bed beside me. There's only one blanket and I'm the one using it. I offer one end of the blanket to him. He takes it and slides in beside me.
"Honey, this blanket isn't big enough for the two of us," he says as we try to divide the duvet between us.
I stare at him. He did not just make a reference to one of my favorite songs. "You listen to My Chemical Romance?"
He smiles coyly. "I don't want to be clueless when my dad starts talking to you about the meaning of some song in some random album I haven't even heard of."
"How much of MCR have you heard?"
He shrugs. "Just that, actually. Apart from that weird instrumental song in the beginning. But they're music... I'm not sure I'm enjoying it as much as I'm supposed to."
"I'm glad you're at least trying them out."
He smiles. "But I'm really concerned. The amount of pills I'm taking counteracts the booze I'm drinking?" He quotes the opening lines of the song.
I laugh. "It's just a lyric goddammit!"
"I know," he says. "I'm just... you're okay, right?"
"I'll give you an MCR song as an answer."
"You can't do that! What's it called, anyways?"
"It's from their second album and it's quite popular. Big meme, too. Figure it out."
He sighs. "This guy," he whispers to himself but I hear it. Then he strokes Prince on the head. "I'm jealous, you know? Prince gets to cuddle up with you whenever he wants."
I glance at him. "Don't flirt with me."
"I'm not flirting with you, I'm flirting with Prince. He never cuddles up with me."
"He's asleep," I point out.
"Oh right, so he can't cuddle with me right now. I guess I'll have to look for a replacement."
He stretches his arm and brings himself closer to me. I can smell his citrus soap as he presses chest against my side. We're in an awkward position but it's weirdly comfortable.
"This is not cuddling," I tell him.
He smiles as he presses himself closer to me, eyelids shut. "Another day, then."
Another day.