The night was rough. He tossed and turned, the sheets twisting around his body like a cocoon, smothering him in sweat and anxiety. He tried not to think about the day, only for his mind to linger on it. If Alex had gotten any sleep, he couldn't remember it.
Eli didn't look any better than him that morning, but when Alex asked her if she slept alright, she nodded like a liar. He didn't have it in him to call her out on it. He might have made a joke about her eye bags any other day, but it wasn't like his were any better.
They went to HQ like nothing was wrong. Like Klaus was still with them. Like they had nothing to hide at all. Alex nodded when people said good morning and smiled when it was appropriate. He got started on his paperwork and sipped cheap, water-downed coffee as he looked through what he needed to fill out about his recruits.
The only other recruiter came over when he saw Alex, offering an even more watered-down coffee. Alex took it anyway. He drained the cup in a few gulps.
The recruiter didn't speak until the paper cup was empty. He even took it from Alex, throwing it away for him along with the other one. "Did you see the news?" he asked with uncharacteristic brightness.
That gave Alex some pause. "What news?"
He leaned in like it was a secret. "The Republic's smallest R&D building was destroyed," the boy said. "I heard that nothing's left. They lost everything physical and then some."
Alex hummed. No wonder everyone was so chipper. He thought he was just being a crank. This might boost the Elite's morale for a bit. God knew they all needed it. "How'd that happen?"
"Some people after hours, apparently."
"Do we know who?"
"Don't think so," he said. "And frankly, I don't care. They did us a favor burning it down and that's all I care about. I heard this is going to set them back a bit. Wouldn't it be great if whoever was responsible burned it all down? Maybe they'll consider going after a facility next."
Alex paused. Burned down the same night Klaus left.
"Boss wants you, by the way."
Immediate dread. His recruitment numbers were shit recently. So shit that the director himself had found it necessary to personally chew him out.
Alex walked to the office like a lamb to slaughter, bracing himself for the worst as he stepped into the room.
"Ah," he said in a deep voice. "Please take a seat."
Alex was not prone to fidgeting but understood the appeal in moments like this. He knew he should have been focused on what Knox was going to say, but instead, his mind kept wandering off to Klaus and what might have happened to him. Had this all been part of some plan? Was it by chance that Klaus left practically at the same time as the R&D building went up in flames? It could have been someone else - it probably was someone else. There were plenty of other Elites who were angry enough to do something like that, but-
"Alexander."
Alex snapped back to reality.
Knox slid a file across his desk. "Take a look."
Alex flipped it open. Some of the material was familiar. It was what they knew of a facility that they'd been trying to infiltrate for some time, only to fail over and over. If it was up to Alex, he would've called it quits and focused on something else instead of sending someone else in to die.
Maybe Knox was so done with Alex's recruitment numbers that he was sending him there. Turn him into an example. There were rumors that he screwed over Elites he didn't like, but those were baseless. The man didn't let it show when he disliked anyone.
A quick skim of the file disproved that, but Alex frowned anyway. Knox wanted to send in the kid who had a brother. Zayd Faraj. One of Alex's few, more recent recruits. He was new - practically an infant and everything about this mission screamed cursed.
"The last three agents were found out, sir. You want to send in someone new?"
Director Knox kept his face blank, but his eyes betrayed his exhaustion. "We need to establish a source in that facility. If the kid plays his cards right, he should be okay."
Alex wasn't one to question orders, at least not out loud, but he couldn't stop himself. "Do you think he will be?"
"I think that of the few recruits you've found, he has the best chance. He's not an Enhanced. If the Republic tests him, he won't need to worry about it. We've never had a non-Enhanced in the Elites. They won't assume he's one of us right off the bat."
"He's too new to-"
Knox clicked his tongue. "You're getting soft when we can't afford to be. Is that why you've hardly been bringing in recruits?"
Alex couldn't shake the feeling of dread he felt when he knew he'd disappointed Knox. A single look from the man had the power to make him feel ashamed. "I'm sorry." Every time Knox said something critical, Alex's head would droop and he'd apologize, feeling like he was a failure.
"Up your numbers."
"Yes, sir."
"Go," he sighed, like a disappointed elder. "Give that new agent his orders. Offer him what advice you can, but don't scare him. If he looks like he might run, remind him that we're protecting his brother."
It wasn't supposed to be a threat, but it certainly sounded like one. He ignored it, like the child who used to hide in his closet with his hands clamped over his ear. If he thought too hard about any of this, he'd start to feel like he was sending
Alex nodded and took his leave. Zayd was not in the building, nor was he where he was currently living. He wasn't answering his phone - sending the call straight to voicemail instead. The safe house - he had to be there.
When Alex caught up to him, he was indeed outside the safehouse, crouched in the grass as he spoke to his brother. He was smiling, but the kid stood there with a wobbling lip and shiny eyes. Alex waited some distance away, watching quietly and wondering if Zayd would've joined if his brother wasn't like them. Would he have taken such a big risk? Would Zayd stay loyal if they failed to protect the child?
Would Alex have joined if he wasn't Enhanced? Would he have felt the same need to stop the Republic? If his little sister was alive and like him, he would have, without a doubt. But if she wasn't? If he had nothing to gain?
Alex should have envied that his sibling was alive and well, that he had a family to fight for, but maybe it was better that his own didn't have to see him turn into a puppet. He watched Zayd pull the kid in for a hug and laugh, ruffling his hair when the kid squeezed his way out of the embrace, suddenly more annoyed than sad.
Alex remembered ruffling Lola's hair, but he couldn't remember what it felt like. It left a bitter taste in his mouth. Her absence seeped a little deeper into his bones. So, maybe he was a little envious.
The kid turned on his heels and stomped inside, trying to fix his hair as he went.
Alex cleared his throat. Zayd only turned to look at Alex once the boy was inside the cabin. "I was saying goodbye," he said. "I heard a mission was coming. I wasn't going to run off."
"I didn't think you were."
The smile that was met gave Alex a terrible sense of deja vu. "Maybe not," he said, voice heavy with doubt he didn't bother to hide. "Are you going to tell me what I'm supposed to do now?"
Alex fed him his mission with a tongue that felt like lead. He did it the way he always did when he thought it would go, as matter-of-fact as possible and with whatever advice he could think of. He didn't look at the man standing before him, trying to appear outwardly composed even as his insides were stone.
If Zayd heard anything off, he didn't let on. If he was nervous, he didn't mention it. He just looked back at the safehouse once more. The man simply nodded, accepting the mission.
"If something happens to me," he said, his voice uncertain, "he still gets to stay there, right?"
"I'll make sure he's safe," Alex said, in lieu of making a promise he might not be able to keep. "He'll be okay if something happens, but don't think about that. Focus on coming back to him."
"I'll be going then," he said, satisfied with what little he was offered.
"Good luck."
Alex watched Zayd's figure disappear in the distance, a familiar sorrow tightening in his chest. Maybe he'd survive to see his brother again.