Chapter 82: Chapter 82: Dick Splits Stone?

When you’ve got more mojo than the average guy, what’s the first money-making scheme that pops into your head? For most, it’d be snagging a sugar mama, becoming a gigolo, or starring in adult films.

But Ethan wanted to carve out a different path.

“Family! Now watch me perform some real karate! Hit like, follow! Give your host some power!”

Ethan stood with his arms crossed, dressed in a karate gi from the waist up, exuding a master’s aura, but his lower half sported nothing but his bare, pale legs.

Blair was decked out in a leather outfit and mask, wrapped up tight.

She picked up two karate boards and tapped them thrice in front of the camera, producing a crisp “thud, thud.”

Then, she stacked them on the ground in three layers.

The screen was flooded with comments.n/o/vel/b//in dot c//om

“No way, this is too crazy!”

“He’s not really going to smash those boards with his dick, is he?”

Ethan took a deep breath, his body surged downward, and with accelerating force, his dick smashed down on the boards, snapping them in half with a crisp crack.

Wood splinters flew everywhere.

The comments exploded on the screen.

“Holy shit! I saw the splinters, it’s the real deal!”

“Coach! I want to learn this!”

“This is the karate I want to learn!”

Dozens of virtual diamond treasure chests floated across the screen.

Ethan took a deep breath and gave a thumbs up to the camera: “Well-endowed coach’s karate showcase ends here today, did you all get it?”

The comments started flooding in.

“Just tried it, I’m wrecked!”

“I just want to know where to sign up!”

Seeing the good vibes, Ethan pointed at the screen: “What are you waiting for! Like, follow, share, ‘well-endowed’ coach teaches you life hacks every day!”

The live stream ended.

Ethan took off his headgear, his hair dotted with sweat, and he sighed deeply, fanning himself with the headgear: “I’m dying of heat, that was tough.”

“No worries.” Blair casually took off her leather jacket, revealing a plain black bra underneath.

Her chest wasn’t very large, a C cup, with a glimpse of pale cleavage visible.

Being a key player on the basketball team, her low body fat percentage faintly outlined her abs.

After she peeled off her leather pants, her six-foot frame boasted a pair of unbeatable long, white, straight legs.

“If it’s too hot, you don’t have to wear the leather,” Ethan suggested, knowing that while Blair looked striking in leather, it wasn’t exactly comfortable.

“This outfit makes it hard for people to recognize me.” Blair stayed in her underwear, not rushing to change back into regular clothes.

She planned to take a shower and change later.

“Alright, safety first. How much did we make today?” Ethan didn’t press her,he was currently the world’s number one in male performance.

But his overall stats were only a 4, equivalent to the physical stamina of a fourteen-year-old girl supporting his body.

The performance of swinging his “pecker” to split the boards had been exhausting.

Blair picked up her phone to check their earnings.

She had arranged all the equipment.

Ethan’s current status was still that of a hospital patient.

He also worried about being tracked down through any leads, which would be hard to explain.

After all, how do you explain a supposedly paralyzed patient energetically swinging his dick around? It’s utterly fantastical.

After commissions, it boils down to $60,” Blair said as she put down her phone. “Next month when we cash out, we’ll have to factor in taxes too.”

“Only $60?” Ethan squinted his eyes.

Money was harder to earn than he had imagined.

Even though earning $60 an hour was relatively high, just the rent was $360, plus all the miscellaneous expenses, there wasn’t much left at the end of the month.

And he knew this novelty would wear off.

This kind of stunt had its limits.

He wanted to make money faster, to ease his aunt’s financial burden.

“Main income for regular streamers comes from ads,” Blair said, sitting on the floor in her underwear, legs crossed. “We don’t take ads and don’t interact with other streamers, so our fan growth is too slow.”

“Yeah, I know.” Ethan sat down beside her, resting his head on her long legs, which weren’t very fleshy but still comfortable to lie on. “We could only really take ads for men’s health, which would be a hassle.”

He was just looking to make some quick cash. Taking on ads would mean signing a bunch of messy agreements.

“Those female streamers who want to interact with me are just drooling over my body, hoping to be the first to ‘experience’ the giant pecker and use me to hype themselves up,” Ethan was well aware of this.

The vixens on Xvids’ adult streaming channels just wanted to perform baby-making acts with him, purely out of a curiosity.

It wasn’t that he had any scruples,even if it was his first time on screen, he wanted to make it count financially.

“Our fan loyalty is high,” Blair said, shifting her legs to a new position, allowing him to use them as a pillow. “And the rate at which we’re gaining followers is already fast. It’s only been a week and we’ve already surpassed 200,000 followers.”

“No, it’s too slow,” Ethan shook his head. “I’m different from those content-based streamers. The followers I’m getting are just here for the novelty, and I don’t plan to stick around long-term.”

He was clear about his own positioning.

“What should we do then?” Ethan turned, resting his face on Blair’s thigh instead of the back of his head. “We need to find a way to quickly increase our visibility.”

Both were lost in their thoughts.

Blair suddenly looked up. “To quickly increase visibility, we need more people to see us, like maybe getting interviewed by a well-known streamer? I’ve received some connection requests from other streamers in the backend.”

“More visibility, huh?” Ethan narrowed his eyes, then suddenly opened them wide. “How many people would a streamer bring? What about going on a TV show?”

“On a TV show?” Blair looked puzzled.

“Yes.” Ethan pulled out his phone and quickly typed: “Dream Chaser Show.”

He quickly found the information he needed.

The Dream Chaser Show was a variety show hosted by CC TV. The rules were simple, with no limits on the form of performance and judges scoring the acts. It had recently added an online voting segment.

It was a national favorite.

And the champion’s prize was $100,000.

He figured his act of using his dick to split boards wouldn’t win the championship, but just appearing on the show would be enough to boost his visibility and make quick money.

“Alright, that’s settled then!”

He quickly browsed through the program.

Among the guests for this episode, he saw a familiar name.

The popular artist known as the Chameleon Goddess, Abigaile Johnson.

When he first arrived at the hospital, it was because of Abigaile Johnson’s photo album that his aunt thought his dying wish was for her to become a teacher.

“Back then I watched your cosplay as a teacher, now it’s your turn to watch me perform ‘Dick Splits Stone.’ Guess that evens things out, huh?”

A few days later.

On the desk of the Dream Chaser Show’s director, a document appeared.

“Performance: Dick Splits Stone?”