Chapter 50: Chapter 50

Raven

Raven stood still, her gaze fixed on Lyka’s belly. Her head felt light, and a heavy weight seemed to press down on her chest. She had hoped they would find happiness and move on, but a small, selfish part of her wished they wouldn’t.

Tears welled up in her eyes, and a nauseating wave of realization washed over her as she started to piece things together. Something didn’t add up. She was jumping to conclusions.

Arenk wouldn’t hide something like this from her. He and Lyka had been close for years. He was just being a good friend to her.

“Is it a girl or a boy?” Raven asked.

“I—I want it to be a surprise,” Lyka replied.

“May I?” Raven asked, extending her hand.

Lyka nodded.

As Raven gently rubbed Lyka’s belly, a tiny kick responded. She herself would’ve been showing by now.

“I’m glad you’re so understanding about this,” Lyka said, smiling. “Thank you.”

Raven’s body shook. “You two are close. It makes sense. I just thought fathers were more involved here, but it’s good that you have a support system.”

Lyka’s face crinkled in confusion, and she laughed. “Well, Arenk is proof that they are.” She glanced from Raven to Arenk and back again.

Raven’s body trembled, and realization dawned on Lyka’s face.

“Seven cycles, and you were so quick to discard me, but her. You couldn’t tell her about the promise we made so long ago,” Lyka whispered.

“Wait for me by the elevator. Give us a moment,” Arenk said.

Raven felt like she couldn’t breathe. Lies. She had known about his hidden agenda, but she didn’t expect this from him.

Arenk, of all people, had seemed honorable, if you could look past his ulterior motives.

Laro was all about status and fun.

Dhol, his first love, always put duty first.

Lyka shot a glare and walked off. Arenk pushed open the door Raven had just exited. She tried to steady her breathing and forced her feet to move.

The soft swoosh of the door seemed to echo, drowning out the pounding of her heart.

“Busy with work?” Raven remembered Dhol’s excuse for why Arenk and Laro hadn’t come for her.

She started to wonder what Laro was doing and if Dhol’s coldness the other night wasn’t an act after all.

“You weren’t supposed to find out like this,” Arenk said.

“Was I supposed to find out after the baby was grown?”

The burning, sickening feeling inside her boiled over.

“Everything happened so fast. I wanted to be sure I was the father before telling you, then—”

“Stop with the excuses. You lied,” Raven shouted.

“Lower your voice. How was I supposed to say I want to be with you, but I got another woman pregnant, and I promised to be mates with her, then top it off with a sorry?”

“Is a blade coated with honey sweeter going in?” Raven asked, gripping the edge of the counter with both hands.

“What?” he whispered, his brows furrowed.

“How you just told me. It hurt, but it was better than finding out this way.” She held back a low, desperate, sad scream. It was more than she wanted to share.

“It’s like I said months ago. I’m useful until I’m not. But why?”

“That’s not how it is.” His voice cracked.

“Why, Arenk? Answer me.”

“Why what?”

“Why did you pretend to care? Why did you trap me here? All of you, with your sweet words and touches—you’re nothing but wolves. It’s my fault for doubting what you all really are.”

Her breath came in ragged gasps, like she was drowning.

“I’ve never pretended with you. Every day I’m not with you, I feel more and more empty.”

Raven’s mind drifted back to that day in Midnight and General Fleu’s trick. The pain of watching her child spill out onto the floor. Her anger broke through.

“Stop the bullshit. Empty”—her voice trembled—“you don’t know the meaning of empty. At least you will see your child. I never will. My choices are always taken away by one of you,” she said, her teeth clenched.

His mouth fell open, and his eyes widened.

“Spending countless hours imagining what their little face would look like, then dreaming of a life with—” Tears streamed down her cheeks.

Arenk pulled her into a hug, and his familiar sweet scent filled her senses, making her heart flutter despite everything.

He took a shaky breath. “I’m sorry, Raven. I’m sorry you had to go through it alone. That I couldn’t protect you. I will do better.”

This time it was different. That same hug and those sweet words, meant to comfort her, burned her skin and ears worse than the brand. Raven pushed him away.

“I’m not angry that you want to be a father. Go and do that. I know you’ll be amazing,” she said, heading for the door.

“It was always the plan when I went to the king to ask about matehood with Lyka. I would ask—”

“To make me your personal whore?”

Arenk flinched.

“’Cause we both know Lyka won’t play second fiddle to anyone. Besides,” she said, lifting her hair, “haven’t you heard? I’m the king’s personal whore now. So forget about me. It shouldn’t be too hard. It seems you already have.”

“Raven, wait.” Arenk grabbed her wrist tightly.

She met his gaze, and Raven didn’t think her heart could break any more, but it did when she saw his tear-streaked face.

“I’ve always done my best by you, and I’m not giving up. I swear to the universe that I will never let you go.” His voice broke.

Raven yanked her wrist free from his grasp and stormed out of the room. She swiped at the hot tears streaming down her face with such force, she was afraid she might leave a bruise.

“Ah, there you are. We’ve got another room ready for you,” the man with the clear tablet said, barely glancing up from his screen.

He gestured towards a door and she hurried through it. Raven slammed the door behind her, pressing her forehead against the cool wood. A sob escaped her as she slid down to the floor.

“What’s with the tears?” a voice asked.

Raven shot up, banging her head on the door handle in the process. At the far end of the room, King Soi-Ji was casually leaning against the windowsill.