I feel Raph go still immediately and the I instinctively hold my breath, waiting for something to happen. I know that this was a deliberate move from the alpha, wanting to rile Raph up and it makes me want to hurt him. It makes me want to show him how much Raph is hurting already. I wonder whether the alpha doesn't understand that leaving this place, his family, is already close to unbearable for him. I wonder whether I'm the only one that has ever really and honestly tried to understand him.
I'm suddenly glad that I will be taking him away from this place, where he isn't even listened to, but then I remember that the alpha won't let Sam go. This alone makes me doubt, once again, whether Raph will come with me. I can't even blame him if he doesn't. Sam needs him and vice versa, I was the one that stepped into that bond in the first place. Without me, they would be okay now.
'Sam comes with me.' Raph says strongly.
When I look over, he stands before me and Sam, his back straight, shoulders wide and every single muscle in his body taught. He looks ready to fight, even though we all know that he won't stand a chance against all of them.
'He will stay. You will leave. That's what is going to happen and it would be in your interest to act accordingly.' is the alpha's only answer. His voice is strong, cold and doesn't leave any room for argument. When Raph doesn't move, the pack starts snarling once again. They are slowly closing in on us, even though they barely move and I recognise the threat. They won't let Raph have time to argue or even beg. They consider the discussion over because their alpha does too.
I want to tell Raph to make a decision now, but even I recognise that there is no decision anymore. The alpha has decided that Sam is to stay and we are to leave.
I move to touch Raph when I realise how close he is to talking again or, even worse, attacking, but I am too slow. Mum gets to him first and hugs him to her, like she used to with me when I couldn't cope with anything. The air seems to just still while Raph is in her arms and I feel my heart squeeze when his hands grip unto her jumper in desperation. I can see her whispering something in his ear before she lets go and turns to me.
She doesn't say anything to me, but she doesn't need to either. Her hands clasp my face and she just stares at me for a second, then she engulfs me in a big hug, kisses my cheek and she's gone.
It feels like a final goodbye and force myself to not think of it that way, at least not now. I can't break down now, not when we're this pressed for time.
The alpha and especially the pack are losing their patience, and quickly.
Mum kneels down in front of Sam, smiles at him, whispers with him for a second, even manages to laugh and get him to laugh a little, then lifts him up to rest on her hips and simply walks away towards the alpha.
The pack immediately move in the way, ready to forcefully stop her if needed, but the alpha makes them clear and lets her walk past. She doesn't even stop though. She simply walks past everyone, not caring if they hurt her while walking past. She is protecting Sam as best as she can as she makes her way into the pack house. Sam is unexpectedly quiet and I find my gaze locked on him as he simply stares to the floor. When the door close, I still don't move. I don't quite comprehend what is happening anymore and just keep staring at the door.
A gentle touch at my wrist is what makes me look over. Raph is there, a smile on his face, even if it's a completely fake on, and he grabs my hand and pulls me away. We walk away without anyone or anything following us except the packs snarls and malicious growls.
It's a funny feeling, wrong feeling to be walking away like this. There weren't any proper goodbyes, any sorted out feelings and like this every step feels like it's taken with too much weight on my shoulders.
Raph and I don't talk. He simply holds my hand and leads me away and I'm disgusted with myself for having him be the strong one when he just lost his family.
We walk for what feels like forever, but is probably only about 20 minutes. The pack land is quite big, which is why it will take a while for us to actually leave it.
I stop then.
'Where are we gonna go?' I ask and I can't mask the fear in my voice at all.
'We'll find somewhere. We're strong. We can claim a piece of land as our own, just a little dot somewhere close to a town. We'll manage. We'll be fine.' It's all bullshit and I know it, Raph knows it. Two wolves can't just simply claim land. We would be ripped to shreds in no time. We can't just join a pack either. It requires some sort of reason and we left on our own in some ways. We don't have a reason.
I take a deep breath while closing my eyes, holding back the tears I want to shed for him. I feel arms wrap around me as Raph pulls me to him to calm me down.
When tears drop onto my neck I realise that the hug might be more to Raph down himself. He's shaking and clinging to me and my heart sinks then. This is it. We're on our own now.
My one hand holds his head to my neck while my other one snakes to his lower back, holding him as tightly as I can in a desperate attempt to calm him down. It takes him a good few minutes to stop shaking from his silent tears and even then he still holds onto me like a man drowning.
I don't want to say anything and I wish we can stay like this, calming our minds enough to think on what to do. But that's when I hear the howling in the distance. I know this all too well and it sends shivers down my spine. The sun is just rising so the intention is clear.
These are howls exchanged on a hunt and the only wolves out at this time are patrols, wolves never hunt at this time. Unless of course they have a special reason.
Without stopping to think it through, I grab Raph and just run.
'They're coming for us.' I tell him as we run. He catches on quickly, nods to me with a determination that is solely built on adrenalin and desperation and shifts mid-stride. I follow along and soon we are on four paws each, running through the trees in hopes of making it over the border before they get to us.
We can her them in the distance, they don't try to be silent. Their aim is to scare as and to hunt us as they would on a hunt for fun. Letting your prey know they're being hunted makes it all the more exciting.
They keep howling, to communicate and soon I realise that we've made a mistake or rather, were played. Because right in front of us a howl gets returned, just in time for us to stop before running straight into them. And there they are, three of them, standing right there, ready to tear us apart had we not stopped in time.
They're growling at us, hissing and snarling and my heart sinks.
Behind us the rest soon gets here as well, another four. There are seven and we are two. I know we can both hold our own in a fight, but these odds are hard to beat. The only remotely positive thing is that this can't be an official ambush, otherwise the alpha would have sent more wolves. This is most likely a personal vendetta for what we did to their alpha-to-be.
I share a quick look with Raph and I know we agree on what to do. Even if it's suicidal and even if we don't stand a chance, we will not let ourselves be beaten down so easily. The border is barely a mile away, if we play it smart, there's a chance we'll make it.
Soon, the first wolves runs up to us, closely followed by the rest. I briefly pull my body back, duck and then shoot forward, far quicker than they were expecting as I swipe my paw into his face before evading another wolf's bite. I'm busy fighting with and defending against these two when I feel claws at my side and a heave body on my back. I desperately try getting him off my as my legs start crumbling over the pain the weight, before he can inflict too much damage. When the first wolf comes to attack me again, I let my body drop, effectively making him swipe his comrade in the face. He falls off with a howl and I don't waste any time lock my jaws on the other's throat. He's not dead but fighting would end his life immediately, so I leave him and turn around just in time to evade a fatal blow to my own throat by a female wolf. Both her and the other wolf from earlier circle me, ready to attack at any time. They're both still more or less unharmed, whereas I'm bleeding from both sides and had some minor cuts and bruises all over my body. It's when the first one attacked me and I don't pay attention to the other one that my heart stops.
I'm defending the female wolf's attack when I see the other one out of the corner of my eyes but it's too late. There is no way for me to defend or evade both of them.
Suddenly, Raph jumps onto the attacking wolf, making them both roll around in a heap of limps and snarls as I am busy fighting with the female. In a moment of weakness I manage to swipe at her eyes with my claws, rendering her useless, but when I turn around to Raph, he's underneath the other wolf, desperately trying to keep his jaws away from the throat but his paw slips and the wolf manages to sink his teeth into Raph's shoulder, too close to his throat to be good.
I end the wolves life without thinking twice by biting his neck from behind and breaking it.
I lie down next to Raph with a whimper. He's breathing heavily and his wound is gushing blood with every heartbeat. I lick at it in hopes to help him heal but the problem with wounds like this is that it drains energy. And with no energy, werewolves can't heal any faster than humans. Even the wounds on my side are healing incredibly slow.
But I don't have time to dwell on anything now. I change back into my human form, knowing that I won't be able to carry him as a wolf.
'Change back, love. I need to get you out of here.' I whisper to him, trying to hold his eyes that are looking into the distance completely unfocused.
It takes him a while to comprehend, but after a few minutes, he's back in his human form. I almost throw up from the wound. It's ugly and deep and I wouldn't know how to treat it if I had anything to treat it with.
With some struggle I get him on my back, then change back into my wolf form. We're over the border in less than two minutes and on no man's land.
It's not a very long strip as the neighbouring pack land lays just about half an hour away, but I'm not planning on going there. They don't live very close to any town, and my priority is to find a good doctor, no matter if Raph's wound doesn't make sense. If need be, I'll sneak him out of the hospital once he's feeling better.
But only a few minutes after crossing the border I again hear snarling and growling behind us. It's not the same though. It's unfocused and raw and I know we have rogues chasing us.
I lengthen my strides and try to go faster without hurting Raph too much, but his blood is already streaming down my sides and he's threatening to fall off.
My own vision is already fading as my own wounds are taking their toll on me now.
They're getting closer with every second and I'm getting slower with every step.
My legs are shaking as I try to just pull my body further along, to just somehow save Raph, but all I manage is to fall to my knees when I see a wolf appear from behind a tree.
I can barely make out what they look like with my vision going in and out and the last thing I can get my body to do is to let Raph fall to the floor and drape over him, hoping to at least protect him this way.