No love lingering on.
Alyssa couldnât lie. Pain swept through her chest when she said those words out loud.
This pain had become a familiar companion. It was a constant presence in her three years of marriage to Jasper, and she often worried it might trigger a heart attack. It struck her more often than the occasions when Jasper spent time with her.
âWhatâs the point of asking all this now, Jasper? Do you still expect me to feel the same way for you and not move on?â Alyssa asked weakly. She rarely appeared so fragile in front of others.
She continued, âIâve loved you for 13 years. Tell me, how many more years could I possibly sacrifice? I canât bring myself to love you anymore. Iâm afraid to.â
She was scared of loving anyone else at this point.
It felt like someone was squeezing Jasperâs heart. Painful emotion rose like a wave in his throat, cutting his breath off.
He suddenly realized just how vile he had been. Not only had he dragged her down in this meaningless marriage, but he had also ruined her.
âAre you telling the truth, Alyssa?â Jasper asked, knowing he would be defeated by her answer in the end.
Nevertheless, he still tried.
âOf course. When have I ever lied to you?â Alyssa said softly. âI was telling the truth when I said I loved you, when I said I didnât want the divorce, and when I cried those tears⦠Of course I wouldnât lie when I say I donât love you anymore.â
âAlyssaâ¦â Jasperâs eyes were hot with unshed tears. He held her hand. It felt so cold. He couldnât keep it warm anymore.
âThank you for saving me once again, Jasper. I owe you one. Iâll definitely pay back the favor as long as your request isnât too outrageous,â Alyssa said.
It was clear she was setting up boundaries between them once again.
Jasper meant to say something in response, but she had fallen asleep on his shoulder.
He watched her as she did, her flushed cheeks standing out on her pallid complexion, reminiscent of a delicate bunny. He hugged her closer, reminiscing on the countless chances he had before to do this.
He had passed those chances by already. So he was going to appreciate this opportunity here and now as much as he could.
Jasper could only blame himself for how things had turned out.
The walkie-talkie wasnât functioning in this weather, nor could his phone pick up any signal. Though Jasper wanted this moment to last forever, he knew it couldnât, not with Alyssa running a high fever.
Panicked, he kept on feeling for her temperature and pulse.
He had to try to reduce the fever and signal for help. Only then the helicopters and rescue team could find them.
Finally, Jasper went out into the rain to find some dried twigs and branches. He created a fire by the cave entrance to alert any rescuers. Afterward, he made a fire inside the cave so Alyssa could stay warm.
The orange flames lit up Alyssaâs face, highlighting how deeply she rested. Jasperâs gaze grew warm as his eyes traced the contours of her face.
âJasper â¦â Alyssa suddenly mumbled in her sleep.
âIâm here, Alyssa.â Jasper knelt by her side. âDo you feel warmer?â
âYou⦠asshole, Jasper Beckett!â Alyssa suddenly cried. She was having a nightmare.
Next thing Jasper knew, she had swung a hand right in his face.
It didnât hurt, though. It felt like a feather grazing his cheek.