Chapter 8
Respect- اØتراÙ
Since when did the one you hate become the one you missed?
Perhaps the yearning would become unbearable,
That you would risk death just to stay longer in her company.
But fighting against yourself takes the greatest of efforts.
The desert was a relentless place, only the moon and stars bore enough light for them to move forward in the darkness.
Laila heard Hafsa's breathing quicken as the sound of a howl suddenly caught their attention.
"Did you hear that?" Hafsa asked, half hoping it was just the wind. Laila tried to control her own fear, wanting to calm her friend.
The howl sounded again.
"What do we do?" Hafsa asked, her heart racing. Laila was silent before sighing in hopelessness.
"Pray," she encouraged, taking slow steps forward.
Hafsa clutched at her clothes, shivering.
"Wait, I see something," she pointed towards a figure of rocks. Laila turned, thanking the moonlight which shone down on a small cave.
"Shelter," they gasped, sprinting towards it.
"What if there is something in there?" Hafsa abruptly stopped.
"We only need somewhere to rest until daylight. Someone will find us soon, don't worry." Laila comforted despite her own mind holding doubts.
The cave was empty, big enough to hold them both whilst being small enough to stay hidden. Laila sat near the edge of the entrance, snuggling into Hafsa before allowing herself to finally rest.
-
The sound of a racing horse, the heat of a burning sun.
I was found lost, waiting for you to return.
"Laila,"
Her name.
"Laila, wake up." The voice called again.
Her body was shaken, forcing it to awaken.
"Someone's here," Hafsa whispered, cowering behind the cover of the cave. Laila immediately sat up. She stood, tip-toeing towards the barrier between cave and sand.
It was quiet before she noticed a large figure frantically searching around.
There was no hesitation as Laila exited the shelter, weakening under the relentlessness of the heat.
He had found her.
Exhaustion overcame her before he finally noticed the fallen figure. His legs sinking into the sand whilst pushing himself to her height on the desert floor.
Laila breathed in, attempting to blink away the light of the sun so she could look upon him clearly.
Usman took hold of her shoulders, gently shaking her.
"Laila." Her name rolled off of his tongue, forcing her attention.
"U-Usman?" She stuttered through short breaths.
What was it about her?
That just his name off her lips caused him to clutch her in desperation.
Being close was not enough.
Holding her was not enough.
The very sight of her was to pull him from the depths of the earth and bring his soul to life.
He let go, alarmed.
She looked to him like an injured doe. Her wide eyes staring in desperation.
"Are you hurt?" he asked. Laila met his eyes in a trance, shaking her head despite her bruised body.
Usman was frustrated, heaving in annoyance as a strange girl came before him.
"Who are you?" He was menacing as the child cowered under his gaze.
"Hafsa?" Laila called, regaining her senses.
Usman followed her voice.
"Where do you come from? Who are your parents?" Usman interrogated. Hafsa shook her head.
"I am an orphan."
His eyes softened.
"She helped me. Can we not take her with us?" Laila began to plead.
"I am not the one to decide whether she is welcome into the tribe, that is the decision of the sultan." Usman turned towards the horse before stopping and releasing a deep sigh.
"But if you decide to take her as a maidservant, then no one shall stop you." He finally said, giving into Laila's plea.
She released a breath of relief before moving in discomfort. Her legs were exhausted, body aching for rest. Usman bought his hands under her, beginning to lift her into his arms.
"Wait-"
"If you wish to take the girl, you abide by my rules" he whispered. Laila immediately stopped, glaring at the compromise.
"Come Hafsa," she said, submitting to her husband's will.
Hafsa shyly approached, stopping when the sound of horses suddenly neared them.
Usman immediately put Laila to her feet and pushed her behind him, grabbing his sword.
"Hassan?" Usman dropped his stance, less defensive at the presence of his friend.
"I know a woman can make you do crazy things, but you even forgot about us?" Hassan smirked before jumping off of his horse and approaching him.
He shook his hand, not allowing his eyes to meet the lady of his tribe.
"The camp?" Usman asked.
"Safe until your return." Hassan replied. Usman nodded, looking around at the emptiness which surrounded them.
His gaze turned towards his wife, her eyes closing as the desert's heat overcame her.
"Laila?" he called. She nodded, her vision blurring.
She felt herself fall into a pair of arms, the rest of the world disappearing.
ââ
"She is dehydrated. The injuries are minor but will take a few days to heal." The voices came out muffled.
Laila nestled into the blankets surrounding her, comfortable. She would not have moved if the sunlight did not shine through so relentlessly.
Upon releasing a moan of frustration, the others looked towards her in surprise.
"Let Hassan know we will move out tomorrow," Usman commanded before dismissing the doctor. He reached Laila within a second, hesitating as he stopped his hands from stroking her hair.
"You're okay," he attempted to comfort as she opened her eyes.
"Usman?" She called in a croaky voice. He brought forward some water for her to drink.
"What happened?" She finally asked after quenching her thirst.
"You fainted from exhaustion before we brought you back to the camp." Usman took the glass from her hands as the memories returned.
"How long?" Laila asked.
"A day and a half."
She felt nauseous, her empty stomach growling.
Usman reached for a tray of food.
"Eat." He ordered. Laila followed his instruction, too weak to argue.
The soup was comforting to her stomach. She took a small bite of the bread, savouring the fluffy interior.
He admired the sight before him, watching her soft hair fall onto her shoulders. The sun shone brightly, bringing her lightly tanned skin back to life.
A queen amongst savages.
An angel beside a demon.
Yes, a villain he was.
"We were due to leave today, this has now been delayed." Usman stiffened, his tone shifting from gentle to harsh. Laila froze, looking towards him.
"I don't know what to say." Her heart quivered, surprised at his sudden change.
"You were not allowed to leave the tribe's premises." His gaze hardened. "And when you did, you wandered away from the tribe's women!"
Laila clenched her fists.
"You think I walked straight into their arms?" She was hurt, his raised voice causing her eyes to water.
If she cried perhaps it meant his words hurt her.
But how could she be hurt by someone she did not care for?
"Not only do I think you gave them an open invitation, but I also think you endangered the lives of the women of my tribe." He stopped, finally noticing her tears.
Laila felt warm, moving the tray of food aside.
She sat upright, swallowing the lump in her throat.
"And am I not a woman of your tribe?"
Usman scrunched his brows as she hopelessly scoffed.
"I was almost deluded by your acts of affection. I even believed that perhaps you cared when you came to save me." She stopped him from interrupting with a lift of her hand.
"It was the women of your tribe who invited me with them. I trusted in them and yet when I was taken, not one stepped forward to help." Usman rubbed his forehead in frustration.
"Do not blame them-"
"But you can blame me?" She shook her head,
"I thought I could at least earn some dignity by returning, but I was wrong."
"Dignity?" Usman stayed quiet before reaching for her bandaged hands.
"You are covered with injuries from your battle." She met his eyes in confusion.
"I am afraid you have not only kept your dignity, but you have gained my respect." She was dazed, her cheeks warming.
"The girl with you told us everything. You saved her and earned admiration in the camp." Laila forced her hands out of his.
"Then why accuse me of hurting others?" She demanded an explanation.
He sighed, throwing his hands through his hair.
"I only accused you of hurting yourself."
They paused, staring at each other with unknowingness.
"Why do you even care?" She asked as he looked in desperation.
The tent filled with silence.
"I need to keep you safe till we reach the city".
Laila shook her head as he stood, grimacing at the pain in her side whilst following his action.
"There are others." He scrunched his eyebrows in confusion.
"What do you mean?" Usman asked, facing her.
"Hafsa knows of a village full of girls who are also enslaved. One of my kidnappers mentioned a city of gold, I-'' she was quickly interrupted as the man before her erupted.
"What do you mean, escape?!" he shouted, furious at this new information.
"He escaped whilst I was searching for Hafsa," she tried to explain to no avail. Usman grabbed her shoulders.
"That girl told me that you set fire to them both, did she lie?" he asked threateningly.
Laila inhaled before hesitantly placing a hand over his.
"She did not know."
Her voice was gentle, compelling his anger to subside.
He fought against it, against the hold that she seemed to have over his fury.
Usman threw his hands from hers.
"We have to save them," she finally said.
He shook his head.
"It's not my responsibility and neither is it yours. We march to the city tomorrow, no more delays." He stood commanding, refusing to weaken himself again.
"How could you not help them?!" Laila shouted. Her adrenaline was short-lived as he bought his hands on her shoulders and sat her down.
Usman knelt in front of her.
"You hold the resilience of a desert rose." His eyes met hers. "And the beauty of a setting sun."
She held her breath, staring at him in unknowingness. "You are cruel."
"Saving you did not make me a hero." She stared at the floor, intimidated in his presence. He reached for her chin, forcing her head up.
"What goodness could you find me in after what happened to your tribe?" She heard his words clearly.
I am no saviour.
"And what was my crime?" she asked hopelessly.
"Yours was to be born," his hold tightened. "And mine was to have known you."
He left without another word.
Laila fell to the floor, exhausted.
He was right, why did she think he was capable of good?
"Laila," Hafsa rushed in, running to her in worry.
"Did something happen?" She asked, trying to help her friend stand.
"It's nothing." Laila assured, holding back her tears. She reached for Hafsa, embracing her.
"I am glad you are okay." Hafsa smiled, taking hold of her hand.
"Usman has allowed me to stay".
Laila returned the gesture, smiling with an unknowingness.
Who was Usman?
Who was he truly?