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Evie didn't know how long it had been since she stayed locked in her room. She didn't know how long she didn't go out. She didn't know how long she hadn't seen any of her friends except for Embry. And being in summer break wasn't helping. She felt as if she was out of time as if her room was stuck in time as if time itself wasn't functioning in her place. Outside, life was still going on, but not in Evie's room. It was blank, silent, empty. Yet she didn't mind. She felt empty. Who would have thought she would have ended up like this before? She thought of herself as so strong. What had happened? What had happened to her? It wasn't her. She was someone else, something else. Something wasn't right, something was wrong. She knew it. Yet she didn't have the strength to do anything. She didn't have the strength to make a change, to go back to her old self. Was it even possible? Could she be her again? Could she rewind time? But who was she before? It felt so long. How was she like?
The door of her room swung open, putting a stop to her thoughts. Evie looked up. Leah was standing at the frame of the door, dressed in a pair of shorts and a white tank top. She had her usual firm scowl. The oldest sibling of the Clearwater family walked over Evie's bed and opened the curtains roughly. Evie squinted her eyes a little with all the light coming into her room.
"Get you ass up that bed. Now." Leah coldly ordered. Evie frowned. Leah sighed exasperatedly and took her younger sister's hand and pulled her, making her sat up. "Put on new clothes. We're going out."
"I don't feel like it," Evie said, lying down again. Leah sighed again, annoyed.
"You're getting on my nerves, I swear," Leah complained. Evie clenched her jaw, not daring to look at her older sister in the eyes. "Are you seriously gonna lie down every day until Jacob comes back?"
Evie still didn't look at her, averted her eyes somewhere else in her room. She caught sight of her desk lamp. She focused on it.
"Seriously, Evita, wake up!" Leah rose her voice. "Can't you see yourself?! Can't you see what you have become?! You were so strong and independent before! Doing things on your own, fighting fearlessly, standing for what you believe was right, standing for yourself! Now you're here, doing nothing of your days, crying over some boys! You're better than that! You're stronger than that!"
Evie stayed silent. Being lectured was the last thing she wanted. Shouting at her will not make her forget him.
"Jacob might never come back." Leah went on. Evie flinched. The simple thought of that broke her heart even more. If it was Leah's way to help her, it was not working at all. "Don't let him rule your life like that! Show him he was wrong! Make him realise what he did! You're a Clearwater and a Clearwater never let anybody put them down. We're here for you, helping you, but if you don't make any effort on your side then it will never work out. So snap out of it Evita!"
"Leah!" Mrs Clearwater scolded. She was at the frame of the door. Leah sighed, annoyed and went out of the room. Evie still could hear what they were saying as they went down the stairs.
"She needed to be brought back to reality," Leah said. "She needed a push."
"I know, but go easy on her." their mother said.
Evie didn't budge at all. She stayed lied down on her bed, gazing absent-mindedly at her desk. After a moment, Evie heard the door closing. She heard nothing downstairs so she assumed both her sister and mother left. Leah's words were playing again and again and again in Evie's head. How could she even understand what Evie felt? She was so in love with Jacob, he was and still is her imprint, her soulmate, the one she was supposed the spend the rest of her life with, and he left. He left her behind to go somewhere else, to run away from Forks so he wouldn't have to see the girl he once loved getting married to his natural enemy, the man he hated the most on this planet. The pain Evie was feeling was unbearable. Her heart was broken. So how could Leah understand her?
...
"Idiot." Evie thought, insulting herself. "She's the best suited to understand me."
Leah too went through a very hard heartbreak. Leah spent three years of her life dating Sam. Both of them were very much in love with each other. They were always together, going out a lot. They would always wait for the other after school, then come back home together. They would spend loads of time at the other's place. They were in sync, on the same page. Leah considered spending the rest of her life with him. She saw herself with Sam, married. They were the perfect match. But it was not true. They were not meant to be. Leah wasn't his imprintee. Emily was. And even if Sam cared for Leah more than a friend, it was nothing compared to what he felt for Emily. And not being able to resist to the pull, he broke up with Leah. And as he was the very first of the tribe to phase, he couldn't tell her the reason why he broke up, why he broke her heart. It destroyed Leah. It destroyed her hopes, her self confidence. But she rose again, stronger, braver. She changed, becoming tougher. But she decided she wouldn't let him destroy who she was. She was good before him so why wouldn't she after him? Even though seeing him with her cousin was more than hard, she wanted to be strong. She was determined. She was the oldest of her siblings and didn't want to cry over a boy in front of them. She wanted to be an example for Seth and Evie, and it was what kept her going.
So yes, Leah was one, even the best suited to understand Evie. She knew what she was talking about. Pain. Leah knew it. It was an old friend of her. But Evie was not Leah. She was not as strong as she was. Could she really do like Leah and get over it? Could she rise again, just like her sister? She knew Leah was right. Everything she said to her was right. But could Evie do like her?
"You were so strong and independent before! Doing things on your own, fighting fearlessly, standing for what you believe was right, standing for yourself!" Leah said.
Yes. Leah was right. Evie was stronger than she thought. She just forgot it. She remembered how she truthfully told the tribe how she felt at the bond fire, she remembered how she fearlessly fought Victoria, she remembered how she stood for her thoughts to Jacob, she remembered how she fought during the battle. She was strong. She went through hell months ago and she was still up. She fought an army of newborn vampires for heaven sack! And she was still alive. And now here she was, in her bed doing nothing because of a boy. She was still hurt. She couldn't deny it. But only she had the power to change it. And it will be easier with help of her family and her friends. And she still and will always love him. She knew it, he was her soulmate. They were meant to be. But if he ever came back, she will not go easy on him. Like Leah told her, Evie will make him see what he did, what she went through because of him.
Now she realised. She had never really done any effort. She was persuading herself she was. Because it meant that her loved ones wouldn't be hurt anymore. But now she realised. She had to do something. She needed to do something. Evie would go slowly, at a slow pace. Healing is an unhurried process. But she will go through it. Just like her sister, Evie will rise again.
So Evie sat up. She slapped herself with her two hands to wake her up fully. She stood up and went to the bathroom to take a shower. She put on new clothes (which were just shorts and a tank top) and tied her long hair in a low ponytail. She hadn't cut her hair, letting them grow again. During that last month, she wasn't feeling like doing anything, even cutting her hair. She didn't even phase since. She couldn't do it anymore. But it was just because she wasn't' feeling like it. She had an emotional block. She knew she would go over it. But right now, she'd rather keep her long hair.
Evie walked back into her room. It needed a cleansing. So she sighed, determined and cleaned up the mess. When it was time to clean her desk, she looked a moment to the photograph of herself and Jacob. She felt a slight peng in her heart but she put down the frame, glass against the wood of the desk. It wasn't a moment to think about him. Now she should think about herself, to her own health and well being. She was the priority now.
Once the cleaning was done, Evie sat on her bed. She looked over her room. It was a new beginning. It was the start of the healing. It was the beginning of her rebirth.
Her eyes then caught sight of her phone. It was placed on her bedside table. Evie reached for it, taking it. She switched it on. She directly opened the messaging app. There was plenty of texts she hadn't opened and read. Some from Quil, Edward and Bella. Evie opened every one and each of them. They were all asking how she was doing, showing support and care. Evie was relieved to have such good friends by her side. She answered them all properly, telling them she was well, getting better. Then, she opened Embry's contact name. The last text was from him. He was asking how she was. It dated from weeks ago. After that, he stopped texting her as always visited her to see how she was doing, do be by her side. Evie was grateful to him. She felt so lucky to have Embry as a friend. After a moment, she finally started to write and then sent him a text.
"Is that offer to the beach is still valid?" she texted.